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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Pregnancy and Parenting » Infant very early

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Author Topic: Infant very early
Saffron Raymie
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My friend told me that our other friend Lucy was hurt when she was between six and seven months pregnant, causing the pregnancy to end. The baby was alive was put on a breathing machine. My friend thinks Lucy is considering adoption but cannot think clearly.

Is this possible?

(This person has a history of dishonesty and Lucy thinks of me as a sister)

[ 07-27-2011, 08:13 AM: Message edited by: RaeRay2112 ]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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Heather
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I'm not sure what you're asking.

Are you asking if an infant born that prematurely can survive or not?

If so, with proper medical care, yes, at this point many are often able to survive.

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Captain Girl
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It's totally possible, and the description is *hugely* simplified, but nonetheless pretty spot-on for treatment for premature babies.

That doesn't mean your source is being honest, but you could call Lucy and ask how she's doing.

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Saffron Raymie
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Ah okay, just wondered if it sounded completely incorrect to you guys.

Capt. Girl, her phone's been off for a while but I might go see her dad and ask. Thanks for you help.

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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atm1
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Six to seven months pregnant likely means that she's around 27-31 weeks pregnant. While many infants born around that time do not make it, just as many others do. It is highly likely, though, that the infant will be in the hospital for several months, even with the best medical care.

Definitely check in with her family since you are very close and offer to help the family out in some way (bringing food, just coming with a blanket and a hug). Having a very premature infant is incredibly stressful under the best of circumstances, and I'm sure she'd appreciate at least knowing that you're sending good thoughts her way.

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Saffron Raymie
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Good idea atm1, will do [Smile]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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Captain Girl
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quote:
Six to seven months pregnant likely means that she's around 27-31 weeks pregnant. While many infants born around that time do not make it, just as many others do. It is highly likely, though, that the infant will be in the hospital for several months, even with the best medical care.

Misunderstandings about the treatments and outcomes for premature babies sometimes lead to parents of preemies being accused of torturing their children by allowing medical care, or of burdening society by enhancing the odds that disabled children will survive. Consequently, I have these knee-jerk responses about providing accurate stats. (My daughter was born at 32 weeks, and spent 32 days in the NICU. She is fine, and there have been no lasting health consequences of her early arrival.)

ATM is underselling the outcomes for premature babies by a fair bit - According to the March of Dimes, 80% of babies born at 26 weeks survive, and 96% of those born between 28 and 31 weeks. At 32 and 33 weeks, the survival rate is 98%. How long the baby will be in the hospital is hard to guess. Boys tend to need longer NICU stays than girls (testosterone inhibits the production of lung surfactant), and a lot depends on the circumstances leading to premature delivery.

It is certainly best for babies to be born at term or after, however, NICU care continues to improve, and many babies are ready to go home around their original due dates. On the one hand, that's great! Healthy babies are win! But the process can leave parents feeling unprepared and kind of flattened.

RaeRae, if you'd like some ideas about things to do for your friend, or how to help her get through this time, I'd be happy to talk about that.

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atm1
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Oh, I was basing my advice on older numbers, apparently. Just 10 years ago, things were quite different (I actually have one friend my age who was born at 27 weeks, and back then in the 80s, she was not expected to survive).

Thanks for adding more information, Captain Girl!

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Saffron Raymie
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Thank you Captain Girl. Unfortunately this happened to Lucy (I didn't use her real name because she reads Scarleteen and I don't have her permission to use it) because of physical abuse, not just a preterm birth so things are very difficult with her own health and trauma at the moment. She is also quite a young, vulnerable teen, when she gets better I will send her here, she has read Scarleteen before and likes it.

I will take her some things like atm said; blanket, food and hugs, and hopefully this won't affect her fertility and her baby will be okay.

Maybe I could get her to make an account and post in this thread when she gets better, so you don't have to help her through a third party.

Can't believe this happened [Frown]

[ 07-29-2011, 01:15 PM: Message edited by: RaeRay2112 ]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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atm1
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When I've had family members in the hospital, softer blankets have been appreciated since some of the ones they have there aren't exactly cozy. If she's out of the hospital, maybe flowers would be nice? (If she's a flowers person!)

Since you mentioned she was thinking about adoption, I do think that it's wise to avoid getting anything that is for the baby for now. It'll be quite a long time before the baby comes home (probably at least 7 or 8 weeks), so it's not like she'll be needing things for the baby at home yet.

She's lucky to have a good friend like you!

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Captain Girl
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Your friend may decide to place her baby for adoption, but that doesn't change the fact that she is a mother now, that she carries all the decisions and responsibilities and burdens of parenting until and unless she decides to hand them over. I have heard plenty of parents who placed their children for adoption say that they treasure the memories of the brief time that they had with their children, and kept baby clothes and blankets as souvenirs.

Baby blankets and hats are kind of awesome preemie presents. When my daughter was in the hospital, the nurses *really* encouraged us to bring personal things for her. In my experience, it really did help. Leaving aside the things it did for me, it encouraged the nurses to fuss over her, and spend a little more time with her, which helped her to do better faster than she otherwise might have.

If you do want to stick with things strictly for Lucy, food is an excellent choice. Hand lotion is also really good for people who are spending a lot of time in hospitals - they have to wash their hands a ton, and they can get really dry.

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