personally, i've quit self-injuring a few times, the longest time being for over a year. the only way i've done this is to just outright stop. i don't believe in using external physical outlets, like excercise or boxing or hitting a pillow (perhaps part of hte reason self-injury is my "coping mechanism"), and they don't seem to be replacements, anyway.

i usually make the decision to stop, and don't think about how long i'm stopping for until i haven't self-injured for a while (i find that if i set time limits, i wait for them to be over, and then resume the SI) and have proven to myself that i can survive without SI. sometimes i keep a journal, sometimes not. i find that the longer i go without doing any SI, i have less frequent urges to do so. plus, if i haven't self-injured in, say, three months, and i feel the urge to, i can remind myself that i've made it that long, and that i can hold out longer-- almost like having a contest with myself.

that's just what works for me, but i feel like that's a healthy way that doesn't involve finding new coping mechanisms.

See, my friend and I recently went through this horrible stage of hurting ourselves in the previous year. I, after searching soo deep inside myself, recovered from it, but she has not. She suffered through sexual abuse as well as mental abuse when she was smaller, and grew up around women who put up with so much from their bfs/husbands it just makes me sick.

Last year she finally opened up to her mother and told her how she had been -- edited -- ...etc. She saw psychiatrist after psychiatrist, and it resulted in her being put on Prozac, to calm her feelings down...to make her less angry at things she thought was ALL her fault. During this stage in her life, her boyfriend was an abusive asshole...to be perfectly honest. My "girls" and I tried soo hard to get her away from him but she kept crawling back.

Well anyway, this year she met the man of her dreams, literally. He's always been my good friend and I knew he'd treat her well. To make a long story short, after months of them being utterly happy, she decides to hook up with another guy one random weekend (an abusive ass hole that I hated the first time I laid eyes on him..ha but then again she seems to fall for those ones a lot faster)...and her and her bf broke up.

Ever since then she's gone back to her cutting stages. I don't think at this point she is suicidal, but my god if something happened I would feel like it was my fault for not stopping it sooner. I feel like it's my responsibility, as her friend and has someone who has recovered from this, to help her get out of this damn hole she keeps digging herself. *Sigh* ..I would appreciate some advice...

Thanks@

(Edited because this is a non-triggering thread, and there was graphic detail in this post. Please remember not to describe any specific acts of self-injury here. Thank you. -- Kyth, Scarleteen Advocate)

------------------
Kythryne Aisling
Scarleteen Sexpert