T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 35244
posted 11-04-2007 04:36 PM
I've never had a relationship that was longer than a few months, and never one where I spent a ton of time around a person.
I've been thinking a lot lately about attraction and it's role in relationships. Like for instance, there have been people before who I've been instantly and very strongly physically attracted to, and I can't stop wanting to get physical with the person, but I may have lesser interest in their personality. Then there've been people who I felt sort of friendly and comfortable with, and sort of drawn towards, but maybe in a subtler way, where maybe the attraction I feel even comes and goes depending on the person's behavior. Does attraction divide itself that way for other people? Does intense attraction generaly wear off over time, and if so, does that mean that maybe the latter kind of attraction actually makes for better serious relationships? If you don't relate to my descriptions, then what does attraction feel like for you? [ 11-04-2007, 04:39 PM: Message edited by: SFgrrrl ]
Member # 17971
posted 11-04-2007 05:38 PM
I think it depends on the person. I've definitely found some people attractive that I wouldn't want anything long-term with, it was more of a physical thing. I've also experienced the other type you described, which usually happens with new friends.
I've been with my partner for nearly 5 years and I think I feel the same attraction for him now as I did when we first got together. If anything, it's gotten deeper and stronger, because now we are able to be more physically affectionate due to circumstances changing.
Member # 33148
posted 11-10-2007 10:30 PM
I think I'm with faifai on this one. I've been dating my boyfriend for two years and sometimes yes, I've had moments where I'm just not attracted to him, but those are usually rare. My very first relationship was intense as far as attraction went, and very frustrating b/c the guy never touched me.
I'd say as time went on, my boyfriend and I only became more strongly attracted to one another. You get to face all sorts of challenges over time with the other person and show yourself through them and those shared experiences grow and strengthen the couple and their mutual attraction. At least that's my theory. =)