Lately it seems like there have been alot of questions around here concerning a negative body image in relation to labia. So I came up with a little project to encourage a more positive labia image. Myself and as many other bloggers as we can collect are blogging about labia and I'd like to encourage everybody here to participate too.
Labia are beautiful and perfect and normal exactly the way they are. The images we may see in magazines or movies of labia are not necessarily true of every woman, nor do they need to be. So feel free to talk about your feelings on labia. Tell your story, make a list of reasons why you like them just the way they are, speak your mind on the subject or read what other people have had to say about labia.
Join the Labia Blog-a-Thon. Blog (or diary) to your heart's content about labia. If you want to email me or leave a note here about the url for your post, I'd be happy to add you to the list of participants. Or if you would like to participate but don't have a blog or diary, I'd be happy to put up a guest entry in my blog for you.
I just want to say I think this is a great idea! I hope a lot of the girls on here check it out, as I too have noticed there are many who have been complaining. I've never had a problem with my labia, so it's not an issue. But I just want to commend you and the others who have done this.
"True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen." ~La Rochefoucauld
hahaah good idea..I personally hate mine.. I have to admit.. I like the way they look in those mags rather then mine..but hey we all cant get what we want..I guess the major thing that got me all freaked out about letting a guy encounter them...was because a girl on my bus decided to take nude pics of her self(legs widde open) and send them around(I HAVE NO IDEA WHY) anyway so the talk has started...and I overheard some guys on my bus talking saying how nasty her "pussy" was because of those wrinkly things...and let me tell you..hers werent near to as bad as mine..they actully looked perfect to me...so..now I am all scared about letting a guy see mine...and thats why I was asking before if theres anyway to make them shrink......sighh...
Posts: 10 | From: marlboro nj usa | Registered: Apr 2002
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Have you read any of the blog entries linked into this project? We've got alot of entries from many many people. More than 20 seperate bloggers, and many of them with multiple guest entries. All about how beautiful ALL labia are...not just some labia, not just the labia that are small...ALL of them.
Questions like yours are exactly the reason we started this project. Because labia are beautiful, and frankly, anybody who would say things like what you heard doesn't deserve to be seeing them anyway. So don't stress about it. You don't need to make them shrink, you don't need to do anything about them but appreciate the fact that they are beautiful and perfect on their own.
Please read my blog and the links to all the other blogs about labia. Learn to love yourself.
I'm afraid I didn't have anything to say about labia. I really tried...but I was left without any thoughts worth writing down. But, I didn't want to feel left out by not talking about something like 'ooh, she's not supposed to say that!' so I sang the self-lovin' blues and linked it up. oh yeah
Posts: 103 | From: Las Vegas, NV | Registered: Mar 2002
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I just wanted to say that I think that it's a good idea what you are trying to do ...but for some of us it's hard to except yourself the way you are expecially when you are really self concious.All i wanted in life was to get rid of my labia mornia....I HATE IT!! I cry all the time bcause of it and it"s really hard to deal with. What I think that most girls have problems with is the fact of what guys might think most guys are very judge mental and think that girls are gross because of it.Personally rhat is my biggest fear why would a guy want to look at me when I can't even look at myself...Sometimes the sadness and embarressment gets to me and im sure it does to others...Im scared now I have devloped such a fear of it that I often think of suicide as a easy way out.I just don't think that a guy would want to be with a girl like me!
Posts: 79 | From: CaNaDa | Registered: Mar 2002
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Flatly, any guy who would ridicule a woman about her genitals is one who is not anything close to ready to be sexually active and physically intimate with a woman. Remember too that not all women plan on having men involved with their genitals. That aside, you'll find in your life that partners mature enough to be partners will not do any such thing. What you've got going there, love, is some serious paranoia.
I assure you that unless your GYN has told you your labia are abromal that they look like anyone else's labia. Considering suicide over a normal body part existing and being normal says to me that you need a very serious reality check OR that you need some counseling as those feelings may be due to depression and other things.
If you have those feelings, chances are you should likely wait to be physically intimate with others yourself: being comfortable with your own body is pretty key when it comes to sexual readiness.
In the meantime, I'd suggest you go to the library and take a look at some books which contain photos and/or illustrations of the human genitals so that you can have a look yourself and realize how normal you likely are. While it can be common for young people going through puberty and massive body changes to feel self-conscious for a while (everyone goes through that, they do), if those changes and developments are causing severe depression or suicidal feelings, it's time to see a counselor, because that severity of reaction is not normal.
(I'd also suggest you look at some new life goals. If wanting to be rid of a body part is all you want out of life, you're really wasting yours. After all, when it comes time to fill out a college or job application, are you goping to put that in there as your life goal? I certainly hope not.)
I've been sexually active for over 40 years. I've had the opportunity to view a lot of samples of the variety in genitalia.
No man I know would turn a woman away for the size, shape, flavor, color, thickness, or anything else, of their labia.
I had the occasion recently to meet a new partner. When I found that she had long stretchable labia, I was _excited_, as there were so many more things that could be done to give her pleasure. She is also a mature & experienced woman, probably in her mid 30s, and she had absolutely NO concern about them - never mentioned them at all and certainly did not let them inhibit her.
Who you going to listen to - someone who has been there many times, or your one fears? Trust me on this one.
On this topic, I just want to recommend Joani Blank's wonderful book "Femalia" to anyone who can get hold of a copy.
In her sex education work, Blank found that huge numbers of women were convinced that their (perfectly healthy) vulvas were deformed or ugly, because often their only images of what vulvas looked like came from sketchy diagrams in textbooks, or from porn.
So she put together this little book of close-up photos of women's vulvas. Not porn, just showing what ordinary women's bodies look like, and the amazing and beautiful diversity around. I think a lot of people would find it very educational and reassuring.
to be honest i never thought about it... the thought that they might not be 'normal' never crossed my mind, and nor did any kind of thought about them while i think about it...
Posts: 65 | From: uk | Registered: May 2002
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Hey, I'm still a male virgin and I don't think I would personally have a problem with the shape color or size of a woman's labia. if i'd be lucky enough to even come contact with a woman's labia, i'd be satisfied. girls don't worry about what makes you different/ unique.
Posts: 9 | Registered: Oct 2002
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The 2003 International Labia Blog-A-Thon has gotten off to an AMAZING start this year! 14 contributors so far, and still growing. This is really a great cause, and I'd encourage everybody to pitch in and participate if you can.
I know exactly how u feel, mine are really bad also...or atleast i think so, i'm scared to ever have sex or ne thing cuz it looks gross =( my self esteem lowers so much because of it...i had a bf who wanted to have sex and so did i, but i told em no because i wasnt ready, but really i was embarrassed of what he might see....
Posts: 3 | From: henderson, NV, USA | Registered: Jan 2004
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iluvme, have you read some of the pieces people have written about their labia? Everyone's got different labia (heck, mine and many others don't even have symmetrical ones!), and like your knees or your nose, they're not 'gross'. Why not take a look at the blog (it's right here!) and feel a little more comfortable with your own awesome labia?
Posts: 1679 | From: London, ON | Registered: Jan 2003
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i think this is a great thing you did b/c personally i have a very low self esteem about my body and face but most of all my labia, i think they are gross but like the guyz that have went there haven't complained but i still feel like that there is somthing wrong.
Posts: 15 | From: manteca,ca,usa | Registered: Nov 2003
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I think mine are awful - wrinkly and prune-ish and big - but currently I'm thinking it doesn't matter because I'm 15 and not really about to have sex any time soon. All the same, I really don't reckon most guys are so un-shallow that they won't think twice about the size of my labia. The problem is that they haven't been taught that there are different sizes, so they all picture cute little things. I know that other people share my problem, but I just wish I knew HOW common it is.
Posts: 5 | From: London, England | Registered: Apr 2004
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I'm not sure where you're getting ayour assumptions from about what people -- male or female, let's remember that for some of us, it's women, not men, getting a gander at our labia -- think about or expect of labia from.
But for the most part, people who have never seen labia in person before aren't expecting anything specific, because they really don't know what to expect.
But large labia are as common as small labia. And most labia are wrinkly, not smooth.
Hi, I spent years worrying about this issue. My heart goes out to you girls who are worried, too. Look on the internet at the numerous websites devoted to this issue. Also, it is helpful to surf pornography sites, which have a variety of different shapes, sizes and colors. They're not all alike, even in pornography. Just as different men prefer different body tpyes, some prefer petite women, some prefer tall women, some prefer heavy women, they also prefer different shapes elsewhere. All types are beautiful. Never forget this.
Posts: 1 | From: seattle, wa | Registered: May 2005
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a good page to read is the boyfriend doesnt believe in her labia. i posted there. but ya cool advice here for sure. glad i found it fast. weird world..
Posts: 7 | From: Canada | Registered: Feb 2006
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edited by Miz Scarlet -- YO! Scarleteen is NOT the place to come and tell young women the explicit details of what you like to do to labia sexually. Please review the guidelines before posting again.
Hey ladies! Most men love your labia it wouls seem that it is the minority that do not like them. Personnaly I love to -- edited --
[This message has been edited by Miz Scarlet (edited 02-12-2006).]
O.K. I know, I know I probably shouldn't say anything so I am not hypocritical but I think all of you should know this. Your labia's are majestic, and wonderful. Perhaps the best part, did you know if they are not even and you tug on them they will if you do it properly, or that long ones really do look like roses. Did you know most guys perfer them longer, even though most girls perfer them sort. Or that it's natural and a sign of furtility if they are a little wrinkled down there. I think the reason so many girls hate parts of their body isn't because they hate it, it's because they don't know it. I think scarleteen should do a did you know, body part article. People should know how amazing they truly are.
Posts: 198 | From: Ca, USA | Registered: Dec 2005
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Yes, labia are wonderful and cool. But. Tugging on them will not change their shape. It's not possible to make generalizations about what guys like or what girls like, because everyone likes something different (and most people could care less how big a partner's labia are, if they even have female partners at all). And wrinkled labia are not a sign of fertility. Try and stick to the facts, okay?
Posts: 5799 | From: Canada/Australia | Registered: Sep 2004
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quote:I know I probably shouldn't say anything so I am not hypocritical but I think all of you should know this. Your labia's are majestic, and wonderful.
Well, I don't mean to call you out, kiwi, but it does ring oddly considering you just purportedly had a labiaplasty. It also makes your comments below seem a bit hollow: after all, when you were asking about that, we told you about the normlacy of your labia, about what they are for, etc. and it didn't seem to have any effect, eh?
quote: Perhaps the best part, did you know if they are not even and you tug on them they will if you do it properly
Bzzzt. Women with heavy genital piercings may find this occurs, because that is a very constant, consistent tugging. But otherwise? Nah. The tissue of your labia is a lot like the tissue of the lips of your mouth: it's fairly resilient and highly elastic, and tugging isn't going to alter than tissue in any noticeable way.
For the record, the big reason the labia are often not the exact same size is due to the way the genitals develop when we're all just fetuses: the genitals of male and female start out identical embryonically and organically develop. Nature tends to be fairly unconcerned with the symmetry of tissue as a whole, whether we're talking genitals or the lips on our face (which no one expects to be identical or symmetrical, no less).
quote:Did you know most guys perfer them longer, even though most girls perfer them sort.
I have yet to see ANY studies done of labial size preferences among men OR women, and even when they are done -- if they are, which would be unusual, given it's not the most relevant information from a social or medical standpoint -- one'd want to look at the results with a very critical eye, eespecially considering that there are two entire continents with some pretty crazy approaches to the labia, namely North America and many communities in Africa. Where did you see the information you're referring to?
And on top of that, what men think of women's bodies really should only be so relevant, no matter a woman's orientation. We really don't like to put emphasis on that per body image at Scarleteen, because it's a very unstable platform on which to set one's own body image.
quote:Or that it's natural and a sign of furtility if they are a little wrinkled down there.
Labia of all shapes and sizes are, as they are, natural. But they don't have a thing to do with fertility. I've never seen any folk customs that reference this, either.
quote:I think the reason so many girls hate parts of their body isn't because they hate it, it's because they don't know it. I think scarleteen should do a did you know, body part article. People should know how amazing they truly are.
Trivia on body parts isn't something we're going to spend a lot of time on, for a handful of reasons. There are a LOT of theories per poor body image in women, but since it's more skewed towards women than men -- men can too have poor body image, but it does occur less commonly -- most, logically, center on media issues, on women's bodies being endlessly talked about first, rather than as part of a whole person, ON women valuing their bodies only because of their sexual appeal or how others sexualize them, etc. And again, see my first statement in this post addressing your comments: clearly, even for you personally, knowing about your labia wasn't a very big help in that regard.
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