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Author Topic: Periods and boyfriends
Pippa
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Hi,

I just wondered how you guys felt about being on when your boyfriend is with you?

I get terribly self-conscious about my period, mainly because I'm really heavy and have to wear thick nightime pads. I really hate it if my boyfriend sees or touches my pad(accidentally or whatever) and I will do anything to hide the fact that I'm wearing a pad from him!

If he ever comes into the room when I'm changing a pad I make him turn away and not look, and when I'm getting into bed at night I wear a long nightie so he can't see anything at all!! If we're having a cuddle and his hands start to wander near my knickers I always shove his hand away as I can't bear the thought of him touching my pad. Maybe I'm being silly? But I can't help it.

I do feel quite horny though when I'm on and even though I would never have sex when I'm on my period, if I'm on my own I will (embarrassed about this!) often play with myself through my pad and reach an orgasm [Eek!]

I always do this on my own though, never when my boyfriend is around.

How do you guys feel about all this - or am I the only one?

Pippa

XXX.

Posts: 4 | From: Sussex, UK | Registered: Jul 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lexie
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Since I've had my implanon inserted I have irregular bleeding and spotting. My boyfriend doesnt like it, but he likes sex more, so we still have sex when I have spotting/bleeding, we try and avoid it when its heavy.. or if I have cramps, and we generally use a condom to try and keep it a bit cleaner. But overall i dont think he cares THAT MUCH.

I'm not embarrassed by it, nor do I feel uncomfortable with him knowing, or touching me when I have it, its a perfectly natural process that I can't help, we are very open about sex and my period, I feel that its part of accepting me as a person, although I could understand someone not being comfortable with sex or touching you at that time, but for it to be a point of embarrassment i find a little odd.

And just so you know, there is nothing wrong with having sex on your period, medically, as long as you are still careful using barrier methods - having your period doesnt prevent pregnancy or sti's. But of course, if you arent comfortable with it then by all means dont do it.

There is nothing wrong with masturbating, at any point of your cycle. And I can sympathise with the heavy periods...

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Rina
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My boyfriend gets frustrated when I'm on my period because even though I'm always horny, I never want to have sex on my period. I just can't do it. I'm weird that way. However, I will masturbate when I'm alone during my period, and I'm fine with us messing around [even him playing with my clit when I wear tampons], so idk. I'm strange I guess. lol

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Madwomen seldom think they're crazy.

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KittenGoddess
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Periods, menstrual products, and the like really don't bother my partner in the least. As far as he's concerned, it's another bodily function that I happen to be capable of but he's not. He knows that women menstruate (he had a mom & a sister...and you don't really grow up in a house with women and know nothing about periods and pads). Heck, everybody knows that women menstruate and that various products are necessary during that time (even if you managed to miss that day in health class, it'd be hard to miss the Tampax and Always commercials on TV).

In my own case, I also happen to be married to & living with my partner, so it's pretty difficult to avoid all things period related when you're sharing space with someone 7 days a week. He'll take my washable pads out of the dryer for me when they get done with the other wash. We even laugh about my "little rubber cup" (Keeper) and the funny sounds it makes sometimes. That's not to say that he gets terribly excited about my having periods, but I guess it just doesn't phase him.

Is there a reason why you feel self-conscious about your period? Obviously we want you to feel comfortable with yourself and your partner. So anything that makes you uncomfortable is totally ok to avoid. However, if this is something that you'd like to talk about and work on, we certainly would be happy to talk with you about it.

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Sarah Liz

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DarkChild717
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My partner doesn't mind so much. The part I really have to be careful of is the occasional mood swings, of which can be directed him, and I need to watch myself to make sure I'm not saying something that I'd regret later.

That said, he has noooooo problem with my period. None at all.

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Master_Of_Puppets
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I've always felt very 'friendly' before and during my period. However, I'm not really sure if I'm ready to jump right in and have sex during my period...I'm not afraid to or anything, I know that sex whilst on your time of the month isn't any different than regular sex at any other time. Some people are a bit scared that bloods going to splatter onto the walls or something....which is silly. I'm only poking a bit of fun BTW.

The thing that sort of bothers me is that in order to have sex while I'm on my period it would have to be planned out and everything...otherwise I'd have to go and pull out my tampon, clean up a little, you know? Just make sure everything's fresh. Its a sure mood killer in my opinion. However, I might be self concious. I'll find out what he minds some day but at the moment its more of a "don't ask, don't tell, just be aware" deal. I'm not stupid and he isn't either, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out when some girls are on their period...granted some hide it well, but one way or another there are signs that point it out.

[ 07-24-2007, 01:16 AM: Message edited by: Master_Of_Puppets ]

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Rina
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quote:
Originally posted by Master_Of_Puppets:

The thing that sort of bothers me is that in order to have sex while I'm on my period it would have to be planned out and everything...otherwise I'd have to go and pull out my tampon, clean up a little, you know? Just make sure everything's fresh. Its a sure mood killer in my opinion.

Definitely. That's pretty much my issue.

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Madwomen seldom think they're crazy.

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-Lauren-
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My partner is decidedly squicked out by all blood and firmly believes it has no place in a sexual setting. I can deal, but I'm not gonna lie in that it makes me feel a little self-conscious sometimes. Using a menstrual cup has been a godsend for me in that regard; I love it not only for comfort, but because it gives truly invisible, leak-proof protection. The cleanliness is awesome, especially without the tell-tale string.

In shopping for a non-hormonal birth control option in which I struggled between the copper IUD or diaphragm, I'm going with the diaphragm exactly because of the benefit of mess-free (well, less so) intercourse in addition to contraceptive protection. [Smile]

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papou_fruit
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Don't worry! You're not an oddball out. [Smile]
I get unusually aroused more often during my period, and it sort of frustrates me in a way. XD

My boyfriend is fine about it, but even though we've been together for 4 years, I always change my pad in the bathroom, I'd never want him to see anything like that, I'd be too embarassed.~
But yes, when I'm wearing a pad or mensturating, at night I wear wool pajama pants or something opposed to undies or shorts, it's just my sort of preference. Frankly he's actually fine with me getting my period because that means I'm not pregnant [Smile]

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Yasmin
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Right before my boyfriend and I even started dating, we were walking to a café alone, and I was on the phone with my mom asking her to buy me tampons because I was about to start my period.

So I've always been pretty open with him about my period. He understands it's completely natural and that it really does make me feel like crap. It's never a huge deal, and he likes knowing when I've started so he can deal with the mood swings and also just know not to touch me in certain places. Like I said, it's completely natural and we're not weird or awkward with it.

But with my ex, one time I was wearing his jacket while I was on my period, and I had some tampons in there because I had to use the bathroom. When I got back I gave him back his jacket, I forgot to take the tampons out, and he just freaked out when he found them. Pretty immature to me.

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cool87
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I don't have sex with my boyfriend when I'm on my period (given I have some problems with seeing blood during sex) although I'm okay with just cuddling or other stuff like that. I don't masturbate either when I'm on my period. The blood is, to be simple, kinda a turn-off for me in that setting. And I just haven't yet set my mind on buying a menstrual cup or any other products beside pads so I would obviously have to deal with blood during those activities. But my sex drive is generally never really sky high--not even very high-- when I'm on my period and my current partner is okay with not having sex on my period so it's no biggie, really. I just don't have sex when I'm on it.

As for periods in general, my partner is totally fine with it (and I like it that way ! [Smile] ) and I'm not shy about it or anything. It's not ackward or taboo, it is simply a totally normal thing for us both.

[ 07-30-2007, 08:22 PM: Message edited by: cool87 ]

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Live_Laugh_Love
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I always feel more in the mood while I'm on my period too. Frustrating. I don't think my bf feels too awkward regarding my period. I just happen to be a very private person by nature, so I don't even talk about it with my mom all that openly, let alone my bf. And if I'm staying at his place while I'm on my period, I'm not embarrassed or weird about telling him that I am or that I'm wearing a pad, but I don't like him getting near it with his hands..just weirds me out.

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:)

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summergoddess
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My partner and I are married and living together. We've been together as a couple for little over six years now. My husband is comfortable with having sex with me when I'm menstruating. We don't care that it's more messy than normal... If we're wanting each other, we don't care that the blood is there. He's bought tampons for me on occasional basis. My husband is very comfortable. If anything, I am at my most horniest when that time of the month is here and he loves that [Smile]

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~Jules

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Pippa
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Hi Guys,

Thanks for all your replies - very helpful!

Does anyone else wear 'special' knickers when they're on? They've very unsexy but I like my white cotton sloggis hi-legs with lycra when I'm on as they're really stretchy and hold my pad nice and snuggy. I'm not normally a big pants girls but I kind of need the extra size to hold the pads I use because they are quite big.

Pippa
XXX.

PS I know it's naughty but it kind of teases my b/f too cos he can see my pad through them [Embarrassed]

[ 09-05-2007, 07:05 AM: Message edited by: Pippa ]

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devlevgre
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when im on mine, we just do other sexual activities not involving down there(soo..brest stuff)...it helps relive sexual frustration and makes for hotter sex after its done
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Moscowsnow
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When I first brought up the subject of periods with my boyfriend, he commented that he didn't care at all, as long as I warned him "when I was about to have it".

That seemed kind of an odd thing to say, so I questioned him a bit more, and it turned out he thought periods lasted for about ten minutes.

Needless to say, he's somewhat more educated on the subject now. Private boys' boarding schools have a lot to answer for. *rolls eyes*

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run_for_fun
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about the knickers, i dont wear special ones, but at night when im using a pad, i tend to put on a pair of spandex running shorts, like bun huggers, or volleyball shorts. and then wear my gym shorts or whatever.

Lol my last boyfriend and even my guy friends are completely cool about periods.

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