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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » to swallow or not to swallow

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Author Topic: to swallow or not to swallow
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 22756

Icon 1 posted      Profile for kitka     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I'm skewering Shakespeare... it's late.

What's the psychological issue/s with some men wanting women to swallow during oral sex? Is it a power play? Does it make them feel more accepted by their partner on a multitude of levels, physical and emotional?

I also occasionally feel odd- not selfish, however - that he swallows constantly when he gives me oral sex - yet I'm not 'reciprocating' that aspect. This I don't get.

I've tried his semen & it's very bitter. He says he doesn't expect/want me to swallow if I don't want to do it and that it doesn't upset him. Fine by me... but it still does make me feel odd at times.

Posts: 455 | From: New York, NY | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 30731

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dont do it if you don't want to!!!!! its as simple as that, i can't see how this is an 'erotic' act or anything cos i cant imagine its at all pleasant! most men probably don't mind since (judging on the majority, not all boys and men are like this!) most men prefer things which they enjoy, seeing some one they love suffer probably isnt one of fthose things,
hope this helps, D.

Posts: 30 | From: cambridge | Registered: Sep 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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I'd be inclined to agree with sarge24, but I understand (sort of) why some guys like it when their partner swallows. I didn't swallow the first time I gave my boyfriend oral, but the second time, I did, and he was blown away! He said it was really hot... I don't know, I think a lot of it is the acceptance thing, and also maybe the "porn fantasy" to a small extent: in a lot of porn movies (I think) the women are shown swallowing semen.
That said, I don't mind the taste of my boyfriend's semen - not particularly fond of it, but it's definitely bearable - so that's a non-issue for me. Pretty much, if you don't enjoy it and if your partner is cool with you not swallowing, I'd say you're fine with whatever you're doing now.

So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky
As someone told me lately
Everyone deserves the chance to fly

Posts: 365 | From: DC | Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 25983

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From what I've gathered, men sometimes have the same insecurities about their sexual fluids as some women do. Swallowing is maybe a confirmation that everything's A-OK. I've also read an (obviously biased) article that states that lots of men liken avoiding ejaculating in the mouth/swallowing to withdrawal in that it's not as fulfilling. So basically, once again the assumption that any sex act should include and end with ejaculation.

I'd say to ditch the guilt, kitka. It's pretty rare to be in a sexual relationship where you agree to/like everything, and it's pretty common for the person you're with to like one or more of the things you don't. It shouldn't be a debilitatingly big deal to anybody; there are lots of enjoyable ways to follow up.

I don't prefer to swallow ejaculate either (when I'm in the mood for oral sex, at all) simply because I can't stand the thickness. I have enough sinus problems without trying to work that in. Your boyfriend wouldn't swallow or even go down on you at all if he didn't enjoy it (or so I hope).

Posts: 4636 | From: USA/Northern Europe | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 94

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And of course everyone reading this thread should remember that exchaning fluids through oral sex, whether your are male or female, contains a significant STI risk, so Scarleteen highly recommends using condoms and dental dams at least until you and your partner have been monogamous for six months and been tested for STIs twice.
Posts: 2710 | From: Australia | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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