T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 95997
posted 03-24-2013 07:22 PM
Two (somewhat) unrelated questions but figured I'd throw them into one post. I hope that's okay here...
Backstory: I've been seeing this guy for about a month. At the moment, we're not officially in an exclusive relationship but it seems to be progressing in that direction and neither of us are actually sleeping with/seeing anyone else. We're both in our mid 20's and have slept with other people before. We've also both been tested recently and are clean. That being said, we also always use condoms for pregnancy prevention (and, since we aren't yet exclusive, it's practical for other reasons too). On to the questions... Went out with him Friday night, then came back to my place and had fairly drunk, fairly rough penis-in-vagina sex twice that night (missionary and me on top) as well as lots of oral and fingering. It might be worth throwing in here that my period had ended a day prior to this. Anyways, after the second round, I went to go pee and wiped to find bright red blood--didn't look like period blood, and as I said, it had ended the day before (though my period is very light, so towards the end especially, it wouldn't be the first time that I thought it was over to find that it actually wasn't). I always get super wet with him and we use lubricated condoms, so I can't imagine that being an issue. By the next day, it had stopped entirely and we had sex again without incident, though it wasn't anywhere near as rough. I did notice I was a little sore but it was also a little rougher than I'm used to (but that's fine with me). Should I be concerned about this? Next question!! As this relationship is progressing, I'm beginning to consider alternative birth control. I'm not a huge fan of condoms because I do like to go down on the guy sometimes after sex and then they just taste like latex. I'm also likely mildly allergic to latex (I work in science and wear gloves all the time at work--if I don't wear non-latex gloves, my hands do get itchy as the day progresses). With previous partners, I've noticed that if I'm not super well lubricated before proceeding with entry, I will get a little itchy down there as well. Nothing horrendous but, if avoidable, that's preferred. Non-latex condoms are, obviously, the most obvious solution but they are harder to find and the higher breakage rates that I remember learning about back in sex ed make them less than ideal. So, thoughts? Suggestions? I am toying with the idea of going back on birth control. I was on it for a decent bit of high school and college but I remember my periods being miserable compared to what they are now (we're talking 7 days of cramping and heavy flow compared to 1 day of cramps and heaviness and two days of what amounts to spotting. You can see my reluctance to lose what I've got here). But it does seem like the most logical choice. I'd still want condoms until we were definitely exclusive but that seems to be a bridge we're getting close to crossing.
Member # 90293
posted 03-24-2013 09:01 PM
The bleeding you experienced after intercourse could be a variety of things: 1. As you suggested, it could have been Your period stilltapering off. 2. It could have been an abbrasion from the friction of intercourse. 3. It's possible there wasn't enough lubrication, particularly since sometimes after alcohol consumption the body doesn't lubricate the same way, so, again, there could have been a small abbrasion. Small amounts of bleeding that occasionally occur after intercourse aren't generally anything to worry about. The vagina and vulva are like any other part of the body; they will sometimes get sore, or bleed from friction or pressure. Does this help? With regards to birth control and safer sex, there is, to my knowledge, no evidence that non-latex condoms such as those made from polyurethane are more prone to breakage than latex condoms. So, these certainly are an option if you'd like to see how your body does with a non-latex option. In addition, while it's not best for use during intercourse, some people find that using a flavoured lubricaant during oral sex with condoms can help with the taste and texture. When you say that you were on birth control, I think you're saying that you were on the birth control pill. There are many birth control options, both hormonal and non-hormonal, so there is no reason you should have to go back to having unpleasant monthly bleeds. The best way to find an option that will work well for you and not give you unpleasant side effects is to talk with your sexual healthcare provider, who will take a history and discuss your options with you. Before doing that, though, if you'd like to look through your options, we have a handy list of them here, complete with how they work, their effectiveness rates, and lots of other helpful information. Birth Control Bingo! If you'd like to discuss any of these options, or have questions about them, we can certainly talk about them. :
Member # 95997
posted 03-26-2013 07:39 PM
Thanks! It does help--especially to calm my fears about the bleeding.
Honestly, the most appealing method for me is an IUD in some form because I don't anticipate wanting to have children anytime in the near future (will be starting a PhD program in the next year and know I definitely want to wait until I'm near the end before I even start considering starting a family) but the heavier periods scare me away. So, in that sense, the Mirena seems delightful but I see it's primarily aimed at people who have had at least one child?
Member # 90293
posted 03-26-2013 09:18 PM
IUDs aren't just for people who have been pregnant before. There is a slightly higher risk for someone who has never been pregnant that their body will expel the IUD, but this doesn't occur frequently enough to mean that an IUD absolutely is not an option. This link should shed s some light on that: http://www.managingcontraception.com/qa/questions.php?questionid=1334 A healthcare provider can evaluate whether an IUD is a sound choice for you based on your needs and your health history, and discuss the pros and cons. If a healthcare provider tells you that it's not an option because you've never been pregnant, again, know that that isn't correct.