T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 58116
posted 05-06-2013 11:19 PM
Since I can't seem to find a good website for BDSM safety tips, is it ok if I ask on here?
My partner and I love for her to hold my wrists down during sex - the harder, the more fun for us! But now I have bruising and soreness where she was holding me. It doesn't seem like there is a way to avoid this? I don't like to be cuffed or tied with rope, prefer her bare hands on me, and me "struggling" to get free. Is it ok to just take tylenol the day after we play like this? Or will there be permanent injuries?
Member # 90293
posted 05-07-2013 07:04 AM
This is more of a physical health question, and a little outside our scope as we're not orthopedists. In general, though, if one does something frequently that results in bruising and soreness the likelihood of permanent damage is increased. If one does those things every once in a while, the risk of permanent damage is reduced, but not necessarily eliminated. One thing to also consider is that joints are the most susceptible to injury, so if she's putting pressure directly on your wrist joints, that could, yes, lead to injury. I agree it's tough to find good, reliable, respectful Web sites providing BDsM education, but there are some excellent books out there. Have you read any of them? If not, would you like some recommendations?
Member # 3
posted 05-07-2013 10:21 AM
Really, in general, if you're getting bruised or it hurts when someone does it, you want to either avoid it or figure out a way to minimize those things.
For example, it might be that your partner can hold you less intensely, but that you two role-play the "struggle" a bit more than it being a real thing, if you follow me. Or, it might be that you two can try her holding you in a less delicate area of your arms, like holding your forearms or upper arms, where you don't have a whole bunch of smaller bones and more delicate tendons.
Member # 58116
posted 05-07-2013 08:16 PM
It's frustrating because I enjoy the fact that it hurts when we do it, just not the day afterwards!
Yes, I am open to book recommendations. (Although what I've browsed before tends to have advice about tying or restraining people with various instruments like rope, cuffs, tape, etc, which isn't what I'm interested in.)