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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » Buying Sanitry Pads / Tampons With Your Partener

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Author Topic: Buying Sanitry Pads / Tampons With Your Partener
Natasha89
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Wether this is the best place to put this im not sure, but i was thinking today am i alone in thinking what i am.

My Partener is coming over to mine at 7pm because this morning i asked if he could drive me over to tesco tonight to go buy some "girly things" because ive ran out. I was even shy to write in the text i need pads. (!)
But i cant quiet figure out why ive spent the past hour trying to think of how to go shopping and go buy them with him standing beside me.
Im embaressed but why? I can't figure it out.
I'd quiet happy go buy everything else with him even underware, i mean he's held me while i've cried because of period pain, he's been there while i've stayed at his an bleed on his bedsheets and he didn't even bat a eye lid.
Also why am I thinking what his impression will be when i pick up pads and not the tampons? Because part of me thinks he thinks i use tampons.. will he be shocked at this?

Am i the only girl in the world that is embarassed by such a natural thing?

[ 04-28-2006, 11:53 AM: Message edited by: Natasha89 ]

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KittenGoddess
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Don't worry about it. I've found that few men (at least in my experience) have given much thought to what feminine products women use. So I doubt that he'll have any "impression" based on whether you purchase pads or tampons.

If you're uncomfortable with him standing there when you pick out products, then just send him somewhere else. Maybe you could ask him to get some soda or toothpaste for you while you get your stuff. Or just ask him to go look at the magazines or something. To be quite honest, my partner HATES to stand there with me while I shop for period products. It's not that either of us are bothered by the products...he just gets bored really quickly while I'm trying to make a decision. So it's no big deal to send him to look at other stuff. [Smile]

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Sarah Liz

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oOo Lea oOo
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Same here! In fact, my boyfriend insists that he go check out "manly stuff". We walk in together, go our separate ways, and meet up at the check out station. If he doesn't get any thing, he waits by the door. Honestly, sweetie, I wouldn't sweat it! [Wink]

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likewhoa19
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I don't know Natasha, but I feel like according to the things you wrote about your boyfriend is really understanding about female biology, especially as far as young guys go. I think tampon-commercials are unfortunate, when they talk about pads being like diapers and all that, and I wonder if that's what some of that negative association with pads is coming from. But really, tampons haven't been around all that long, and pads are safer (less infection, no chance of TSS). So I think if you can get over your own embarassment, I'd bet based on your boyfriend's handling of other aspects of menstruation, he'll be totally cool with the pads thing. And yeah, otherwise if you have other stuff to buy you can always be like "would you go look for ___ for me?" and then you can go pick out your "girly thing."
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Natasha89
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well it didnt go at all like i thought it would to be truely honest.
I did as kittengodess had wrote before i even read what she put, i just asked if he would liek to go somewhere and he said that he would rather be by me so if he goes shopping again he can pick up the brand i use incase i need any.
The commercial prospect of things he thinks are ridiculous because he said to me once that why does a woman need to know how they work when they have leaflets inside or demostrations.

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likewhoa19
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ahh -so sweet =)
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DarkChild717
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quote:
Originally posted by likewhoa19:
I think tampon-commercials are unfortunate, when they talk about pads being like diapers and all that, and I wonder if that's what some of that negative association with pads is coming from. But really, tampons haven't been around all that long, and pads are safer (less infection, no chance of TSS).

Actually, the precedent for woman-negative adveristing stretches back over 100 years. This is not a new phenomena. I'd also like to point out that tampons are indeed quite old. They were in use far before the applicator was invented and patented in 1936.

Part of the association with pads is that early on, they were reusable, and only those with money could afford disposable products like tampons. This is actually where the term, "on the rag" came from, because women used to literally use rags for their menstrual flow.

More on topic, my boyfriend bought me my last box of tampons, because they happened to be on sale when we were at that store. He pays more attention to my cycle than I do, actually. I rely on him to figure out when it's due.

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likewhoa19
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I knew about the rags -I just meant that I got the impression a negative association w/ pads vs. tampons would be fairly recent. I know it used to be that virgins were discouraged from using tampons, even. And the only reason I could think of for why now there is more of a negative association w/ pads is b/c tampon companies portray pads in a negative light in order to sell their own product. Are you disagreeing?
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DarkChild717
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Nope, that's pretty much it. But tampon adds only make up about half of the adverts. The other half are indeed advertising the comfort and safety of pads.

But both campaigns use negativity to sell their products.

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Natasha89
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You learn something new everyday. I never knew tampons were an old thing, i remember watching a victorian programme an seeing the whole thing of the pad being cloth and they hand washed them, but i wasnt aware the tampon was old. I thought it was a modern 80's / 90's thing.. evidently im wrong.
Does the tampon advert meantioned about tss? or anything like that?
i wont go to the extereme to say the adverts for sanitry devices are propaganda but when you purcahse the product its very rarely as comfort like an cotton like feeling or even easy to use as they protray it.

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logic_grrl
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As far as I can find out, the first commercial tampons date from the 1930s.

So they've been around for a while (although not as long as pads, since the evidence seems to be that women have been using washable cloth pads throughout recorded history, with disposable pads being invented in the late 19th century).

Interestingly, the first commercial menstrual cups also seem to date from the 1930s, so they're pretty much as old as tampons.

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Natasha89
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You know i dont know if its not a UK thing but i have never seen a advert about menstrual cups, lunapads or anything like that.
Im not even sure they are available to buy in the UK.
But whao 1930's i wonder if they looked anything like they do now back then.

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logic_grrl
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Yup, menstrual cups and washable pads are available in the UK.

In fact, there's a UK-made silicone menstrual cup, the Mooncup, which is even stocked in some branches of Boots The Chemists:

http://www.mooncup.co.uk/

(No, they don't pay me [Big Grin] - I just think they're fabulous.)

By the way, if you're curious or interested, "Sexual Health and Medicine" has a bunch of threads on cups and other alternative menstrual options, with info and people's experiences - they're linked in the forum FAQ.

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"Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it." - the Talmud

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Natasha89
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Your a star!
They should pay you [Big Grin]
Ill pop over there now an have a read

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summergoddess
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My partner and I have gone together to buy tampons or pads. He has gotten a few of them on his own before for me and he isn't embarrassed by them.

I figure if a couple can go to a store to buy condoms, they should be able to go together for girly things or even men things.

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DarkChild717
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There's some evidence of internal menstural "things" being used by the Egyptians. The next reference I found was a Fax Tampon ad for 1930. 29 cents for a full pack! Hot dog!

Current ads make no mention of TSS, but when you buy the packs they include a pamphlet.

If you're really interested in more of this stuff, I can't recommend enough the Museum of Menstruation--it's fabulous, and they recently redesigned their site. Check it out!

[ 04-29-2006, 06:05 PM: Message edited by: DarkChild717 ]

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Caylin, Scarleteen Volunteer
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Natasha89
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Interesting site i have book marked it too look at much better when im awake im so tired been travelling all weekend
29cents for a full pack seems interesting seein as what is paid for now

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