T O P I C R E V I E W
Link the Hero of Lime
Member # 33629
posted 05-10-2007 03:00 PM
Okay recently a girl got caught masturbating in the toilets at the all-girls school across the road from my all-boys school. I've discussed with several friends what their views on masturbation are and all the girls I asked generally gave the same reply - "EWW!! THAT'S DISGUISTING!! I'M NOT A LESBIAN!!!" I'd normally reply by trying to convince them it’s a perfectly natural and healthy thing that perhaps more girls should give a try. I'd normally follow up by giving them a few reasons why it's not a bad thing. That gave me an idea I want us to think of as many positive things there are about female masturbation thus making my argument even stronger!! These are my reasons so far; - Masturbation can relieve depression, stress and lead to a higher sense of self-worth. - Masturbation is also seen as a sexual technique that protects individuals from the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases. - Many people see masturbation as an effective, natural cure for insomnia. - It makes you more relaxed which may lead you to be more likable. - I remember reading about it helping to regulate your hormones but i may be mistaken on this one. Your turn!
Juniata
Member # 24611
posted 05-10-2007 03:12 PM
Well, biologically there's absolutely nothing wrong with female masturbation. People tend to fear it if they have cultural hang-ups. I consider female masturbation a way to get to know your own body sexually, to know what pleases you and to generally give yourself a more confident, healthier sexual attitude. I feel that it's important to know yourself before you become involved in sexual relationships with other people. Also, women of all stripes masturbate. This includes straight women, bi women, lesbian women, and women who don't like to label themselves according to the sexual binary (I think that's the proper use of the term). So basically: there's nothing not to like about female masturbation. What I would like to ask those girls is why they claim to despise it so much--that probably best reveal how their mistrust of masturbation is not actually based in fact.
Miss Lauren
Member # 25983
posted 05-10-2007 03:23 PM
Well, I'd disagree on few points. Masturbation may be a temporary relaxer, but it in no way is qualified to be a long-term solution to depression, stress, or sleeping problems. If used in such a way, it might become a compulsion. And nah, won't help with hormones. If masturbation had cleared my acne, I'd have done it a lot more! Self-worth? Again, there's a lot more effective ways to gain a sense of that, even while masturbation is an effective way to learn about and be comfortable with one's body. You have to realize that a vast minority of people simply don't masturbate, and that's okay; that'll be their hurdle. But, I'm sort of wondering where this crappy mentality from women is coming from that masturbation is "gay" -- that's not the first time we've seen it on the boards, here.
Beppie
Member # 94
posted 05-11-2007 06:42 AM
Well, I don't think Link was suggesting that masturbation is a cure-all for chronic stress or depression etc-- he was simply saying that it can be an effective part of a person's coping mechanism. Clearly, if these problems are occuring to the extent that they are causing serious problems in a person's life, then simply masturbating won't help, but it's certainly something that can help if you're simply having a crappy day, or you're feeling stressed out from studying. I think that the (extremely silly) idea that masturbation is "gay" comes from the idea that if you're aroused by your own body, you must be aroused by other people of your own gender too.
Link the Hero of Lime
Member # 33629
posted 05-11-2007 01:42 PM
Okay this thread kinda took a wrong turn lol. Firstly I'm not here to argue about the ETHICS of masturbation. I personally have read the various articles around this site and I think masturbation (on both sides) is a good thing that should be encouraged. I know that it's not everyone cup of tea but "don't knock it till you've tried it." And of COURSE I know masturbation is for everyone - these are the words of a variety of teenage friends. Anyone who's ever spoken to a (certainly British) teenage girl will most likely know what I mean. So let's try again I'm looking for more reasons to SUPPORT my arguement since my reasons alone are not convincing my friends to at least give it a try.
Slayer_gurl
Member # 5822
posted 05-11-2007 03:44 PM
I remember a girl I knew in my mid teens would freak out at the very mention of the word masturbation. Which, considering the kinda person she was in other ways, was very surprising to me. Looking back on her though, she DID have extremely long nails. That may explain it to some degree lol Masturbation is awesome. It relieves: a) boredom b) minor stress c) insomnia d) a bad mood and allows you to know your own body and what feels good to you.
Miss Lauren
Member # 25983
posted 05-11-2007 03:48 PM
'kay, my bad. Just wanted to make sure some stuff was clear for further discussion is all. You know, some of this stuff is just plain so deeply embedded there might not BE a way to sway their minds either way. Perhaps the best point to make is that masturbation is mostly the only way to learn how to orgasm and what works for one's body. Though, I've used that argument myself and gotten the "Oh, well, I've just taught my man and learned to orgasm with him!". Yeah, well.. the chances of him hanging around forever are pretty slim, and once he ups and leaves, you're left with no control over your sexuality until you find and teach the next guy. Besides, it's just plain crappy, in my opinion, to expect a partner to be completely liable for one's sexuality and enjoyment, and likely sets up a pretty stressful dynamic.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 05-11-2007 06:03 PM
You know, one thing to bear in mind is that a lot of that reaction -- well, some of it, anyway -- can be a bit insincere just because so many people, especially younger people, just can't deal with talking about masturbation in public and feel so much shame about it. So, for all you know, some of your friends reacting that way may well already BE masturbating, but be talking the way they are because they feel ashamed or for other reasons. And generally, you kinda can't sell other people on any given sexual activity. I think I get where you're coming from, and that's certainly honorable, but often, any push from anyone for us to engage in any kind of sex feels like exactly that: pushing. And any kind of sexual pushing not only often nets bad results, it can also only make sexual shame worse (and obviously, the worst kinds of sexual pushing are downright abusive, but we're not talking about that here with you). To boot, a male trying to push women into any sort of sexual activity -- even one that he's not involved in -- can feel pretty creepy, for all the obvious reasons, even when those women are your friends. There is just WAY too much cultural/pervasive male pressure on women to have this sort of sex or that, or to do this sexual thing or that, for that to often go well or feel right. So, for sure, I'm all about talking about the pros of masturbation (though I don't know that the pros for women differ than the pros for men), and y'all who want to dish it here should feel 100% free to do so. But I'd encourage you to do it for yourselves rather than to try and sway others into msturbating, especially since the vast, vast majority of people -- including people who publicly react to it that way -- already do it. FYI, in terms of long-term chemical depression, regular masturbation really CAN be a big help, just like regular exercise can: it relieves stress, it gives a dose of mood-elevating enorphins, etc.
bluefreak44
Member # 12381
posted 05-12-2007 09:43 PM
quote: I've used that argument myself and gotten the "Oh, well, I've just taught my man and learned to orgasm with him!". Yeah, well.. the chances of him hanging around forever are pretty slim, and once he ups and leaves, you're left with no control over your sexuality until you find and teach the next guy. I'm actually one of the "taught him myself" girls, but I have a pretty different view on sex than the majority of people on here anyway (no sex until we were married, so it's a bit more complicated if he were to decide to "up and leave"). However, most of my issues with masturbation are more personal, and would probably only really apply to another Christian who plans on not having sex until he or she is married, so I'm not gonna argue it here. I've never associated it with lesbianism, though, and I don't know anyone who does. Just a note, one thing I sometimes find frustrating in Christian circles is that masturbation is preached against for guys and girls, but there's not so much taboo about guys doing it. I hear so much about how a guy's just "wired" to need to do it. Cuz, you know, since girls don't have penises, they don't have libidos either. If it's okay because of one's natural urges, then it should be okay for both sexes.
SatisfactionBroughtItBack
Member # 33027
posted 05-14-2007 01:19 PM
Well female masturbation is good in ways such as: (1) It helps you understand your body and makes you so much more comfortable with it. (2) It makes you less frightened of sexual contact with a loved one as you already know things about your body and what is good and what is bad for it. (3) In alot of cases,if you try masturbation it makes you alot less ignorant of why people do it and you are less likely to say it is 'disgusting' or to make the very ignorant remark that only 'boys or lesbians do it'. (4) If you masturbate,you can get a sense of what will hurt you and what is safe or nice to do. (5) Rushing straight into sexual contact with another person before you have taken time to learn what its all about yourself is a bad idea as it can lead to confusion and frustation. I don't agree with the common claim that females dont have the 'need' for sexual relief like men do.I have heard ignorant people saying ridiculous things like 'Normal women dont need to masurbate.Thats only for men.Normal women dont get urges like men do.If they masturbate its because they are homosexual and they dont have a man to have sex with.Women do it for fun only and thats disgusting.Masturbation should only be used when a MAN has urges he cant resist'. I find this stupid and irritating when I hear things like this.What is masturbation but fun to both sexes?
Heather
Member # 3
posted 05-14-2007 01:50 PM
quote: I don't agree with the common claim that females dont have the 'need' for sexual relief like men do.I have heard ignorant people saying ridiculous things like 'Normal women dont need to masurbate.Thats only for men.Normal women dont get urges like men do.If they masturbate its because they are homosexual and they dont have a man to have sex with.Women do it for fun only and thats disgusting.Masturbation should only be used when a MAN has urges he cant resist'. And, of course, those sentiments aren't positive for women OR men. After all, it doesn't say very good things about men or masturbation when male masturbation is framed as this thing men HAVE to do to keep themselves in check, and/or that men do because they're primitives who just cannot control themselves.
ipsesloev
Member # 31520
posted 05-15-2007 06:08 PM
Personally it gives me a wonderful ab exercise, especially since woman can get multiple orgasms