T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 2101
posted 01-18-2001 05:10 PM
I love my boyfriend to death but he has the nasty habit. *shutters* He smokes! Yuck! It's so nasty. He says it's had to quite and he gets really sick without smoking for more then two days. Now I'm starting to smell like smoke because I guess he forgets I hate it and lights one right next to me. I need some methods on how to get him to stop! The guilty trip doesn't work so I don't know what to do!!!
P.S. Did I mention my birthday was on tuesday?
~*~Buff Chick~*~ *kiss*kiss* to my Karamel Kid!
"No one can stop you from who you
love and the one love is who you love."
"Never frown because you never know when someone is falling in love with your smile."
Watch out! I'm a awful speller. *hehe*
[This message has been edited by CallMeBuffChick (edited 01-18-2001).]
Member # 1071
posted 01-18-2001 07:22 PM
Haha, happy birthday honey.
How long has he been smoking? Because, the way you put it, he gets sick from stopping for a few days. So, he's developed a severe dependency on nicotine, or he's lying. Either way, get him to buy some nicotine supplements, to wean him off cigarettes. Like, Nicotine patches or gum. Then, ease your way onto plain gum, so he has something in his mouth besides cancer-causing cigarettes.
If he won't o on the gum or patch, leave him. If he loves you more than lung cancer, he'll quit. Besides, do you really want all that second hand smoke?
Mens' magazines feature pictures of naked women. Womens' magazines feature picture of naked women. This is beacuse the female body is beautiful and delicate, while the male body is lumpy and hairy and should not be seen by the light of day.
Member # 2059
posted 01-18-2001 07:54 PM
urg, I am in the exact same situation w/ my guy. Well, maybe not exactly the same - my guy smokes, and I don't like it, but it's not so much the smell of smoke as the fact that it makes me worry about him. Still, I know what you mean about smoky smelling clothes - it's so gross - yesterday i wanted to wear a sweater to dinner w/ my grandpa and I couldn't because it smelled gross. Ugh.
So it's annoying yeah, but I love him and I think it would be a waste to break up with him because of a habit that he had before we got together, you know? I don't want him to change me, so what right do I have to make him quit if he doesn't want to? It's like him saying he would dump me if I didn't stop biting my nails. See what I'm saying? It's all part of the equal footing thing. But if you ask him not to, he shouldn't smoke when he's around you. Maybe he just forgets? My guy does sometimes; it's a habit, and it's easy to do things like that unconsciously. Just keep on reminding him, but don't get mad. I doubt he really likes smoking, if he's telling the truth about trying to quit and it making him sick. You could ask if there's anything you could do to help him quit, and tell him it worries you. Also I know one thing that makes Ben not smoke so much when I'm around is that although I don't smoke regularly, I smoke more when I'm with him because he's smoking...and he doesn't like me doing that, you know? It's not a good thing to do.
Hope I could be of some help - tell me how it goes.
Member # 1514
posted 01-18-2001 09:17 PM
im in the same situation too. my husband smokes and i cant stand it. he has tried to quit and cant for long. he will quit for a couple of weeks and then start back again. it is really annoying.
Member # 2050
posted 01-18-2001 10:49 PM
My guy smokes too but I am honestly fine with it.
I used to make alot of noise about it but we just ended up quarrelling. More like me shouting and he keeping quiet but anyways.
I guess I just learnt to accept the fact that it is his body and he can ingest whatever he wants to. Of course, 90% of my friends smoke so I'm more open about him smoking.
But he knows that if we were to have a future together, he will have to stop. Plus he has a limit when he smokes. He only smokes maximum 5 sticks a day unless he goes clubbing or something so I trust him.
If it really upsets you that he smokes, help him to stop. Gradually. I have never seen a smoker who could stop immediately. Ask him to gradually cut down and be supportive about it. He is going through withdrawal symptoms and that is really tough so he really needs you.
In the meantime, why not do stuff that doesn't involve or allow smoking. Like cycling, walking around in the mall. Is smoking allowed in public places in the States? Coz it's banned almost everywhere here.
And no, the guilt trip doesn't work. It just makes the both of you feel bad but nothing actually comes out of it. Just get him to gradually cut down or tell him not to smoke when he is with you. That should cut down the number of sticks already. All the best hon. Hope it all works out.
Member # 2403
posted 01-19-2001 05:08 PM
I want my boyfriend to quit as well. He's not getting any younger, and he's developed a nasty cough. He even coughs in his sleep.
He won't quit until he's ready, though, so I've just learned to accept it.
Member # 783
posted 01-21-2001 01:46 AM
well hunnie, tell you da truth...im a smoker & i noe dat some people hate it whn i smoke!
it hard 2 stop smoking bcoz itz a habit! & a very bad 1 too!
tell your guy dat u r sik of da smell! u need 2 tell da truth! if he cares...he will not smoke in front of u!
Member # 2322
posted 01-23-2001 12:46 PM
Get him some of that gum that has the nicatine They have it out in Orange flavor now or so they say.
Member # 1515
posted 01-23-2001 01:27 PM
I was lucky, well I met my boyfriend and he did smoke, but once we started going out, he quit!!!! Yes, just for me! It was so nice. And he used to do pot
and he hasnt done it since we have been together! Oh hes so sweet doing all these things for me. Me, I have never ever smoked or ever ever did pot, I never even tried any of these things. All my friends are proud and they tell me never to try it. Most of my friends smoke, but I just never go into that habit. I never wanted to taste or smell like smoke...yuckys. Plus, my grandma and aunt died from smoking Ive learned my lesson, by my family members.
*~*~*~I LOVE YOU BOB FOREVER AND ALWAYS*~*~*~ *~*~12/3/99*~*~* "The first time I saw you, I knew that I would fall for you, & now that were together, our love will last forever!!" -By: The person I LOVE MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD!!