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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » How do I meet people who will accept me the way I am?

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Author Topic: How do I meet people who will accept me the way I am?
Member # 11590

Icon 5 posted      Profile for Bayaway     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi, I'm a gay 17 year old male and I recently came out my friends and family.

The problem is, my family is hardcore Cristian, my dad is actually a preacher, and I've been homeschooled for most of my life. I've never had lots of friends and the friends I did have are all Christian too, and since I came out I no longer have any friends. I'd like to make new friends, start dating and doing normal stuff, but I don't know how to meet people. Like I said before, I homeschool, and the group I homeschool with is also Christian, so there isn't anything like a gay-straight alliance. All my (former)friends think I'm being controlled by the devil and won't have anything to do with me. My family is useless, the only one who is fine with me being gay is my oldest sister and she says she doesn't know how I should meet people.

Phew! Sorry about the long rant, but I desperately need some advice.

Posts: 1 | From: Calgary, Alberta, Canada | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 11078

Icon 1 posted      Profile for roziline     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Usually people start to accept things. I told my best friend that I'm bi. He is a christian and he doesnn't agree with homosexuality but being my best friend, he accepted it. If you give your family time they may well come around.

Start getting out and about. Meet new people. One night go out into a town and visit a gay bar! socialising with other gay people who have been in the same situation as you are in could help.

But, most importantly. Don't feel you can't talk to someone about it. Just sitting down with your parents and talking about it. IT really could help. But time will only tell and you are 17 so you have plenty of that!

the girl dreams are made of =)

Posts: 68 | From: UK | Registered: Dec 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 226

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Dzuunmod     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Ask and ye shall receive...

Here are some resources for gays and gay youth in Calgary:

-GLCSA (Gay & Lesbian Community Services Association) (403) 234-8973 Fax: (403) 261-9776
206, 223 - 12 Ave. S.W., Calgary, AB T2R 0G3
Offers services for people questioning their sexual orientation, call for other current programs & support.
They have a youth group that meets weekly.

Then, at the post-secondary education institutions in your city, there are queer groups that, if nothing else, can refer you to people your own age (though it looks like you'll be old enough to be in college/university pretty soon.

At Mount Royal College, there's Diversity. Contact them at (403) 240-6401.

At the University of Calgary, there's GLASS.
G.L.A.S.S. (Gay, Lesbian & Bisexual Academic Students & Staff)
312 Old MacEwan Hall, 2500 University Dr. N.W. Calgary, AB T2N 1N4 (403) 220-2872 University of Calgary's support group for gay/lesbian/bisexual academics & students.

I stole this info from the GLBTAlberta Web site:

Good luck!

"And when I'm gone, she'll never leave me. No, no she'll never, be untrue. And buddy if you do not believe me, you don't believe the sky is blue."
-Joel Plaskett, Down at the Khyber

Posts: 1515 | From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 11745

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If you're okay with meeting people online (or possibly more) I found a great site for GLBT 13-25 ... Anyway straight to the point- Cheers!

If I could be anything in the world, I'd be a professional Cinderella.

Posts: 1 | From: Sydney, NSW, Australia | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 11950

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wellllllllll, if there's a university in your area, they're likely to have a gay straight alliance type thing; look on their website, send them a letter, attend some meetings. and just meet random people when you do get to college, and if they ask, tell them. if they don't like you because of it, then they're rather close minded and you're too much for them to handle because they cant fathom anything outside their little box.


Posts: 20 | Registered: Feb 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 11515

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Hey there!
My name is Ria. I'm a 19 year old lesbian. Originally from Red Deer, I now live in Edmonton. I know it can be hard to get in contact with gay folk in this lovely province of ours--from the time I came out to friends to the time I started meeting people a year long period retrospect I wish I had jumped in sooner. These fine scarleteen folks are right: get in touch with the queer group at the UofC. I'm on the exec of Outreach, the UofA campus group and I think we're going to try and get the four post-secondary campus groups together this summer sometime, so if you get involved maybe I'll see you there!

Also, you might want to find a gay-positive faith community. I've recently become a member of an affirming united church. There are also specifically gay focused ministeries in Edmonton and there probably are also in Calgary. If, as I imagine, you are coming out of a very conservative Christain background, the philosophies of these congregations might seem sacrilegiously liberal. However, Christ is Christ and God is God and gathering with queer people and queer-friendly people of faith can be really lovely. It also makes for a pleasant alternative to the bar scene, which is really really fun, but can sometimes lead to a person getting lost.

Also, try GayCanada online if you have access to a computer. Be careful, because sometimes creeps go one there, but the Alberta boards usually have good discussions among guys your age.

All the best! Ria

PS if by any chance you're Lutheran, post or otherwise contact me and I'll put you in contact with a kick-ass gay-positive lutheran reverend here on campus who has spoken to Outreach.

PPS if for some reason you're having trouble, contact the outreach listserve and put my name in the subject line and if it passes the screening filter thingys (ie you message isn't not obscene, which I suspect it won't be), it'll find it's way to me.
the site address:

(I edited 'cause I can't spell...but I'm to tired to fix all the mistakes I made...must go to sleep :P )

[This message has been edited by Issy (edited 05-05-2003).]

Posts: 10 | From: Edmonton, AB CANADA | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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