T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 8796
posted 06-11-2003 10:46 AM
I know i have asked advice here before and the answer has been to finish my relationship.
My boyfriend is lovely and we have had a good relationship for about a year and a half now except for one thing. He has lost his temper and become violent with me on about 9 occaisions ( thats an average of every 2 months). He always says hes sorry ( i do believe him) but i tell him its not good enough.Its not like he does it for fun its in the heat of arguments, so i dont want to split but i have started to wonder if i should try laying into him so he see's what its like....advice would be much appreciated
Member # 961
posted 06-11-2003 11:34 AM
If violent partners ever said that yep, they were glad about what they did, and they really quite enjoyed causing pain and trauma, do you really think anyone would stay with a violent partner? Men and women who abuse have their methods of making what they do seem like the victim's fault, of justifying their actions, of keeping someone who's little more to them than a human punching bag coming back for more. You don't deserve to be with someone who treats you like this; you need to leave him now, and seek legal help if he tries to pursue the relationship.
We've some articles on abuse you might want to read at:
http://www.scarleteen.com/crisis/abuse.html and http://www.scarleteen.com/crisis/hollie.html
Milke, with an L, SSBD, RATS, TMNTP, MF, CWCD, DNFTF
The night we met I knew I needed you so And if I had the chance I'd never let you go
Member # 5375
posted 06-11-2003 01:24 PM
I'd like to add that you being violent towards him is only going to make matters worse. In other words, if violence is the problem how is more violence going to be a solution. I'm with Milke on this one -- leaving is the safest and sanest option.
Here are a few threads from the
Relationships FAQ that may be helpful: Abuse and Abusive Relationships http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum3/HTML/000902.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum3/HTML/001942.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum3/HTML/002032.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum3/HTML/002747.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum9/HTML/000019.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum9/HTML/000369.html http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum9/HTML/000518.html