T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 107720
posted 08-02-2013 08:08 PM
Hi this is my second time on the site, and i just want to say thank you for your time and effort to replying. You guys are really helpful and reliable.
So here goes with my paranoia/over-worrying incident. Yesterday i was with my one of my close guy friends, we used to date back then and mess around. I guess the reason why im worrying is because hes the type of guy that fools around with girls and doesnt have a fear in the world of getting a girl pregnant. Hes had unprotected sex countless times,and objects to his actions by saying hes confident enough that he wont get anyone pregnant! So as you can see, this is why we broke up. And ever since we did, it seems as if his sexual desires have got worse. To the point where he might have got another gal pregnant. Above all this, im worried because stupidly. We hung out yesterday at my place and i was wearing denim shorts, spandex, and underwear, he was wearing boxers and denim jeans. He tried getting me to mess around with him (give him a bj) but i kept saying NO. But as stubborn as he is, he pulled out his woody in the open air and a drop of precum was leaking out of it.I gave him a hand job, touched the precum, then realizing what i did i immediately ran and washed my hands. I covered his woody with his boxers, and i could clearly see the wetness seeping through. He still insisted, but eventually gave up and put it back in his pants. I handled his woody from outside his jeans, but felt kinda moist since his precum MIGHT have seeped through from his boxers to his jeans. Maybe it was sweat. Idk. Point is, as i was doing that i kept pulling down the short spandex i had under my shorts since they kept rising up near the walls of my vagina (the spandex basically becoming like an underwear) So as i kept doing that my question is: If i had touched a wet spot on his jeans, and then put down my rising spandex with the same fingers does that pose a risk of pregnancy? Im worried because the spandex was rising near the walls of my vagina, and what if my fingers touched any area near that. (since touching any area near the vagina poses a risk) Also does touching my spandex absorb anything that was on my fingers? I also recall that my fingers werent wet, but if they were does that still pose a risk? *our gentials were never naked during this scenario* I sound crazy i know, but as i described in the situation above, hes a guy that should be off limits. And i stupidly went against them. I just need a peace of mind, and ive read your articles which are helpful, but i just want a personal opinion/advice from someone. Regarding the situation with him, and the pregnanacy scare. Thank you, your response is appreciated.
Member # 25425
posted 08-02-2013 08:56 PM
None of what you are saying sounds crazy or stupid, Anne. There is no reason to put yourself down.
Have you seen this article yet? That should help you understand why there is no pregnancy risk in the situation you describe: Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That? It also sounds like this guy is bad news all around, and like he was not being respectful of you at all by pressuring you into those activities. Maybe it is time to limit your exposure to this man?
Member # 107720
posted 08-02-2013 09:14 PM
Thanks Joey, and yes ive tried but hes just bad all around. And somehow, i keep running back to him stupidly, just how i did in the above scenario. We dated for about a year and he never pressured me but as the relationship progressed, he was what he called "advancing" and i was not moving at all. He wanted to have sex, and i did too, but something always stopped me (i always had a bad feeling of him) and i didnt have that kind of trust towards him.
But about the article, yes i have seen it before and read it multiple times. And i guess my scenario doesnt pose a risk. I just get paranoid if i had any precum in my fingers from his jeans, but like i have read before on these threads, it would have had to been fresh and dripping wet to pose a risk right? and in this case, i just touched the wet spot on his jeans. And stupidly has to adjust my really short spandex haha. So no worries here?
Member # 25425
posted 08-02-2013 11:11 PM
It sounds like your clothes never came off? If so, you really do not need to worry about a pregnancy risk.
Do you need some help in setting boundaries with this guy?
Member # 107720
posted 08-03-2013 12:33 AM
When you say help in setting boundaries, what do you mean? And what kind of help?
Member # 20094
posted 08-03-2013 02:37 AM
Setting boundaries basically means deciding what you are and are not comfortable with, and communicating that to other people. If you need some help coming up with ways to stick to your limits with this person, we can help you with that.