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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » Masturbation - never inserted a finger

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Author Topic: Masturbation - never inserted a finger
livz
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I do masturbate, but I never inserted fingers to masturbate. Over the past year I have tried inserting a finger and so far just one finger is all I can get. Is that normal? am I too tight? how do I not make myself this tight? I've tried with lube as well but every time I try to put another finger inside it hurts.
Posts: 15 | From: UK | Registered: Mar 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
EliotDorian
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You don't *have* to insert a finger, you know. FWIW, I don't, normally. I mean, there's a reason most women don't orgasm through penis in vagina intercourse alone. If only stimulating the external parts works for you... well, if it ain't broke, why fix it?

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Cian
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I also feel that as fingers are more pointy they will more readily poke around uncomfortably, or painfully, whereas a penis (or penis shaped object) may only feel uncomfortable or hurt if not properly prepared. In my case anyway.
It's unlikely to be a matter of tightness, but your hymen may be intact, or you may be nervous, or the simple fact that fingers come in at a very awkward angle and it's simply difficult to put them in.

So I wouldn't fret too much, especially if you can find pleasure in other ways.

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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quote:
I also feel that as fingers are more pointy they will more readily poke around uncomfortably, or painfully, whereas a penis (or penis shaped object) may only feel uncomfortable or hurt if not properly prepared. In my case anyway.
Just to be clear on this overall, we actually have far more control over our fingers per how we use them, degree of touch, etc. than penises or objects have. So fingers or hands most certainly do not have to be more pokey, and penises certainly CAN feel that way. Doesn't depend so much on the body part, but how it's used.

That said, to be clear on something else, if it feels good to have ANYTHING inserted/taken into the vagina depends a whole lot on if female-bodied people are relaxed, not nervous, highly aroused and really WANT that, and not for a purpose, say, for the idea they need to "loosen up," but because it feels good and feels like what they want.

As well, the vagina does not have a static level of "tightness" or "looseness" for the most part (especially before childbirth) that one can change by engaging in any kind of sexual activities. How right or loose the vagina feels changes from day to day, even minute to minute sometimes, and inserting fingers or penises will not change that in any way permanently.

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rambly_rosa
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I can definitely relate to this... when I started masturbating, each new limit I pushed felt a little scary and uncomfortable at first, until I became truly ready and comfortable with the act. I think it's best to not worry, and not try to push yourself to do things that hurt or don't feel good - instead, focus on the things that DO feel good...

Like a lot of people have said, you don't necessarily need to penetrate yourself to masturbate. At least in my experience, sometimes I desire penetration, and my body responds to reflect that. Other times, I really don't desire it - and my body definitely doesn't respond very well if I try to force things!

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naplement
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well i used to have problems with my hymen too when reaching inside, but the vagina itself was loose and comfortable from the first time on, it even sucked air inside sometimes [Razz] . I don't think that it would depend of "practice", neither, just arousal..

is it tight just at the opening, or all over?

Posts: 124 | From: hungary | Registered: Mar 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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