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Author Topic: weight
Member # 29292

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I tought I could make a topic about weight. There used to have one way back then but it's old so..

Here are some questions.

Are you guys happy about your weight ? Are you an healthy weight or are you overweight or obese ? Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ? Are you trying to loose weight ? Does being overweight affects your self-esteem ?Do you often compare your weight to others ?

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Hey, cool!

While we really appreciate focusing on positve body aspects, weight isn't one of them. In reality, it's an arbitrary number that means very little in terms of health and happiness.

Let's try and keep this thread body positive. [Smile]

[ 07-07-2006, 09:06 PM: Message edited by: DarkChild717 ]

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In addition, a thread like this, however well meaning, could be more trouble than it's worth in terms of triggering those of us with eating disorders, I think.
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I actually think we can ask these questions: after all, users here come asking a whole lot about losing weight, about their weight, and often the conversations do end up trying to address where the pressure to even think about it so much comes from.

(It just might be worth including a discussion about where one even gets the numbers to determine what is and is not "overweight.")

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Originally posted by Miz Scarlet:
(It just might be worth including a discussion about where one even gets the numbers to determine what is and is not "overweight.")

Heh, you know Miz S, this reminds me of the old philosophical debate topic about the pile of beans. At which point does the pile become a heap? Is it at 200 beans? 250? Same thing with weight - what makes X many pounds overweight, while X-1 isn't? Does that one pound literally mean the difference between overweight and not overweight? It does seem very arbitrary.

Unlucky at cards; lucky at love.

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I personally define being overweight as having more body fat than is typical or necessary for normal function of the human body at a given size. But I agree with you, wobblyheadedjane, that a couple pounds or so shouldn't classify one as overweight.

I think I read somewhere (though I could be wrong) that medically, being overweight means being 20 or more pounds over one's ideal weight, and being obese is 50 or more.

Now, onto cool's questions.

Are you guys happy about your weight ?
It comes and goes. I hate so much that numbers can affect how people can feel about themselves. I've recently gotten more active and been doing weight training. I feel much more toned and healthy, by far.

But the thing is, I'm still psychologically put down when I step on the scale and see myself gaining weight, even though the logical part of my mind knows that's muscle gain and fat loss, and it shows on my body. I'm 5'4", and used to weigh 130. Now, after getting healthier, that number has climbed to 135. 130 just sounds better than 135 or 140, regardless of the health of the body, and that annoys me so much, even though I'm still technically at a healthy weight.

Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ? Are you trying to loose weight ?

I feel pressure to be thinner, but not thin. I shrugged off unrealistic expectations of a skeleton thin body long ago, and now just aim for better muscle tone and to feel healthy. I'm looking to lose excess fat, as opposed to weight, for my health.

Do you often compare your weight to others ?

I can't help to, sometimes. But I try to keep in mind all the horrible health affects these US models go through to obtain that weight. I try to keep in my mind all the time: healthy. Being that thin is not healthy, and can kill you. I'd rather have the "shame" of a few extra pounds as opposed to destroying my metabolism.

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Are you guys happy about your weight ?
Right now, yes. I don't think there is any reason for me to gain or loose weight right now.

Are you an healthy weight or are you overweight or obese ?
I'm a healthy weight. I eat what I want, when I want and I excersize fairly regularly. That seems to work for me.

Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ?
No, not anymore. I used to suffer from anorexia and weight was a big issue in my life, obviously. But I've learnt not to focus on it too much.

Are you trying to loose weight ?
Nope, and if I was I'd try to loose it the healthy way, more excersize.

Do you often compare your weight to others ?
Occasionally I do, it's just natural I guess but I think that even if I was someone elses size, I probably wouldn't be anymore or less happier than I am now.

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Are you guys happy about your weight ?

The fact that I'm not overweight or underweight makes me happy... it's my appearance that bothers me the most. I'm around 5'5 and weight approximately 124 lbs. Considering I used to weigh 145, I'm proud of myself for shedding those pounds but I'm still not 100% happy with the way I look. Some days I feel more confident than others.

Are you an healthy weight or are you overweight or obese ?

I'm at a healthy weight. I did a few different BMI tests to get an idea and I'm at a pretty good weight.

Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ?

Yes I do. Everytime I see a girl who's toned with a flat stomach, I feel a little jelous. I have a little bit of a belly and my upper legs could use some tightening up. I get teased about my belly... although it's always a lighthearted comment that I usually send right back, sometimes I feel aweful.

Are you trying to loose weight ?

No... I just continue with my regular routine... if I find myself eating a lot of junk, I'll eat some fruit and vegetables to balance it out. I lost a lot of weight last summer, and my family is always commenting on how small I am... although I would like to lose more weight, I'm not trying.

Does being overweight affects your self-esteem ?

When I was younger it didn't effect me at all. When I started losing weight at around the age of 15, I realized how big I was and how I want to be "like everyone else".

Do you often compare your weight to others ?

I do... if I see someone who I think looks really good, I find myself dwelling on my "flaws" and wishing I looked that "good."

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Are you guys happy about your weight?

Nope. At best I manage to not think about it at all, and every time it seems to be going down I'm delighted with that. But don't recall ever looking at scale and thinking "ok, that's about right".

Are you an healthy weight or are you overweight or obese?

I skate between slight underweight (medically speaking, still looks nothing like Hollywood thin) and normal.

Do you feel constant pressure to be thin?

Not so much outside pressure. I know that obsessing over weight isn't healthy, so I avoid beauty magazines and stuff, and point out politely to people that commenting on other's weight is rude and Not Done. Not even to tell me that I lost some. But while I can think straight, my feelings about the issue are still throughoutly illogical.

Are you trying to lose weight?

Mostly, or at least to not gain.

Does being overweight affects your self-esteem?

Well, I was a chubby kid. My parents never pointed it out and I was quite the tomboy, so I barely noticed, let alone cared. I lost the weight when I hit growth spurt in early teens, and noticed people's behavior towards me changed a lot. I quickly deduced that thin = good (and was told so by my peers) and figured that therefore thinner must be better. Enter a coupla years of trying to eat nothing at all and developing eating disorder. Whee. Ended up bingeing and got chubby again; and messed in the head to boot.

Luckily got really busy with studying and serious relationship and whatnot, so didn't have time for food obsession; next thing I knew I was nice and healthy again. Kept it like that for a while. Then got underweight due to stress, got a load of compliments and started trying to keep it that way, by any means. Caffeine, cigarettes, not eating. Here we go again. It makes me laugh when people say I look "healthy", when my cheeks are sunken and skin a weird yellow. Ppl trying to pressure others to lose weight usually insist they're concerned about their health, but while eating nutritious and getting exercise presumably is good for you, dieting sure as shock isn't.

Now gaining again; trying to pay attention to sane, nutritious food + exercize and avoid looking at the scale lest I freak out. Still, I can't help wishing I was underweight.

Usually keeping busy with other things and being happy helps against the food insanity; if I'm bored or upset there's likely a relapse.

Do you often compare your weight to others?

Surprisingly enough, not much. My idea of what I actually look like varies wildly and my body type is unusual around here; not easy to compare. On super-stupid days I might start to think something like "well, at least I'm thinner than..." but always catch myself and mentally slap myself for not just being idiot about weight but trying to congratulate myself for it, to boot. Mostly when it comes to other people I have no problem being body-acceptance positive; only my own weight bothers or even interests me.

I have no idea how it's possible to have internalized standard I *know* is stupid, this throughoutly.

I don't get even, I get odder

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I guess I'm happy with my weight, though sometimes I wish I could gain a bit. I'm at a healthy weight at 114 pounds and 5'5. No, I don't feel constant pressure to be thin, because I am slim. I am trying to gain weight, I want to get up to 123 pounds. And yes I do find myself constantly comparing my body to others, not weight. Not because I am unhappy with it, just curiosity really.

[ 07-19-2006, 10:22 AM: Message edited by: elektrikluv ]

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I used to feel too thin. People always compliment me on my slimness, but I'm freezing all the time and feel faint when I go too long without a snackable. But now that I've become comfortable with my body (whether or not it's thin), I've begun to gain a little weight (I'm now about 115 and 5'3"; hopefully more will come along). Funny how that works.
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Sorry - attack of the metrics [Cool] .
I'm 63 kilos and 1m80, so a bit skinny for my height. But I'm filling out a lot at the minute. And it's quite hard to go from skinny to more normal. I feel like I'm on the way to being fat a lot. Of course, I know I'm not, but change is hard. AndI get through that by trying my hardest not to give a damn. I'm going to wait for my body to stop messing me about constantly changing shape and THEN see how I feel about myself. Build more muscle? Lose a couple pounds?
To be honest, as long as I'm not seriously overweight, then I'm not fussed how my weight makes me LOOK, I just don't want to feel heavy, you know? I've always liked being very skinny, as much as I don't like my bony elbows. It's what I'm used to.
Basically, I intend to stay the same (apart from getting my acne blasted off the face of, well, me.) I couldn't love me any better, as bad as that sounds. I'm done worrying about me. Now I can focus on loving others. [Smile]

In a strange room, before you are emptied for sleep, what are you. And when you are filled with sleep you never were. I dont know what I am. I dont know if I am or not... how often have I lain beneath rain on a strange roof, thinking of home.

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To be honest I often wish that I weighed a good 30-or-so pounds MORE. I find myself wishing I had a voluptuous figure (BIG hips and thighs and whatnot and far more muscular arms) though mostly I'm satisfied with my body. I rarely think about how much I weigh but it's true that the preassure to be thin is staggering. I always feel insulted about comments on my weight since I'm so thin: my mother would constantly worry over me and interrogate me. ("Are you SURE you're not starving yourself? But you're so skinny!! Are you sure you're not making yourself throw up??")
You wouldn't walk up to what you would consider an overweight person and say, "Wow! You're so fat!" Thus I take equal offense whenever someone says to me, "Wow, you're so skinny!" If someone said to me, "wow, you look so healthy" I would appreciate that much better and deem it truthful.
I try to stamp out bad body image wherever I see it and whenever I hear a group of female friends complaining/worrying about their weight I try to help end this negativity (I mean, COME ON, there are far more important things to worry about than your weight, like your life. You could be using that extra time enjoying it instead of putting it down.)
However when I try to do this I always get comments like, "What do you know? You don't have to worry, you're thin!"
It's hard to be an advocate of healthy body image when through no fault of my own I happen to look like one beauty ideal (ONE, mind you) that society has determined is the ONLY beauty ideal. Ugh. . X(

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Gwaihir's response made me think of this:

So, so much of a person's healthy weight depends on their body shape which is an issue of genetics and NOT of being over or under weight, necessarily.

If you have a certain body frame based on your bones and muscle, you are naturally going to hold weight in a much different way than someone with a different frame.

For example, someone who is naturally built with a thinner frame (narrower shoulders, narrower hips, etc.) and who, through genetics, has a smaller bust size, is pretty much just not going to hold their weight in such a way that they would have full breasts and round, fuller hips. And based on how they gained the weight in the first place (if say it's fat-weight and not muscle-weight) it's more likely (and this is true of most, anyway) going to be held in the mid-section.

Just the same, someone with a wider body-frame (broader shoulders, wider hips) and/or who genetically will have a larger bust are going to NATURALLY carry more weight, and their healthiest will still probably not fit the unhealthy "ideal"

I, for one, am naturally very broad shouldered, don't have large hips, but do carry a lot of my normal weight in my behind, I could lose weight probably, but for how I'm built, it really wouldn't do much as far as the appearance of my figures goes, and I could gain weight, but depending to what extent it would probably only sit in my stomach and thighs, not my hips and breasts [Smile]

To veer back onto the original questions, I personally am probably more concerned with my weight than I should be, but really it's more due to the fact that while I was out of the country I had a much harder time eating well and geting as much refular exercise as I was doing normally before I left, so I put on some pounds and now am a pant-size bigger. But even so, I KNOW I'm within a perfectly healthy weight, visually it's really only noticable to ME (you're always your own worst critic), and I also know that once I get shifted back into my more healthy eating and exercise routine since I am home and am better able to do so, the extra pounds will probably shuff easily because I'll be living more healthily again. [Smile]

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I used to be very concerned about my weight and for about 6 months or so I would not eat lunch and avoid eating meals at home whenever I could. Then, I got over it because I realized that what I was doing wasn't good for me. I now weigh 112 and I'm 5'1. I wouldn't mind being a little thinner, the only part I don't like weight wise is my thighs but I've decided to just be comfortable with myself. At times I'll look at myself in the mirror and wish I was a couple pounds lighter but I don't do anything crazy. I've started being more active so now I've lost some weight in a healthy way. Now I've just decided that instead of focusing on a few numbers I'm just going to go by how I feel and right now I can that I've never felt better. I was always a pretty chubby kid so this is probably the best shape I've been in for a while.
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Are you guys happy about ur weight?
Right now i think i'm not i mean i don't really care about my weight its the way i look.
Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ?
Yes i do feel that pressure where i live itrs very hard i mean ppl watch u like omg why the hell does she look like that but i'm not that fat lol just a little extra skin.
Are you an healthy weight or are you overweight or obese ? I'm a little overweight but i think i'm healthy.
Are you trying to loose weight ? Actually yes i am .
Does being overweight affects your self-esteem ? yes it does more damage than i myself even realize sometimes but the thing is i can handle the pub;ic just not my family pressuring me about weight
Do you often compare your weight to others ? I alwasys wondering why couldn't i have had her flat stomach and get it in a healthy way .

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I find it sort of curious that so many girls who weigh in at around 110-125lbs wish they could be thinner. I used to weigh 155 at my heaviest (you could say I was a little chunky during pubery, due to my diet at the time - junk food!!!), but I had a fantastic phys ed teacher in grades 9 and 10 and before I knew it my body finally began to sort itself out for good. I lost around 15 lbs over those 2 years and I grew an inch taller (which is a great illusion to make you look that much thinner). I suddenly began to realize that I was looking and feeling a lot better than before. Over this summer I was ill with an infection and lost my appetite for aprox one the end of that week I was down another 8lbs and I now weigh 138lbs (give or take a lb depending on the day etc).

I understand that I'm not perfect, but no one has to be perfect to be wonderful. So - please don't agonize over silly things like a little excess fat. I sometimes wish I weighed a little more again even at 138. Being bulky can have its long as you're happy with yourself its okay. Judge yourself by happiness not the little numbers on the scale.

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I'm not particularly unhappy with my weight, but I am a bit with my body composition - I wish I were more muscle. I've been working on it, lifting weights, running, etc., so hopefully some changes will start happening. I don't really have a "target weight"... I'm somewhere between 120 and 125 at the moment, and really my goal is just to be able to wear a bikini confidently. A few years ago I was on the verge of anorexia, so I'm doing my very best to watch out for the warning signs of that and to stop myself if I lean towards the edge. One good thing is that I've recently started in university, and I'm walking a LOT more, and eating (for the most part) healthier than I did at home. And I didn't bring a scale, so I can't be obsessive about weighing myself like I used to be - weighed myself upwards of 10 times daily, it was REALLY unhealthy. But yeah, I think it's pulling together. And a lot of my hobbies are motion-oriented, so that's good too, plus my boyfriend is incredibly active so I have to move a lot to keep up with him. Hopefully the results of my efforts will show soon...

So if you care to find me
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As someone told me lately
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I don't ever weigh myself. I'm happy with my body and take care of it... the numbers on the scale aren't going to tell me anything useful.

I know I'm not overweight or underweight. As I said I take care of myself- work out regularly, eat as best I can, get regular doctor check ups, etc.

I do feel a pressure to be thin, especially considering the atmosphere of perfectionism at my college. There are a lot of girls here with eating disorders. It's really sad. I don't even find thinness to be particularly attractive, but I do sometimes feel like I'm expected to be thin by society.

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Wise Janet Weiss
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Are you guys happy with your weight?

Not really.But since I joined Scarleteen my stomach been's getting smaller and smaller.

Are you trying to loose weight?

Yep, But I know when not to go over the edge to anorexia.

Do you feel pressure to loose weight?

Yes,because most of the people here are small, even though thats because of the lack of funds.

Does being overweight affect your self-esteem?

A little bit, but I mostly keep myself busy so I don't have to notice.

And I also find girls with eating disorders really sad (skinny or not).And I'm really proud of myself,you know, I haven't been weighing myself 5 times a week like I used to and haven't been eating when I wasn't hungry. [Smile]

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From the opposite side of the house -
in the blue corner, 5' 1" weighing in at 100 pounds... the featherweight champ...

Are you guys happy about your weight?

For the most part. I used to weigh 95 for the longest time, but didn't feel out of sorts until
a. my mom got worried that I was too skinny
b. had to compete with heavier girls who had a definite advantage in carrying lots of weight on road marches.

This summer I got up to 108 within a couple of weeks due to injury. I didn't like the way my body felt - I think with a lot of girls, it's an intuitive feeling of oddness coupled with negative media images.

Do you feel constant pressure to be thin ? Are you trying to loose weight?

I feel pressure not to be thin, but to be in above-average physical shape. Contradictorily, the bit of extra weight I carry on my hips will ONLY disappear if I lose a couple of pounds - but I want to stay at least 100 pounds. A paradox.

Do you often compare your weight to others ?
No - but I do compare my body. I know this is damaging... in these comparisons, we have to think of all the multitude of other things that we have going for us. Weight is not significant in the long run as long as one is healthy and not very overweight.

I've had girls tell me, "I hate you because you're so thin." It gets my goat. Being constantly slightly underweight is not necessarily pleasant. Being happy with one's body is the key.

[ 09-26-2006, 04:09 AM: Message edited by: kitka ]

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I'm a guy (although not a particularly masculine one) and concerned about my weight, except I'm too thin and trying to gain weight. I don't really mind though it's just one of those things that's always on the back burner.
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I am 15 and really short Im like 4'10(i always get made fun of) but I weigh like 95-105 I used to be Bulmic and stuff and I still kinda have a problem with my weight. I think I will always want to be thinner and get rid of fat that i don't want...and worry about eating evening tho its my favorite oast time..haha

"I am the face in the mirror. Only not."

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I'm quite happy about my weight. When I came to college, I was very thin, rather ill, and down to a measly 85lbs. At 5'7, and 18 years of age, that just wasn't healthy for me. However, it was my own fault. Throughout highschool, I was so busy that I had time for two things -- coffee, and very small frozen entrees. Turns out I was getting about 500 calories a day, and that's a high estimate.

Once I got to college, things settled down, I had more free time, and food was abundant. I'm now up to 135, and this is three years later. I feel better overall -- I not only have more energy, but I'm stronger as well. Now I just need to remember to take my multivitamin every day -- just in case I don't get everything I need out of my meals.

"You owe me two lifetimes and a pair of perfect blue eyes."

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