The world at large likes to make us think that sex and pleasure is something which exists only in our genitals, which may be one of the roots of so many people being sexually dissatisfied and disillusioned.
I say, protest. Our bodies are all unique and all different, as are our minds, and that given, we all have our own unique pleasure-maps, as it were, on our bodies: areas we really like to have touched which are not considered to be our "sexual parts" by homogenous culture.
So, in a moment of body honoring, why not think about -- and talk about -- what some of your pleasure-spots are outside the limited sphere of your genitals. All too often we forget to honor them, or even find out what they are, and not only can that deprive us of really understanding our own unique bodies and sexual identities, it can make us not even realize that there are ways for us to be sexually pleasured that don't involve high-risk sexual activities at all!
Personally, I love to have my face, neck and back touched, massaged or kissed. I also have very sensitive hands.
I love it when my boyfriend kisses my forehead. It's such a sweet and caring gesture. I just close my eyes and feel all warm. The back of my neck is really sensitive. Little kisses back there make me all tingly. The inside of my elbow (is there a real name for that?) is also another happy spot.
My boyfriend likes it when I rub the back of his head, playing with his hair. His ears and his neck are super sensitive. I love kissing his neck and his ears. He's also a big fan of back massages. So many happy spots.
------------------ Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.
Well, let me think....My partner has this special way of giving me head massages that makes me melt. Clever fellow that he is, when he notices I get stressed or when I am nervous, he hugs me and massages my head in his own special way. *sigh*
My neck is really sensitive, too, and I love having it kissed. And back massages, and foot massages....I really like it when my lower back is massaged firmly. I actually think all kinds of holding and caressing make me happy. And strangely enough, just as Lin and her guy, my partner and I, we also have this habit of rubbing our noses, too ( Lin, honey, isn't that scary?!) - sometimes, but not always as a *substitute* for PDA. Started that when I was sick one time....but we've kept that. And I love it.
I agree with Cookie here - so many happy spots! - And isn't it the best to look for happy spots? Or suddenly discover happy spots?
What a great topic! There are so many 'happy' spots on the body. Personally I love being kissed on my neck and ears. It literally makes me melt. I get all shaky and relaxed. I also really love having my hair played with. Head massages are wonderful and so soothing.
The noses thing is so sweet! My ex and I kind of used to do that whereby we'd kiss and then back away looking in eachother's eyes. this topic makes me happy.
my neck and shoulders are the most sensitive. i absolutely love to be kissed there. LAH! *floats around*
i also like being held generally...hands resting on my tummy. hehe...i like to know that he like it...kind of reminds me of the ee cummings poem...
"i like my body when it is with your body. It is so quite a new thing. Muscles better and nerves more. i like your body. i like what it does, i like its hows. i like to feel the spine of your body and its bones, and the trembling -firm-smooth ness and which i will again and again and again kiss, i like kissing this and that of you"
------------------ have i been wrong? have i been wise? to shut my eyes and play along?
TUMMMYS!!!!!!!!!! i have a REALY big "thing" for tummys!!!!! i like mine rubed slowly or i like to rub my girlfrends!!!!! she has REALY soft skin there so it feels realy nice!
Posts: 101 | From: truro cornwall england | Registered: Aug 2000
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Well, I thought about this whole topic last night, and I realized that it actually doesn't matter which part of my body is caressed. If I feel at home in my skin and happy and safe, caressing of any part of me is greatly appreciated and can make me melt and even happier. Hm, good eh?
And Rizzo - Yup, we called it (let's be PC) "Inuit Kissing", too. I don't know whether the Inuit actually rub their noses, but the Maori in New Zealand welcome each other that way (it's called "hongi" and is actually more of a firm pressing of the noses).
oooohhh!!! ooohhh!!! i love it when my bf gently runs his hands up and down the sides of my body...without deviating from that track. i also love it when he kiSSes my neck and runs his fingers on my back.
I have super long hair (down to my butt crack) and my b/f loves to play with it and i will just sit there and turn into a wet noodle when he plays with it. He has a thing for tummys.... he likes for me to just put my hands there or even just rub it a little. And ears, oh wee both love our ears. I like to be kissed right in the middle of my chest between my breasts. Its so fun to just cuddle and kiss with your partner and just let your hands roam all over each others bodies finding these little happy places.
Posts: 523 | From: Ashland, Oregon, US | Registered: Jun 2000
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My ear... although, it's weird. The first few times that my girlfriend kissed my ear, it was lovely, incredibly erotic... but sinec I pointed out how lovely it is, she's really made an effort, and it no longer feels quite so good. I should tell hre what i think, it's not exactly an important aspect of the relationship, but still... it's hard to tell someone they're not doing the right thing!
Posts: 105 | From: London | Registered: Feb 2001
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Mmm. I love it when my girlfriend plays with my hair. I got it all cut off a few months back and I love it. When ever we're snuggling, she's always rubbing my head. It's great.
Posts: 290 | From: Minneapolis | Registered: Feb 2001
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ooh, yes, the back of my neck. i love when my boyfriend kisses there. i feel it at the base of my spine. also my sides - i'm so ticklish, but i love being gently touched there. and my stomach. and my hands. and my hair. and my neck. i love the neck thing. and basically the whole rest of my body. as long as i'm not being tickled, i just love being touched anywhere. i'm very sensitive.
my boyfriend is more specific. he loves the ear thing (much more than i do). he loves when i play with the hair on the back of his head. i do that sometimes when he's driving and i'm in the passenger seat. also his upper arms, and his stomach. except he can't stand if i touch his belly button. it's amusing. what a silly boy.
------------------ Love is a word that is constantly heard Hate is a word that is not. Love, I am told, is more precious than gold. Love, I have read, is hot. But hate is the verb that to me is superb, And love but a drug on the mart. Any kiddie in school can love like a fool, But hating, my boy, is an art. -Ogden Nash
Just reading this over, I don't think that anyone mentioned the simple act of holding hands with someone. Personally, I find that so much can be conveyed in the way someone holds your hand- it can say "we're flirting and having fun", it can say "we're really good friends" or it can even convey "I love you," I think. (Heh, that sounds pretty soppy doesn't it? )
Posts: 2710 | From: Australia | Registered: Jun 2000
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From what little experience i've had with this, i'd have to say my feet, back, neck, hair, and hands. I really just like to be touched and stroked, feels very nice. And as i was saying earlier to some other friends, while i hate playing with other people's hair, i love it so much when people play with me. It feels really good to me.
------------------ 'You've got the eyes of ten women. Not in a jar! I wasn't accusing you. I just mean your eyes are really nice'-coupling
GOod spots.. um... kissing my neck and stomach.. blowing in the ear is nice too. and its nice when a guy puts his arm around my waist.
Posts: 14 | From: California | Registered: Jan 2002
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Mmmm. Good times. I have plenty of body arts other than genitalia which are responsive to touch. Holding hands is so incredible, that was part of my whole looking forward to relationship thing before my boyfriend and I got together. My neck is really sensitive, as well as my feet, ears, neck, and chest (although, it's trickier there because it takes a really light touch). Depending on the person, though, almost any place a person touches me can be lovely.
Posts: 218 | Registered: Apr 2002
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I like to have my back stroked slowly, or my face and neck rubbed. My girlfriend likes the same places, but her sides and belly as well. Also, just hugging is nice, it doesn't have to lead anywhere and it's nice just to be close to her.
Posts: 125 | From: Leicestershire, England | Registered: Jun 2002
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i love it when my bf kisses my neck and moves down...anyways...he hasn't been doing it as often..i think i will ask him to. i also just love to be held. it feels so right when we are together that just being held is awesome and can turn me onand he is a definate ear guy. he loves to be kissed on the ears.
------------------ ~*Scientists say that one out of 4 people are crazy. go to 3 of ur friends and if they are okay, you are it.*~
~*In faith i do not love thee with mine eyes for they in thee a thousand errors note but tis my heart which love what they dispise, who in despite of view is pleased to dote, Nor are mine ears by thine tounge's tune delighted, Nor tender feeling base touches prone, Nor taste nor smell desire to be invited, To any sensual feast with thee alone. But my five wits nor five senses can dissuade one foolish heart from serving thee, Who leaves unswayed the likeness of a man, Thy proud heart's slave and vassal wretch to be. Only my plague thus far can i count my gain, that he who makes me sin awards me pain. ~*William Shakespeare Sonnet 141
this is a bit of an old post, but i was searching for sumthing and i came across it. i like it! so i wanted to answer it
okie... i love when people kiss my ear or suck on the lobe... omgoodness it drives me crazy. lol my exbf did it so much tho that i think i got a slight ear infection... lol oops...
i really like it when people kiss my fingers... like they show me how they hook up by using my fingers... i cant actually see what they're doing in any other way. lol it makes me really want a guy when he does that.
kissing my neck makes me happy to.
when guys play with my hair... as long as it doesnt get notty cause that just hurts lol.
body massages make me happy... but my neck and back are usually tense, so those are good places to massage. and i love when my tummy is rubbed lol i dunno its really relaxing.
i think my list is pretty long, but its cause i dont want to be sexually active... so i find a lot of other ways other than sex to make me happy.
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