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Author Topic:   ode to saran wrap
somewhatanonymous
Activist

Posts: 139
From: WA, USA
Registered: May 2001

posted 10-07-2002 02:27 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for somewhatanonymous     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Saran wrap is the greatest thing ever. For just $3 one could safely lick 200 square feet of woman (or man or any combination of the two) without worry of bad tastes, pubes, or STDs.

HOWEVER, there a few things to be mentioned:
1- LUBE, if you do not somehow lube the other side of the saran wrap dental dam it will crumple up into a little ball, but lube tastes bad so don't get it on the side that you plan to lick. The easiest way to do this is to lube the area to be covered and then put the saran wrap on top of it.
2-SIZE, I have no idea how a condom cut open is supposed to even begin to be big enough to serve as a dental dam. Rip off a HUGE 1.5 to 2-foot section of saran wrap, stick the top of it to their body (lower stomach, lower back, whatever is handy) so that it doesn't go anywhere (don't put lube on this part either, otherwise it doesn't stick)and smoothe the rest of it down over their genetals and anus. There should be extra left over, things shift around, you may need it.
3-ADJUST, and readjust. As aforementioned, things shift around, so keep readjusting and holding, if possible, the edges of the saran wrap so that they stay covering that which you do no want in your mouth (get the other person to do this for you if possible, tell them you need to concentrate, and they're not doing anything with their hands anyway).

Saran Wrap Dental Dam FAQ
Q. Doesn't a dental dam get in the way?
A. NO. Absolutely not, not even a little, I swear.

Q. Really?
A. Yes, really. If you adequately lubbe the one side it will slip around and conform to every imaginable shape to fit every crevace you could possibly want to lick

Q. But what if I want to use my hands too and the dental dam really is inhibiting me?
A. Put on a glove, lube it so it doesn't stick to the saran wrap, and reach under the dental dam.

Q. Doesn't saran wrap taste funny?
A. Yes, deal with it. Or get some flavored lube and lube your side with it (or just deal with it, it's not that bad).

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Miz Scarlet
Sexpert

Posts: 19846
From: Minneapolis
Registered: May 2000

posted 10-07-2002 07:48 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for Miz Scarlet     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Just a note: the average latex dental dam is about 6x6 or 10x6 inches. And at that size, they are useable, I assure you. If using a larger sheet of cling film works better for you, then that's just swell. But it is also totally possible to use a dam that's smaller with ease, and it is possible to use a barrier without covering the body with it. You, or your partner, just hold it with your hands in place.

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson

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logic_grrl
Advocate

Posts: 5788
From: UK
Registered: May 2002

posted 10-07-2002 07:54 AM     Click Here to See the Profile for logic_grrl     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
There are also fun devices called "dam garters" (which you can buy, or make at home with some minimal sewing skills) which will hold a dental dam in place for a hands-free experience.

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somewhatanonymous
Activist

Posts: 139
From: WA, USA
Registered: May 2001

posted 10-07-2002 12:06 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for somewhatanonymous     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
complete off-topic side note: hey! we all registered out accounts in may. Miz Scarlet May 2000, somewhatanonymous May 2001, logic-grrl May 2002. What is it about may?

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Miz Scarlet
Sexpert

Posts: 19846
From: Minneapolis
Registered: May 2000

posted 10-07-2002 12:24 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Miz Scarlet     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Welp, mine is registered then because that's when I opened the boards!

------------------
Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson

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