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Author Topic: Scared
Anonymous2312
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I have a problem. Me and my best friend have known each other for over 8 years. We have sexual intercourse about once a day. He does not cum inside of me, though. I don't know if he had any pre-cum on his penis before this,(foreplay) so I'm not sure. I was supposed to have started my period a while ago. About 2 or 3 weeks to be exact. This has not happened before. We do not use condoms. We love each other very much and we agreed that if I did get pregnant he would stay around and take care of the baby. But my urine has been very dark, somtimes it's even clear. This hasn't happened until now. We have both been tested and we do not have anything. I'm getting some very weird feelings, and pains in my genital area, bad headaches, and really bad stomachaches, something I've never had before. No medicine seems to work. What should I do, are those some signs of being pregnant? Help. PLEASE.

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~*+-Feel what you think when you think what you feel-+*~ -Me


Posts: 5 | From: Katy,TX, U.S.A. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lemming
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Oh, sweetie. Withdrawal is not a form of birth control. You could very well be pregnant.

But we can't tell you that from way over here, over the 'Net. The only way to tell for sure if you're pregnant is to take a pregnancy test. Go with your best friend to the drugstore, pick one up, and see what it says.

Then come back and tell us, and we can help you out a little better.

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com.
"Did you see my friend? He couldn't believe it, 'The girls are holding hands, the girls are holding hands!' Don't be a fool, it's 1995, the girls are just friends." --Belle and Sebastian, "Photo Jenny"


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
KittenGoddess
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Sweetie, there are no symptoms that you can use to diagnose pregnancy. Some women will have certain changes, some won't...and sometimes it'll be right away, sometimes it won't. The only way you're going to know is to get a pregnancy test. Call your doctor, or the local clinic, or your local planned parenthood and make an appointment right away.

And from now on, use condoms, eh? They're your friends. And look into a birth control pill and/or a diaphram. Really dear, the "withdrawl method" isn't a method at all. Doing it that was is just playing Russian Roulette with pregnancy. Eventually you're going to lose, that's just the way it is. Pre-ejaculate is there, whether you can see it or not.

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Posts: 7316 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SlowCookie
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You're having unprotected sex on the regular basis? I am awestruck. There is no point in my asking why you would do such a thoughtless thing or why is it so difficult to use a condom, so I will just continue.

You have a very high pregnancy risk. Please go out and get a pregnancy test. Then make an appointment with a clinic, pick up some free condoms and start using a reliable method of birth control. Good luck.

Please think more about the "well if I get pregnant, he'll stick around and take care of it" idea. I know it sounds trite but that's easier said than done. Saying that you will take care of a baby does not simply result in financial and emotional capability.


Posts: 681 | From: Florida, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Anonymous2312
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Well everyone. I've taken a test before and it said that I was, but I turned out not. I cn't take the pill because my mom doesn't want to get it for me. And I'm not old enough to have insurance of my own. We have had it protected, but it feel better when it's not. I know he'll stick around, we love each other. Trust me with this one. I'm getting bloated and fatigued. I do plan on going to a clinic, but I can't seem to find one near me.
Posts: 5 | From: Katy,TX, U.S.A. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lemming
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Statistically speaking, the chances are very good that you are pregnant if you have been having intercourse on average of once a day, unprotected, whether it feels better or not.

Someone you can call in your area (free call!) to find out about Planned Parenthood and other centers in the Houston metro area, and just for someone to talk to, is Crisis Hotline of Houston.

Crisis Hotline 713-HOTLINE
Crisis Hotline Bay Area 281-461-9992
Teenline 713-529-TEEN
Spanish Hotline 713-526-8088

Hang on to these numbers. And go down to Walgreens and GET A PREGNANCY TEST! The sooner you know, the more you can discuss this with your partner.

Tell us how it goes.

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com.
"Did you see my friend? He couldn't believe it, 'The girls are holding hands, the girls are holding hands!' Don't be a fool, it's 1995, the girls are just friends." --Belle and Sebastian, "Photo Jenny"


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Aria51
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Yes yes yes. Get tested, tomorrow. Call Planned Parenthood. Tell your mother that you're sexually active, and that you need her help getting birth control. If she does not agree, there are still ways to get birth control for yourself. Again, call Planned Parenthood.

Since you have been having unprotected sex on an extremely regular basis, you have a smaller chance of NOT being pregnant at this point.

If you are having other health issues, such as the dark urine and the pains, you really need to get yourself to a doctor anyway. You could have some sort of STD that needs to be treated.

I'm going to agree with SlowCookie when she said, "Please think more about the "well if I get pregnant, he'll stick around and take care of it" idea." Sticking around with someone *just because* a baby is on the way is a terrible reason to stick with that person, IMHO. You need to start thinking about what you alone can do for this baby, and that way you will not feel as shocked and helpless if he doesn't stay with you. It sounds pessimistic, but I'm just trying to give you a dose of reality here.

On to the condom thing. You may think intercourse feels better without a condom, but how does all this worrying feel? How will an unplanned pregnancy feel? Now compare that with the added confidence a condom will give you. As it's been said, withdrawl is NOT a method of birth control. While you're at the store picking up your home pregnancy test, pick up some condoms as well, and become a No Glove No Love Girl right this second!

You are indeed old enough to have your own insurance. You can be on Medicaid(care?). And if you have insurance through your parent/s, there are ways to get your baby on that insurance as well. I can tell you how.

So, yeah. Take that test, tomorrow. Start using condoms immediately. Go to the doctor, talk to your mother. Talk to your partner if he doesn't know what's going on. Then, come back and tell us what happened and then we can help you further.


Good luck.

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How can you not like muffins?!

This surely was the product of a twisted mind.


Posts: 1287 | From: Missouri | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Anonymous2312
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He's not going to just stick around if I am. He's not like that. He's going to stick around anyways. Trust me, we love each other. I've taken a pregnancy test before, and it said I was. But it turned out not.So... How can I get insurance if I"m not 18 quite yet? My mom and I talked about Birtch Control, she said NO, NO, AND NO! I don't know why. You people think I'm stupid, at least one of you does. And I didn't come here to get criticized, I came here for some help. I've already been tested for STDs likeI said. Everything came out negatove both for me and my best friend. How can I possibly get Birth Control if my mom won't let me and if I"m not yet 18, so I can't get my own insurance... don't you have to be 18? I need help. My best friend knows what's going on and he's very confused. We both are. Thank you for all your help. Everyone.

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~*+-Feel what you think when you think about what you feel-+*~ -Me


Posts: 5 | From: Katy,TX, U.S.A. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Aria51
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Have you called Planned Parenthood yet? They'll answer your questions about getting birth control.

When did you take the pregnancy test that showed a false positive? False positives are very rare, so don't let it keep you from taking another.


Posts: 1287 | From: Missouri | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SlowCookie
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quote:
I've already been tested for STDs likeI said. Everything came out negatove both for me and my best friend. How can I possibly get Birth Control if my mom won't let me and if I"m not yet 18...

Let me get this straight... You were able to get to a clinic and get tested for STDs, yet you can't go back to that same clinic and get birth control pills or free condoms? Don't say your mom won't let you since she probably wouldn't let you have sex, and wouldn't let you get an STD screening either, and you were able to accomplish both. If you're responsible enough to have sex, then you should be responsible enough to use a reliable form of birth control. Don't use your mom as an excuse.

You keep telling us that you guys love each other. Not to be too cynical but for as sweet and wonderful as love is, it's not going to feed and clothe a baby. If you two are as confused as you say you are, what makes you think that you will be able to care for this baby, if indeed you are pregnant? You can think of having a baby hypothetically and in your mind, everything will be okay. But once that baby is really there, you can't make it disappear, you can't pretend and hypothesize anymore. You have to take care of it. Really, give this whole situation alot of thought. Remember, condoms are a lifesaver.

PLease call 1-800-230-PLAN to contatct Planned Parenthood.


Posts: 681 | From: Florida, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
BruinDan
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My geography-addled brain tells me that Katy is about 20 or so miles west of Houston. Am I correct in that assessment? If so, that would put you well within reach of several Planned Parenthood locations that can be found on this site.

Nobody here thinks you are stupid, and nobody here means to criticize...it's just that part of being mature and responsible means taking responsibility for yourself. And a big, huge, gigantic part of taking responsibility for yourself means watching out for your sexual health. You are essentially playing Russian Roulette with your future, and it really wouldn't take too much effort to go to a clinic and get yourself protected here. Please, for your well-being and the well-being of the child you will inevitably produce if you fail to use protection, get yourself taken care of. Okay? It's as simple and as complicated as that.

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Anonymous2312
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Either you people aren't listening right, or it's not registering. I've tried to ask my mom to take me to the doctor so I can get some BD pills. She said number 1, she doesn't have the money tat this time, and number 2, even if she did, then no. She doesn't want me having sex and she doesn't want me being on BC. I don't know how to get Birth Control any other way than going through a doctor. I've called the clinic and they said unless I'm 18, I can't get BC without my parent's consent. I don't know if that's true or not, but that's what the woman said. I just don't know what to do. I don't even know if I should have come here for help anyway. All you people are doing is criticizing me and making me feel even worse.

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~*+-Feel what you think when you think about what you feel-+*~ -Me


Posts: 5 | From: Katy,TX, U.S.A. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Aria51
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quote:
Originally posted by Anonymous2312:
I don't even know if I should have come here for help anyway. All you people are doing is criticizing me and making me feel even worse.



You came here asking for help, and we are offering it the only way we can. You have been given suggestions and numbers to call. How you interpret these suggestions is up to you, but I can assure you it is against everyone's best interests to criticize anyone.

You do not need to be 18 or have parental consent to get birth control from Planned Parenthood. Or a doctor even, in most cases. The lovely KittenGoddes found this link for you:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/library/FAQ's.html#PILL

a quote from the link:

"To make an appointment for confidential birth control counseling at your nearest Planned Parenthood, call toll-free 1-800-230-PLAN. Parental consent is not required for minors to get birth control pills."

Other than telling you this stuff, I really don't know what we can do for you. If you have any suggestions on how we can help you further, we're all ears, but we've given you the information you need to work through this.

[This message has been edited by Aria51 (edited 10-18-2001).]


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SlowCookie
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You really should give PP a call. It's a very helpful and understanding organization. Plus, they won't tell you that you have to be 18. In fact, when I was underage, I thought going to PP was pretty cool. I got my annual exam, STD screening, 12 months of BC pills, a baggie of safe sex goodies, all for $20. At some PP clinics, they do it all for free. So please, help yourself and give Planned Parenthood a call.
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negative*nancy
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I have a question, and I'm not intending to make you feel bad, i just want the straight, honest truth.

Do you WANT to get pregnant?


Posts: 361 | From: toronto, ontario, canada | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Anonymous2312
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No, I do not want to get prehnant. I gave PP a call and they were closed. I called after 3, not knowing the hours. Me and my best friend plan on going out there to get that. Thank you all for your help.

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~*+-Feel what you think when you think about what you feel-+*~ -Me


Posts: 5 | From: Katy,TX, U.S.A. | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lemming
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Please let us know how it goes, sweetie.

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~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

want to know the inner lemming? read her diary at http://innerlemming.diaryland.com.
"Did you see my friend? He couldn't believe it, 'The girls are holding hands, the girls are holding hands!' Don't be a fool, it's 1995, the girls are just friends." --Belle and Sebastian, "Photo Jenny"


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
CupcakePrincess
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quote:
Originally posted by Anonymous2312:
She doesn't want me having sex and she doesn't want me being on BC.


well then Why dont you follow Her Wishes? and not have sex? Sex seems to Be what got you in this mess in the First Place. Just a thought

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When You think your life Is Horrible, ask Me about Mine... It will change your Mind.

~*~*Jen*~*~


Posts: 27 | From: crystal Lake Il US | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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