T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 31269
posted 12-17-2009 07:45 AM
Hey everyone, its been a while again - laptops been broken and its been pretty hectic on the road up to christmas so didnt have time to get it fixed.
Gotta admit, I havent had a great few weeks at all. First of all, huge problems arose in my house around late October. My dads an alcoholic and although many alcoholics do no harm to others (only themselves) for the past 3 years hes put me and my mum through absolute hell. Hes been taken away by police several times, 2 days ago was the recent where he was charged with breach of the peace. Anyways long story short my life was hell until he got took away. The only escape from this was my girlfriend and my close friends. Everything was great until late October and November was really rough for me. I have no idea why, but I got quite jealous of a guy in my girlfriends work - no reason to be may I add. Not only that I got paranoid about my friends secretly hating me. There werent and arent any real tell tale signs, but no matter how small, it sets me off. For example, the other night my girlfriend cancelled on me to go ice skating with her cousin this weekend. If this was any other time, I would have not been angry or paranoid at all, yet now I thought something was up. I said to her I didnt mind getting cancelled on it was just that I hadnt seen her for a week and now it seemed like i wouldnt see her till xmas ever (she had the flu and we both have a tight schedule up to xmas). I understand its a busy time and what not but somehow I seemed to feel less important to her. This then sparked off idead that she has went off me, got bored of me, wants to break up - every tiny thing she does thats not to my liking (not puting an x at the end of texts - how stupid) i get paranoid. I have never been like this in my entire life. I spoke to a real close friend about all of this and he added that maybe it was everything that was happening in my house finally catching up with me. To be honest I never ever let the whole war in my home get to me, so I guess he might be right. The whole jealous situation got resolved in the end, I told her and although she wasnt too happy we got through it and I can honestly say that I aint anymore. I understood that the whole jealousy issue was my problem and my problem alone seeing as she gave me no reason to be jealous. I mean I know she loves me and cares about me, so why am i letting all this get me down ? Another thing is that lately I keep thinking all my friends (not close friends) dont like me as much. The only real reasons for that is some of them dont talk to me as much, they dont joke around with me like they used to and it all seems too serious, like they are keeping something from me. I just cant stand that im getting paranoid, and to be honest its not like shes making it particularly hard for me to stop being so. She does not give me any valid reasons to be paranoid. Im being extremely irrational and its killing me right now. I love my girlfriend and my friends more than anything and dont wanna lose them to my problems. Has anyone got any advice ? Thankss x
Member # 37835
posted 12-17-2009 08:57 AM
This really sounds like an issue that will require some in depth counseling. This is not likely the type of thing that you can just work through on your own or with help from us here. All of it could absolutely be related to your father's behavior, but that is something that you could figure out for sure in counseling. Would you like help in finding some counseling services in your area?
Member # 31269
posted 12-17-2009 09:12 AM
Yeah that would ve great!
For now ive seemed to have calmed down andim seeing her tonight, so it seems the whole getting angry thing was for nothing. I understand its my problem and im willing to work through it. I seem to be alright now but who knows what could happen.
Member # 37835
posted 12-17-2009 01:38 PM
Okay, can you give us a location, either by posting it here, or using the "contact us" button?
Also, if you have health insurance, the best thing to do is call the insurance company to get a list of counselors they'll cover. Another option, given your situation, is to actually call up the police and ask for a list of counselors who see crime victims.
Member # 31269
posted 12-17-2009 04:27 PM
Im from Glasgow Scotland, post cod is G60 5EF. Hope this helps. Em yeah, tonight was a little weird. I felt alright at first when I went to my girlfriends but then I began to get a little erratic. I know she was ill and a little tired but she was still fine with me. Yet I couldnt get all of this out of my head. We kinda spoke about it and she knew i wasnt on top of my game. I hate talking to anyone about stuff like this let alone her, I just dont wanna seem melodramatic etc. I asked if she was alright and stuff, cause in my head she had been acting a little weird with me all week. When I say weird i mean sily things like not being as affectionate in texts (i.e saying i miss you, i love you etc). She said everything was fine and she just smiled and kissed me. I dunno it just felt a little put on. I dont wanna say that she is hiding something from me from just something as daft as that. Yet when we parted and said goodnight, she never said i love you (i did) and she normally does. Maybe im being a little insecure but I have bad thoughts in my head like im gonna lose her and the only reason shes not saying anything is cause its near xmas and shes gonna drop the bomb on me after new year. God! just looking at what ive typed makes me feel ill, its pathetic. It sounds ridiculous but its annoying me, but i guess im more annoyed at myself for getting so worked up.