T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 5892
posted 11-30-2001 10:35 PM
Ok! My boyfriend and I have been dating almost 9 months and I want to get him something for Christmas but I don't know what to get him he is 18 years old. I know that he wants a neckle lace but I really don't have the money for one so what do I do? He also thought me that I wasn't going to get anything for my B-Day (which is in a few days) or Christmas but I think that he was jokeing so what do I do. Do I get him something and just not give it to him tell he gives me mine or do I just buy him a gift and give it to him so show him that I care?? Please Help
la jaunty bohemian
Member # 5735
posted 11-30-2001 11:26 PM
I'd like to share something my mom told me once... gifts aren't contracts. They are given freely and require no payback. So giving your boyfriend a gift or getting one in return doesn't have to be seen as an obligation to give something in return.
That said.. while giving things [and receiving things] can be really fun, it doesn't mean that love is confirmed. It ain't a material thing like that.
As for gift ideas- what does he like to do? Get him a gift certificate to a place he shops at, or invite him out for a day in the city. Plan activities for the both of you! Make him something; get crafty.
The best gifts aren't neccessairly the most expensive ones.
"You're going to find that many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view" -Obi Wan Kenobi, Return of the Jedi
Member # 589
posted 11-30-2001 11:32 PM
If your boyfriend wants a necklace but you can't afford it, then get him something else. There must be something else he wants or something else you'd like to get him. So give it some thought then go shopping or make it.
quote: Do I get him something and just not give it to him tell he gives me mine or do I just buy him a gift and give it to him so show him that I care?? IMHO, if you really care then you should get him a present "just because" or because you know he'd enjoy receiving it, not so that you can get one in return. Presents aren't really necessary to show that you care; it shouldn't be some sort of proof, although it's still quite a nice gesture.
If you don't want to get him a present then don't. However, if you do want to get him a gift and then give it to him, then do so. But I don't think you should get him a gift and hold on to it until you get yours. Personally, I don't think that's such a "good relationship" thing to do, but that's just how I am.
Member # 589
posted 11-30-2001 11:34 PM
Good advice, jaunty.