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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Bodies » orgasims PLEASE HELP

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Author Topic: orgasims PLEASE HELP
rae16
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Member # 26977

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is it normal for you not to have orgasims during sex cause i have done it quite a few times and never had an orgasim i mean it felt good and all but i just dont have an organsim like i do when i masterbate? is that not a good sign? PLEASE HELP

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rae16


Posts: 5 | From: Lennon, MI United States | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dailicious
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Usually women do not experience orgasm from vaginal penetration alone, they additionally may need clitoral stimulation, which is probably what brings you to orgasm when you masturbate.

Because you say you have orgasmed during masturbation, there is nothing you need to worry about.

What you should do instead is probably explore other activites with your partner, such as clitoral stimulation along with or in addition to penetrative intercourse.

Also, this article might help: Sexual Responmse and Orgasm

[This message has been edited by dailicious (edited 01-13-2006).]


Posts: 3382 | From: Denver, Colorado | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rae16
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well when my boyfriend asked me if i have organsmed everytime i said yes(which was a lie) i just did not want to hurt his feelings. should i tell him the truth and if so how should i tell him. i dont want him to get mad!
Posts: 5 | From: Lennon, MI United States | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wobblyheadedjane
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Lying about sex and orgasms is not a good thing - it hurts you (because your pleasure is dimished by having a partner who is clueless about what you like) and your partner (because if/when he finds out, he'll be hurt, plus he's got the notion that certain things are working for you when they aren't.)

So, come clean. Yes, he may be hurt, but if he's a good guy, he'll understand. But then you can work together in communicating and having great sex, whether it ends in orgasms or not, since they're not the be-all and end-all of sex anyway.


Posts: 1679 | From: London, ON | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rae16
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thanks but i have done this before, like lieing to him and he got really upset and mad because i lied to him.. and when he asked me if i have orgasims i say yes and he asks me if i promise and i say yes.. just so i dont hurt him. how do i break it to him?? PLEASE HELP!! i want to clear this up.

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rae16


Posts: 5 | From: Lennon, MI United States | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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Just let it out ... Tell him that you're upset about something, you made a mistake, and you need to come clean. Tell him why you lied. He may be upset, but you need to understand that ... You may need to regain his trust again.
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lulufabuloso
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Thats totally normal...it just means that you maybe arn't comfortable enough yet with your partner or you may need to talk more about what you want. I go on SexEtc.org a lot and people talk about the same things all the time...orgasms...do you have them or no...all that junk. You should check that website out also and see what people say it's good stuff.

quote:
Originally posted by rae16:
is it normal for you not to have orgasims during sex cause i have done it quite a few times and never had an orgasim i mean it felt good and all but i just dont have an organsim like i do when i masterbate? is that not a good sign? PLEASE HELP



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wobblyheadedjane
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lulufabuloso, it's hard to tell from your post, but while not having orgasms during a sexual activity is normal, lying to one's partner about the orgasms (or lack thereof) is more the issue here.

Also, every post of yours so far has been a plug for another website. You're welcome to contribute to conversations here, but if your only purpose is to spam ST with links, then you may find your posting revoked.


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Peaches44
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my boyfriend and I were having sex for about a year before I told him that I had never had an orgasim with him. it was definitely not a good idea to wait as long as I did. thankfully we had a good conversation about it and I just explained to him that it was not his fault because it was common for women to need different things. you kind of need to suck it up and tell the truth. it's hard sometimes but in the end you will be glad that you did it.
Posts: 50 | From: Alberta Canada | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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