Just so you know, I'm female, and I've known I was bisexual since I was 10 (I know that sounds ridiculous, but I grew up very quickly). I am now 14 and leaning more towards girls at the moment.
I find it very hard to ask people out, because when it comes to that I am very shy. I have also had many experiences with bi girls I know who give me the excuse of looking for guys at the moment. I have also had a girl tell me that I had a great personality, but I wasn't physically attractive (That made me even shyer).
Comments, advice, hate messages. All is welcome. Thanks.
My advice would be to take your time and not rush right into asking people out -- spend a while getting to know them better, just hanging out, maybe flirt and joke around a little. If you already know someone as a friend, it'll probably make it a lot easier to take the next step.
Now, on to the comment about you not being physically attractive -- hogwash! Everyone is attractive in some way or another. Trust me on this, hon, 'cause I really mean it. I've never seen a person who wasn't attractive in some way. I've seen plenty of people who just weren't my type, but that didn't mean they weren't attractive -- just that they weren't quite what I usually find attractive. Does that make any sense?
Great advice (as usual) from Kyth here. I can only add that indeed, everyone is attractive in some way - be it from the in- or outside or in multiple ways. Just because that one girl thought you weren't her type (and told you so in a rather rude way) doesn't mean you aren't attractive! I am absolutely sure that there are things about you which are simply wonderful, be it your smile, or your eyes, or the way that you dance or the way you laugh. What a bummer for that girl that she couldn't see that!
I agree with Kyth - just get to know people first before you ask them out for a coffee or so, I find that a lot easier if I already know people! If you're looking to meet some queer youth, maybe you might want to check out a GLBT group, if you live in a larger city.
And hey, don't worry about hate messages here - You won't get those at Scarleteen. Even if we sometimes disagree on certain issues, everone here is accepted the way (s)he is. Welcome to our love bubble!
------------------ Caro ~spanking new Scarleteen Sexpert~
"Through repetition the magic will be forced to rise." Alchemical Precept
[This message has been edited by Alaska (edited 10-29-2001).]
Thanks for your advice. Unfortunatly Alaska, I don't think they have a GBLT youth thingy where I am. Firstly I live in a small town.......make that small COUNTRY town, so I'm not exactly that bold enough to find out. *Blushes* I'm a little ashamed of being scared to find out. I just don't want anymore trouble with people.
Posts: 7 | From: Australia | Registered: Oct 2001
| IP: Logged |
I'm glad to be of help. And I see Caro has found some excellent web resources for you -- you may be surprised at how many queer people there are in small towns. I live in a rather small and relatively backwards rural town, and I know I'm not the only queer person here. I see just as many rainbow stickers and such here as I did when I lived in a city that had easily 20 times as many people.
I also want to mention, if you or anyone else here gets "hate messages" or other nasty replies, please let me or one of the other moderators know right away, okay? The moderators are listed up at the top of the main page of each forum, right below the forum name.
Mind you, I'm not trying to discourage anyone from stating their opinion on a subject, even if it disagrees with someone else's opinon -- respectful disagreement and discussion is a good thing. But being rude or insulting someone isn't particularly constructive, and it's also against the guidelines y'all have to agree to when you sign up.
Okay, lecture over. Back to our regularly scheduled discussion...
Just thought I'd drop in and say hi since I'm from aus too! I've lived in a country town, though before I discovered I was bi. You'll find people are out there, though most often they aren't holding signs that read "I'm gay".
Hugs & Scully, Winnie :0)
Posts: 465 | From: Canberra, ACT, Australia | Registered: Jan 2001
| IP: Logged |
Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998
Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.