How do you know if someone is gay? You ask. Here's where the hard part comes in--how do you ask? Bluntly, subtly? Casually bring it up in a conversation or pull them aside and ask? What do you think?
Posts: 356 | From: Phoenix--name that plurally | Registered: Dec 2000
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I never make a move on someone unless I know that they're gay. So, I just ask them bluntly. If they say yes - wahey! If they say no, they either shrug it offf (and really don't mind), or they say (and I quote)
"NO WAY! I'm no ****ing battyboy! Are you a ****ing perv! Ewwwww - gross! Get away from me! Ah, ah, ah - YOU TOUCHED MY SHOULDER! AAAAAAHHHH!"
This is a good thing, as it lets you know whether people have that tiny little problem with your sexuality. In that case,, either shout them down, or, as I do, ask them in calming tones what their problem is. (They invariably get tounge twisted.)
In all, just ask people straight out (no pun intended).
i came right out and asked one chick. yeah she got mad, but hell, i didn't care, cuz i wanted to know, since we were all speculating anyway. most people i don't ask about, i just talk about my gayness so that if they are and need someone to talk to, they can talk to me bout it.
I personally would never ask someone straight out. And here's my reasoning why: I'm still in the closet to everyone I know except my mom and 2 of my friends. If someone were to ask me if I was gay, I probably wouldn't be ready to tell them. I'm horrible at lying, so they'd easily be able to see through my discomfort and know I'm lying. One of my greatest fears is that someone will ask me if I'm gay, and I'll be outted when I'm not ready yet. That's the key thing. When I'm ready to be out, I won't mind people asking me. But I'm only 15. I'm not ready to have details about my sexual orientation spread throughout the whole school. So my opinion is to not ask her straight out. Maybe do like nappyafrochik and mention queerness and maybe that'll ease them into feeling comfortable enough come out.
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