Hi again. I was reading an article in my school's newspaper today. The author of the article was discussing his suffering with depression. As I was reading it, I noticed that nearly everything he listed is something that I experience as well. I've often "joked" to my boyfriend about being depressed, especially lately because of the recent move and starting at a new (bigger) campus. Some of the symptoms that the guy had, that I have also experienced (and normally do on a day-to-day basis) are: -feeling like everyone is saying or thinking something negative about me -feeling like everyone who parties or drinks are "living lives of debauchery", though secretly envying how social they are -staying kept up in the house, doing nothing but watching tv or surfing the net to pass time -being a bit short tempered -sleeping a lot more than usual and feeling tired a lot despite getting plenty of sleep
there are more things, but I've had everything he said he had, short panic attacks. I have never had the urge to hurt myself. I also tend to avoid situations where there are a lot of people, and make no efforts to meet new people. And, in reference to previous concerns about lack of libido, could depression be a cause for that? The author of the article said he had mild depression, but he WAS diagnosed as depressed and talked to psychiatrists and was on medications to help with anxiety. This might sound like a stupid question, but would you suggest that I see someone about it based on my similar symptoms with someone who has been diagnosed as depressed? Sorry this was so long..
Well- This is just me, but I think it would be a good idea to take a step back from the Hunt For An Official Diagnosis mentality, and just take an honest look at how you feel. Remember that psychologists don't exactly take CAT scans when they diagnose depression: they ask questions to arbitrarily help a person identify their own mental and emotional status.
Rather than going through a checklist of highly specific, concrete things, just ask yourself this: Are you having a long-term case of the blues that's interfering with your ability to live, happily, as you normally would?
We all have to experience negative emotions, from grief to anger to sorrow. Frankly, because life happens. Depression, however, is a feeling of being down, sad, apathetic, that sticks around, and doesn't seem to want to go away. Sometimes it is started by our reaction to a single negative event; sometimes there is no trigger. Other times, a long-term stressful situation may cause it, which means that the person suffering the depression might have to fight off their depression while that stressful situation is still around.
If you're constantly feeling down, and are struggling with feeling happy even when good things are happening, you might want to go to a campus counselor or something similar and talk. Hopefully, you're able to sit down with yourself and realize it if the quality of your life is not what you know it could be (or want it to be), due to burdensome negative emotions or--as is often the case with depression--a seeming inability to feel positive emotions, or to feel them strongly.
You already seem worried that depression may be an issue, so it could not hurt to sit down with a pro and discuss it. If nothing else, you can walk away with some great coping skills for AVOIDING depression, and some wonderful insight into how you can identify it when it happens.
Posts: 213 | From: Private | Registered: Feb 2006
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Don't feel too bad. I've got a similar problem. I attend school with about 2000 others, crammed into the little halls, and I am terribly self-conscious. I have bad self-esteem issues; I feel like everyone is staring at me, and every little movement I make is being judged by them. I avert eye contact from anyone, and try not to even look at people. In the back of my mind, I'm always checking my self, on my posture and what not. To make matters much,much worse, when I get nervous (which I always am) I begin to sweat, and that just increases my paranoia, because I find it disgusting, which I know others do too. This in turn makes me even MORE nervous, which just creats a perpetual cycle of anxiety. Not too sure of this relevance of this, but it's always good to vent, and at least you know you aren't alone. P.S: Gotta love the internet for allowing people to come post things like this...I would never say this to anyone in person ( ) Further edit: I too am constantly tired, I never wake up feeling renewed, I'm always sleepy and aching. It just makes me want to stay home and do nothing all day. I miss a LOT of school simply because I won't get out of bed, and it feels like the weekends are all that keeps you (well, me) sane.
Yeah I definitely know how you feel. I've thought about it a lot and I truly believe that I'm not "clinically" depressed...I just go through periodic depressed episodes every now and again...ESPECIALLY if I'm going through something new and scary. Though I'm still not totally relaxed about everything (for instance, I still have self-esteem issues), I feel a little more comfortable in my new situation and I'm starting to get a routine going, which helps me feel better.
And YES! Bless the internet for allowing people to vent about issues that sometimes aren't so easy to vent!
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