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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » From Body Hate to Body Love

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Author Topic: From Body Hate to Body Love
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Have you had a part or aspect of your body that you had a very hard time accepting, but which you later were able to gain acceptance for, even appreciation or love?

What was it? How did you get there, from that negative place to a positive one? What are some things you feel worked for you in that regard you'd suggest others in a similar spot try?

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Natalie H
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I'm by all means not a big girl, like AT ALL, but I was never ever satisfied with how my stomach looked. See, the women in my family all have prominent curves in our back, so it makes our tummies look like they stick out much farther than they should. Anyway, I hated it. I'd jump back and forth from anorexia to sit ups whenever I started feeling this way.

Somewhere along the line I stopped zooming in on that one aspect of my body and looked at the big picture. My WHOLE self was beautiful. And once I saw that, it was much easier to see that my stomach was never as big a deal as I thought it was.

Also, now I just don't care. I've developed a big sense of 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' and about society's 'norms' of what's attractive and beautiful. So I know now that all the insecurity I had over my stomach was just society whispering into my ear, 'Thinner, thinner, thinner' when really I AM thin, thin enough, and any thinner would be unhealthy. And I AM beautiful. My looks don't have to be up to the American standard for me to be beautiful, because I FEEL beautiful and that makes me look beautiful.

Bicycle? I prefer a homocycle.

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Scarleteen Volunteer
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When I was around 12 or 13, I HATED my feet.

They're a size 9, and wide enough that have a very hard time finding shoes that fit. I have to search forever to find regular tennis shoes, and almost never wear heels because they just don't come in my size, and when I manage to squish them into regular width shoes it hurts like crazy.

When I first started Jr. High, I refused to wear any open toed shoes.

I'm not really sure when t changed, but eventually i realized that having big feet wasn't really that big of a deal. Throughout high school, I pretty much lived in flip flops.

Sometimes i still wish i could find cute shoes that fit, but overall, i've got no problem with my feet.

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I used to dislike my belly, butt, and thighs. There are quite a few things that helped, but here's a highlight:

-The I Think You're Freaking Gorgeous movement that was begun by people I know; it's about giving sincere compliments to strangers when the mood strikes you (if, of course, it's tactful and a good idea). The idea is that people get so much negative reinforcement around their bodies and looks all the time, and we want to counteract some of that if we can. Giving compliments to strangers has helped me take a more honest look at myself.

-Related to the above, I am lucky to exist in a very positive environment in general, and all of my close friends love complimenting people in general. The specific ones have helped the most; people have told me that I move like/have the build of a dancer, or that I have really fantastic legs. My partners, especially, make sure to remind me how beautiful I am. Self-esteem has to come from within, but external positive reinforcement can sure help!

-Realizing how many of my gorgeous, stunning friends are insecure about the way they look. "Hey, if these people are beautiful and are still insecure, maybe my insecurities are just as untrue as theirs!"

-And finally, a short anecdote: I was clicking through pictures that people had tagged of me when I found one of a girl walking. It was taken from behind and at a distance, so at first I didn't recognize who it was, and went "Daaaaaaaamn! Who is that hot... Oh. It's me. Well, I guess I feel attractive today!"

Goodness, that was longer than I expected.


The highest result of education is tolerance. -Helen Keller

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Member # 49674

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Well I can't say I really love any part of my body but I have gone from hating my entire body to being generally okay with it. I've had huge weight shifts and went from wearing a size 2 in middle school to a size 24 in high school (my gain was due to bulimia).
I lost 2/3s of the weight I had gained when I started saying no to bulimia and stopped making myself vomit. Quitting my e.d. and the resulting weight loss made me feel much better about myself.
After that, what helped the most was time and maturity. I started questioning the ways women are represented in the media...and I started getting angry about it. I started talking to like-minded people about the misrepresentation and butchering of bodies in the media. Getting my feelings out about body image helped a lot. I started to realize that the problem wasn't my body, but the unrealistic messages I was getting about my body.
Not gonna lie, this all took 10 years but at last, my body is no longer a battleground.

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I have a lot of body related angst, but with the encouragement from my psychologist I've tried to learn to see some good in myself, and allow myself to sincerely feel good about myself. It's still in the works, but on my better days, I rather like my thighs. I try to catch a glimpse of my legs when I'm walking on the streets from the windows, haha.
I suppose it comes in handy. I've gotten rid of a lot of unflattering, ill fitting jeans. [Big Grin]

Usually if I spend a bit of time by myself without seeing other women I'm rather content with my body. Too bad my must-compare-and-seek-a-norm-must-fit-in mentality will quickly trash that contentment after I leave the comfort of my home and see all the better looking people out there. Working on that.

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I used to feel upset about being fat a lot of the time, but then I read stuff about fat acceptance, I also decided that I'm done with feeling ashamed about not living up to some aesthetic standard, I realised that everyone is beautiful. Having a boyfriend who loves me for who I am has really helped as well, but I'm actually feeling like even if we broke up I'd still like what I see when I look in the mirror now.

Always knock before entering my room when I am in there alone, as I may be doing all sorts of wonderfully thrilling things that I'd rather you didn't see.

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Saffron Raymie
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 49582

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I used to hate my breasts. I hated the way that culture makes me feel I have to see then as something sexual and a stimulant for people to get aroused.

But we're people, not parts. [Smile]

'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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Member # 48505

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I've always hated my hips. Everytime I was told I had nice 'child birthing' hips I just wanted to crawl under a rock, but no matter what working out you do, those aren't going to get any smaller... I don't know when it happened and I don't know what did it, but suddenly I just started liking them more..
Posts: 9 | From: United States | Registered: Aug 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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