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Author Topic: kissing x_x
Jake ^-^
Member # 37742

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i'm 14
and i haven't had my first kiss yet =x
i feel abnormal because all the guys in my class talk about like making out with their girlfriends and stuff =\
and the idea of kissing anyone kind of freaks me out... it makes me have a sick feeling in my stomach
i just feel so immature compared to them :S
i haven't been in a relationship with anyone and i'm a bit of a loner >.>;

by the way, what age do you think it's "normal" to have your first kiss? i know that theres no normal... but i feel so confused and weird

please help~
thank you so much guys 'u'


jake :]

Posts: 4 | From: new york | Registered: Mar 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 35890

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It's totally not out of the ordinary to never have been kissed at your age, or to have not yet been in a relationship. Because it's something new/not something you have experienced before, it's bound to make you feel a bit nervous thinking about it. But honestly, it's not a big deal at all. It does not mean that you are not mature, nor does it mean that you are weird or anything like that. It's really not something you need to stress over.

And you're right, there is no "normal". Some people have their first kisses around age eight or nine, and some may not have theirs until their late teens. It's just something that varies from person to person. No biggie. [Smile]

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"A wise man should consider that health is the greatest of human blessings, and learn how by his own thought to derive benefit from his illnesses." -Hippocrates

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Hulder Folke
Member # 37016

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Not strange at all. I was seventeen when I received my first kiss. I'd already had two boyfriends, and had a number of boys and girls who were interested in me. The kiss was from an ex boyfriend who was interested in me, but whose feelings I didn't reciprocate.
I just wasn't interested in that sort of thing yet. And that was fine with me. So that's normal. Kissing at 14's normal, kissing at 12 is, kissing at 17 or even 21 is too (I had a good friend who waited that long.) And girls can be late to show interest in any kind of physical or sexual activity as well.

So cheer up. 14's younger than you think. [Smile]

Posts: 8 | From: Cleveland, OH | Registered: Feb 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 37104

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yup, I was 18 when I had my first kiss and I don't think it is abnormal
Oh...and as a side note, waiting for your first kiss to actually just happen instead of forcing it may get rid of some of the awkwardness you are anticipating.
I know I was scared of not knowing what to do or being awkward, but when I had my first kiss it was no big deal, perhaps because we were both older.
Don't stress about it, it is more common than you think [Smile]

[ 05-01-2008, 10:16 AM: Message edited by: thisismyscreenname ]

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Member # 37973

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Whenever you're ready.
I (technically) had my first kiss when I was 16 in a game of spin-the-bottle. I had my first "real" kiss when I was 18. Don't worry about it.

Posts: 28 | From: A building | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 38197

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My first kiss was when I was 17, and beforehand I shared a lot of the same reactions to the idea. It's wet, it's unsanitary, it's messy, it's just too close for comfort, right?

But when it actually happened, it was with someone who made it seem not revolting. Now, it wasn't very good (as it was his first kiss as well), and didn't give too much pleasure but after a few weeks we found what we both like—now it's not stomach-turning or uncomfortable, it's just something like holding hands that we've figured out.

Don't feel bad, you just haven't found anyone worth kissing yet. You're not immature, you're just impatient!

Posts: 3 | From: Los Angeles | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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There's no normal age for a first kiss...

My first kiss was when I was 17... And I was repulsed by it at first, because logically it seemed unsanitary... Then the day after I had my first kiss I contracted one of the worst sore throats I've ever had which put me off kissing for a good month...
I still don't kiss with tongue because it just turns my stomach, but it's about finding someone who feels the same about those things.

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Typical Young and Dumb Teenager?
Member # 37530

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My first real kiss was last August or September; I was still fourteen at the time. Before this, I was three in something like a pre-school kissing the same boy, but like I said, I was three. Oddly enough, I too grew to be one to believe kissing was unsanitary and flat-out unheatly, especially seeing as I have a slight, out of control case of OCD [Wink] , but I am now sexually active. So, I guess some people simply wait longer than others to experience diffent forms of sexuality. For instance, I have a friend who is 15 and has never kissed a girl, but at the same time, I have another guy friend, who just made 16, that made out with multiple girls when he was nine. The second guy has a gay brother and a bi sister, who are between one to two years older than him, who are both sexually active; whereas, he is not, and doesnt plan to be until marriage. So, dont sweat it; believe me, there are plenty of other things you will have to worry about than kissing, and when it happens, let it. Until then, just be patient, and dont focus so much on "when".

You may find my first kiss incident in a sense calming and/or funny:
Well, I started dating this guy I have known since I was three, the same one I kissed is pre-school. A month or two passed and we kissed for the first time. I was extremely nervous though; it's like I didnt see it coming and then it just happened. We were at a party, alcohol was being distributed, he had a beer or two, I had not; we were cuddling on a couch and then he (my boyfriend) kind of just leaned over and 'smooch'. Being so nervous though, and over analyzing the situation, especially since it was my first kiss, I wasnt sure if we were about to make out of what. So, I stuck my tounge out, as if I knew what to do, and accidently licked the side of his face. Then right afterwards he was like "did you just lick my face?" and I had no idea what to tell him. I just buried my face in his chest. Still to this day we laugh about what happened. Point being, even if your first kiss is what you imagine or hope it to be, when it happens, it's okay; after a while, it wont be much different than holding a girl's hand or flirting.

Good luck. [Smile]

[ 05-01-2008, 11:58 PM: Message edited by: Typical Young and Dumb Teenager? ]

Young and Dumb.
"Life is a balance of holding on and letting go." - Keith Urban

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i had my first kiss when i was 12...oh and how I regret don't rush into things, wait until you feel ready...screw what seems to be the social norm
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I had my first kiss when I was 8, but that wasn't with toungues or anything. My first like kiss with a toungue and everything was when I was 13.

I was READY when I had my first kiss I was ready. Its all about being mentally ready for something, you can't just rush into something or you will regret it. I am 14 NOW and I already rushed into oral sex, and I was NOT ready for that yet. You really should just ignore what other people are doing. WHO CARES ABOUT WHAT 'EVERYONE' ELSE IS DOING??? It really doesn't matter! Focus on yourself!


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Ah, first kisses [Wink] We were both 16. After he mustered up the courage to nervously ask (had he not asked that night, I would have!) if I wanted to go out with him and I enthusiastically said yes, we leaned in with lips puckered and eyes squeezed shut--and missed [Big Grin] We've been going out for almost ten months, sharing many more kisses since. We still laugh about it, and that night is one of my fondest memories [Smile]

“I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.” --John Waters

Posts: 206 | From: Bay Area, CA | Registered: Oct 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Your not that strange Im 14 as well, and Ive never had a first kiss yet. And there is no normal age, it all depends on the person.

War. War never changes...

Posts: 8 | From: FL | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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I was 13 or 14.. but my best friend is 20 and hasn't kissed anyone.. you are right to say there is no normal or right age.. as long as you feel comfortable with the idea, and it's special, not just like on a dare or something. There's nothing wrong with that way either, but it will just be more special if it is with someone you really want to kiss.
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I had my first kiss at 16, but I was in a relationship. I'm almost 17 now. It just felt right when it happened, so it was a good experience for me.
Posts: 39 | From: Misourri | Registered: Jul 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Probably more than half of the people I know had their first kiss at 16 or 17, or are about that age and haven't yet. It varies pretty widely. There have been people on these boards asking if they were abnormal for not having kissed a girl at 19, or 21, and the answer was still no, so don't worry about it!

Also, do consider the possibility that some of the guys in your class talking about making out with their girlfriends are exaggerating, not to mention that the ones who are talking are louder on the subject so the other guys your age who haven't kissed a girl and don't want to lie about having done so are much easier to overlook.


The highest result of education is tolerance. -Helen Keller

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dont worry about it... i never had my first kiss or even dated till i was in college. dont rush force things... they are best when they happen naturally.
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Hey Jake [Smile]
well there isnt a certain/ normal age to kiss, when you meet that right person no matter WHAT age you are, you'll know its worth it [Smile]
dont listen to what other people say, its your life! you do what you want with it! If you dont like kissing then its completely fine.

do you see yourself ever kissing someone in the future?

My first kiss was at age 14!

Posts: 43 | From: KW. | Registered: Dec 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Don't worry about it! I didn't even have a boyfriend when I was in high school! (Because I was a bit of a loner too [Razz] ) I had my first kiss (and boyfriend) when I was 19. Two years later we're still dating. So don't fret if you think you think you're a "loner". I promise you'll get your first kiss!

Posts: 32 | From: Santa Monica, CA | Registered: May 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Jake, you really shouldn't worry about it, I had my first kiss when I was 18, a little over a month ago, with my first and current girlfriend.

Personally, I'm perfectly happy with the way things turned out in regards to this.

It's not any better or worse necessarily than anyone who had their first kiss, or a variety of other firsts, sooner or later than me, but it is what worked for me, and I'm glad it happened the way it did.

One thing I can say for certain is that it's not important what you do, when you do it, or how you do it, but who you do it with. ^_^

(So much sexual innuendo, well, I guess that's the point anyway...)

Chin up and face the future, wonders beyond your wildest dreams await us!

Posts: 47 | From: Crescent city, CA. | Registered: Jul 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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