T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 8263
posted 06-04-2002 07:33 PM
Well me and my boyfriend were on bad terms and we were not talking because of something that happened. Well one night we were on the phone and we were talking over our problems when suddenly he called my grandmother a B**** and he said "F*** you" to me and he knows that saying F*** you to me is like my worst enemy hitting me. I feel strong about someone saying that to me. Now in school he walks around upset like I did something to him when I'm the one who got hurt i this situation. I feel real bad and depressed because were breaking up. Whats a girl to do?
We've been through so much hell and I've put up with all of it am I a fool?
Member # 5508
posted 06-04-2002 08:31 PM
Hunny, I'm really sorry. That phrase really upsets me too.
I think you two need to stop avoiding each other. Here's what I suggest- I know that you're very upset and it won't be easy to talk to him in person or on the phone about this. What'd I'd do is write him an email or a note and explain that you're really upset with him because he KNEW how you felt about that phrase, and he said it anyways. I wouldn't do anything rash just yet; like breaking up with him. I'd wait to see what he has to say for himself, and if he doesn't say something along the lines of "I am so sorry for saying that/ It just slipped out/ I didn't mean to hurt you/ I knew how you feel about that phrase and I'm sorry for still using it" If he doesn't say something like that, I personally would dump his ass. It's just complete disregard for your feelings.
I hope this helps. Hang in there. Don't take crap from boys just cuz they're cute
Member # 384
posted 06-04-2002 08:32 PM
Just a note...it would have saved bandwidth to simply add on to your previous thread.
No, you aren't a fool. However, it does sound like you're somebody in a lousy relationship and it's time to do some hard thinking.
Is your boyfriend treating you how you'd like to be treated? I think the answer to that is pretty clear. Have you communicated to him that you're unhappy and is he likely to change? Would you be better off without him, spending your summer having fun with your friends and family?
Breaking up is tough, I know, and only you can decide what is the right course for you to take. I'd suggest you re-read some of the things you've posted here and then decide what you want to do. You can't control how your boyfriend is acting, but you can darn well choose how you want to respond.
Member # 8298
posted 06-06-2002 12:25 AM
I agree with
Miss Thang. I think that a note may be the best way to being the end of your fighting. However, there are two thing that I want to mention, should you decide that is the best course of action:
(1) In your note, don't use "You..." sentences. For example, instead of saying, "You never want to talk to me when I want to talk and alway have to have things your way," say, "
I feel like..." That way, he won't interpret your note as being accusatory, instead he will (hopefully) realize that you are hurting because of what is going on between you.
(2) Even though I think that a note would be a good start at ending your fighting, try to decide whether or not you think its very healthy to be in a relationship with someone who you are unable to talk to face to face. If you love him and want to be with him, and he feels the same, I hope you can come to an understand about what your expectations about your future means of communication will be.