T O P I C R E V I E W
eep_a_mouse
Member # 8796
posted 08-05-2002 10:27 AM
the other day i found some dirty pictures of my ex's girlfriend on the computer. i confronted him and he said he doesnt look at them. i feel really upset that he is keeping them and i feel like our relationship isnt quite as special now. i dont know if im just being silly but i keep thinking about these pictures and upsetting myself. my sister says i should delete them and my friend says i should move them somewhere he wont be able to find them but im not sure that its a good idea... what should i do? i wish i could forget about it. any advice?
logic_grrl
Member # 8067
posted 08-05-2002 11:10 AM
Deleting or hiding someone else's computer files without their permission seems like a bad idea. But why not let your boyfriend know that you're uncomfortable with him keeping the pictures, and ask him if he'd be willing to delete them (since he says he never looks at them anyway)?
You might be doing his ex a favour too - she might not be too happy with the thought of her ex-boyfriend still having "dirty" pictures of her which are available to anyone who uses that computer .
confused333
Member # 6450
posted 08-05-2002 11:23 AM
You shouldn't go behind his back and delete them or move them or anything.Just ask him to delete them, and if he refused you know that he probably still looks at them.
Don't worry, it would upset me too.
------------------ Why does a rose represent love, when a rose always dies??
Friends are like condoms, they help out when things get hard.
SirenRose
Member # 8384
posted 08-05-2002 06:41 PM
going behind his back and deleting is files is definately not a good idea. that deals with the whole trust thing. he will think that u don't trust the fact that he doesn't look at them or what not. and might be upset with you. so tell him it upsets you and that u would like it if would delete the pictures, and if doesn't look a them it will free up some space on his hardrive! ;-)------------------ ~*your winning me over with everything u say...you rip my heart right out...and when i let you closer i only want you closer...you rip me apart...
Gumdrop Girl
Member # 568
posted 08-06-2002 10:22 PM
definitely don't mess with his computer without his consent. but if the jpgs bother you so much, do make it a point to say so. and make it super crystal clear that you disapprove. then he can decide which is more important; you or the old pictures. imho, if he's got any sort of respect, he'll delete the pictures. if not, well, you deserve someone more respectful.------------------ "In God we trust. All others must pay cash ..." faw-choon kookie say.
Gumdrop Girl
Member # 568
posted 08-06-2002 10:24 PM
wait a minute, if those pix are of his ex and she's under 18, can't that get him in a big, fat load of trouble anyway (kiddie porn charges)?------------------ "In God we trust. All others must pay cash ..." faw-choon kookie say.
fae
Member # 9420
posted 08-07-2002 01:35 PM
i totally understand what you're going through..happened to me too. makes you feel like he's still thinking about her and doesn't like you as much right? well first of all tell him to delete them, it doesn't matter if you're being too pushy, if he can't except the way you feel he's not worthy anyway and if he does you know she's not even going through his mind anymore. ex's are ex's and they're just past relationships. they ended for a reason and right now it's you he's totally in to.
Foozball
Member # 9458
posted 08-09-2002 01:13 PM
I don't know how old you guys are, but if you're over 18, maybe you could buy him a couple, err, nudie magazines. If he denies still being infatuated with his ex, and he seems to be really into YOU, then maybe it isn't a matter of an old flame, but a matter of... hormones! There really isn't any reason he should be keeping those photos if he's broken up with her, but maybe he just gets turned on by that sort of thing. I could be wrong. :P
mistress_monkey
Member # 7467
posted 08-10-2002 12:27 AM
i really don't think it should be her responsibility to make sure her boyfriend has a constant supply of porno. she should not feel any pressure to give an erotic environment, and he certainly shouldn't use the excuse that he enjoys looking at nude women to keep the pictures, especially against the will of his present girlfriend and probably his ex girlfriend. and if it IS a valid excuse, i'd be worried about him keeping his "hormones" in check. if he can't control them enough to erase a few nudie pics off his computer, what else will he do that he "can't control"?
i seriously think you need to talk this out with him, because i'm really getting a bad feeling about the whole situation. if he can't respect you enough to get rid of them, than you deserve better.
good luck!!!!
------------------ Hail Eris! KaAAIXTI! All hail Discordia! 23 Skidoo!
"If you're going to be a non-conformist, you're going to have to wear the uniform."