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Post A Reply Login Name: Password: Message Icon:                                                                       Message: HTML is not enabled. UBB Code™ is enabled. [QUOTE]Originally posted by Heather: [QB] It might help to just accept that very often, people will have regret about something like this because they figure there is some "perfect" way they could have had first-time sex that they missed out on. Even people who had good first-time experiences will often feel it could have been different if they did this, or that, or would have been better if they waited until X age, or didn't wait, what have you. The tricky thing about that is that no one has any way of knowing that. For all you know, if you had made a different choice the first time, your life may have taken a totally different trajectory and you may not have even met this current boyfriend, for instance. The real truth most likely is that most people's ideas of some perfect first time where the relationship also always is and remains great with no hurt ever involved aren't likely realities. I get that a situation like you were in hurts and sucks, but at the same time, even people who choose to have first-time sex with caring, loving partners who treat them well are often disappointed in some way. Every time we have a new sexual partner, it's its own set of first times: seriously. I say this to you at the cusp of turning 40 after over two decades of sexual partnerships. There is no one first time that gets all the value. You also made the choice you did based on what you knew at the time: that's all anyone can do. So, how about you try and just know what's past is part, you have no idea what a different first time with someone else may have been like, and enter into this new relationship understanding you have a whole set of first times to have in IT, too? [/QB][/QUOTE]

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