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feefiefofemme
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...got "the talk?" You know, where your parents sit you down and explain about the birds and the bees. What was it like for you? And for those of you who haven't had it, where did you go for information etc?

Personally, I don't even remember the first time I was given it, but my mum likes to tell the story. : ) I was three years old and my best friend's mum was having a baby. I was so persistint in asking my mum about it ("but Mommy, WHERE do babies COME FROM???) that she gave in and told me, even though I think she felt I was a little too young. She bought me several books on the subject and had a big, long discussion with me. A short while after that, I made friends with a girl in my preschool who had two mums. Of course I couldn't understand how she didn't have a father, after all, wasn't a man essential to the process? So my mum explained to me about artificial insemination, sperm banks, and all that jazz. Armed with this knowledge, I went off to kindergarten. That was the year my little brother was born. Of course, being a know-it-all type of kid, I explained the whole process to my class. That I remember. I also remember the 'some parents don't want their children knowing about that sort of thing so young' talk very clearly. : ) Anyhow, all in all I'm really glad my mum talked to me so young. I like to think it's the reason we have such an open relationship. I can talk to her about anything and everything.

So. Share your stories! BTW, I don't know that this topic belongs in this particular forum, so feel free to move it somewhere else.


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dailicious
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I think this topic will do just fine in Body & Soul.

I honestly don't ever remember asking "Where do babies come from?" or anything similar; I'm sure I did and my dad gave me a very straight-forward answer, but I don't remember.

What I DO remember is being about five years old, sitting on the kitchen counter and asking my dad, "Dad, what's sex?"

"It's one of the greatest things you'll ever experience."

And how.


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Ztloj
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My parents really didn't tell me much about sex (in fact, my dad never ever mentioned the subject, now that I think of it) and I kind of wish they did. I first got the talk when I was six-years-old and asked my mom what a penis was exactly. Despite the fact I had an older brother whom I was bathed with at the time, I never really thought much of anatomy differences. So she took me in the bathroom and calmly explained to me what intercourse was and how it made babies.

I had another sort of very technical talk with my mom in 6th grade when we watched those dreaded sex ed. videos in school, which wasn't far from the time I got my first period. Still, I never heard anything about sex being pleasurable or fun or even that I might engage in it some day. It was all very detached and I wish it hadn't been.

Thank heavens for sites like this


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Kisses Me Pink
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My mom only talked about it once, for like 5 minutes, and it wasn't that bad because she didn't go into extreme detail, only explained some of the anatomy.
I was 11. I knew pretty much all of it by that time anyway.
Anything I didn't know I found out in health class in 8th grade.

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feefiefofemme
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As I said, I don't remember the first time my mum talked to me about sex (I say first becuase it's a very open topic between us. We talk often about sex, AIDS, etc), but I do remember when she gave my brother the talk. I was there (doing my homework for sex ed, in fact) and it really wasn't awkward at all. He got it a bit later than I did (when he was five) but that was because he never asked. Because of that, I think it was a little more awkward for him. Again, I'm glad my mum gave it to me so early. Anyways, my mum started out talking about it technically, but then moved on to talking about emotional aspects. It was rather amusing. I did notice, however, that she didn't give him the sperm bank talk. And she didn't explain surrogate mothers and such until a few months later.
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ceresbaistat
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Being the spawn of a very dedicated nurse, I got the diagrams and a lecture at about five or so. After her lecture, i asked a couple questions, she answered them, and gave me a textbookshe apparently used in college.

I did not, however, get the talk about the emotional side until I turned fifteen.


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feefiefofemme
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I don't know whether or not I got the emotional side. I remember getting it when I got my first period (fourth grade, December 19th :)) along with a talk about AIDS and using protection, and I know my brother got the emotional side, but I don't recal ever getting it early on. But I was a romantic little tyke and the books did say 'when a man and a woman love each other very much' so I kinda figured it was something relatively pleausurable. Plus, my mum had explained lesbian and gay sex to me as well so I figured, what's the point if it's not enjoyable?
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Kisses Me Pink
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My mom has never talked to me about sex emotionally. I don't think she ever saw it necessary, since I'm sure she didn't ever want to talk about it at all.
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lizenny
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I never had one of those talks with my parents. When I was a kid I didn't care where babies came from so it wouldn't have started with that question. The kids at my elementary school were getting "a little too fresh" as they put it and they gave it to us there. My parents pretty much thought their job was done in that department. To be honest if they had tried to after the fact it would have creeped me out and I would have ended it immediately. I guess that's what happens after so many years of essentially having to pretend your genitals don't exist.

Other than that I wasn't really that curious but if there was any info I wanted I got it from textbooks. What I liked about textbooks is that they don't blush, sweat, stutter or yell "If you get pregnant missy I swear I'm gonna crucify you so keep your legs closed or you'll get what's coming!"

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You catch more flies with manure than you do with honey.

[This message has been edited by lizenny (edited 08-21-2005).]


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summergoddess
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I didn't really have the talk per se. I was 8 when my parents had conceived my little brother. I figured out that it was sex that made my older brother, me, and my younger brother. Sex was something that two people in love do.

They didn't really talk about it, as we are a catholic family. They assumed that I'd stay a virgin until my wedding night. From that, they thought I didn't need the talk in all aspects of sex.

I obviously didn't remain a virgin as they wanted me to. My beliefs changed over my teen years. I was ready to engage in sex at 17 with no regrets.

I pretty much learned it more from internet sites, and friends rather than sex-ed programs in school.

I wish though that my parents were more open with sex and sexual issues with me and my brothers.

Me and my fiance are planning to talk to our kids early about sex early in their lives. They will make their own beliefs/views about sex. We're not going to assume that our kids are going to wait until marriage. It's up to them to decide when they are ready to make that sexual step into their lives. Our goal is just to be able to have a comfortable and open sexual communication with our kids when we do have them.

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~Jules

[This message has been edited by summergoddess (edited 08-21-2005).]


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