T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 96171
posted 08-11-2012 09:21 PM
Maybe it was the way I was raised and that my personality seems to mesh well with guys, but I honestly only have one girl friend that I hang out with. I have a few that I talk with on a weekly basis, but that's still few and far between.
I really don't get why I have yet to ever been asked out. Well I have, but by older men. They like me enough to be friends, and hang out and chat, but nothing more. I'm friendlier, and definitely more feminine than I used to be, and frankly just get along better with guys. I've also lost a substantial amount of weight, and while attention has increased I suppose, nothing has yet changed. I just don't get it. I'd love to be able to have more friends, and to date like everybody else does. I'm so out of touch, it's unbelievable, but I guess that's what happens when you're four years behind.
Member # 42505
posted 08-12-2012 04:33 AM
Have you tried asking people you are interested in on a date?
Member # 91788
posted 08-12-2012 09:41 AM
Hey, jayjay! Have you tried meeting new people at social gatherings?
Member # 96171
posted 08-12-2012 01:20 PM
I'm a very secluded person in some sense, and also can be insecure. With either sex, I realized that I just don't click with many people for some reason and I don't know how to fix it. I have severely branched out in the last year and met and talked to people when I never would've before. I'm just more relaxed. The only reason I've never asked anyone out is because I don't know what their types are, I don't want to freak them out and lose even our friendship, and because I really don't know how to. I'm twenty and never had to do it before and so I'm in an unknown world with relationships.
Member # 35643
posted 08-13-2012 04:32 AM
It sounds good that you're feeling more relaxed and meeting new people. What makes you think that someone you asked out would freak out?
Perhaps a good way to find out what types of people your friends are interested in is to ask them? PS- what do you mean by being "four years behind"?
Member # 96171
posted 08-13-2012 07:55 AM
Well because it would be coming out of nowhere, and the fact that they haven't asked me out so I wouldn't imagine they'd want to date me. I guess I could ask a few of my friends that without being too upfront.
I mean that I'm twenty and I've never gone on a date or dated. Had sex with people, yes, but never dated. So while most people figure all this out at like 16 or so, I haven't.
moonlight bouncing off water
Member # 44338
posted 08-13-2012 10:32 AM
quote: Originally posted by jayjay92: Well because it would be coming out of nowhere, and the fact that they haven't asked me out so I wouldn't imagine they'd want to date me. This may be true in some cases, but if everyone used this logic then no one would ask anyone out! The people you like may be thinking the same thing about you. Everything must start somewhere, and there's no sense waiting for someone else to start it, because they may have the same hesitations you do.
Also, there's no one age that people "figure out" dating. Lot's of people haven't had any kind of sexual or romantic involvement with anyone and lots have had way, way more by then. It's really on an individual basis and there is nothing wrong with you being 20 and begining to figure this out.