T O P I C R E V I E W
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 09-20-2012 11:11 PM
Hi! I had my last period begin in late August (Around in the 20th I believe) and since then I have had sex a few times, all with condoms , with my boyfriend. The first few times, there wasn't full insertion because it was too painful. However, once I was able to take more, I noticed he would put the condom on wrong, flip it inside out, then I would mount him (generally, this would be done after I performed oral). Not long after, and way before he finished, I would dismount in pain. There have only been three instances where he finished inside me, with a condom. He would pull out once he finished. That occurred within the last few weeks. There has never been any direct genital contact made without a condom on. I should be expecting my period soon, but my paranoia of pregnancy is getting the best of me.I'm afraid my stress of not knowing whether I am pregnant will delay my period... causing more stress. Anyway, a couple days ago, I was having brown discharge. Now I am having really watery, clear discharge as well as some bloating and mild cramping. I am used to mild cramping before my period. However, I cannot remember for the life of me (in this stressed panic I'm in) whether or not that kind of discharge happens normally... I'm thinking it does. I feel like I am over analyzing everything. I have read a lot on line researching this kind of watery discharge, that it's normal and everything, before a period. But sites also claimed that it was an early sign of pregnancy... among other things. Do you think I have any reason to be worried?
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 09-21-2012 01:17 AM
Also, I read on this site that pre-ejaculate doesn't necessarily have sperm when he urinates or hasn't ejaculated in a long while... This applies to my situation as well.
September
Member # 25425
posted 09-21-2012 02:40 AM
I'd say, at this point, that your best bet is to just wait for your period to show. Discharge is normal all throughout the cycle, and spotting right before a period is also very normal. So, I'd not do anything right now (including worrying ) and just wait for your period. For future reference, though: if a condom is put on the wrong way, you'll want to use a fresh one, rather than just flipping the old one inside out. I'm going to link you to our article on condoms so you can make sure you know how to use condoms correctly.Condom Basics: A User's Manual Also, intercourse doesn't have to be painful. Have you seen this article yet?From OW! to WOW! Demystifying Painful Intercourse
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 09-22-2012 11:48 PM
So, you don't think I have so much of a risk I should worry? And also, when is it safe to take a pregnancy test... for my sanity's sake.
September
Member # 25425
posted 09-23-2012 02:37 AM
Well, worrying isn't very productive, so that's not something I would suggest It sounds like the closest you have come to genital contact or contact with ejaculate is the pre-ejaculate from the inside-out-condom. So, there is a risk with that, but it's pretty small, especially if you say that your partnre had urinated since the last ejaculation. You can take a pregnancy test at 14 days after the risk, or as soon as a period is late. Whichever comes first.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 09-23-2012 08:46 PM
Okay thank you! Also, I have hears multiple times and from multiple people that losing your virginity/having sex after a long time of not, affects your period. Is this at all true?
Robin Lee
Member # 90293
posted 09-23-2012 09:01 PM
No, there is no evidence that we know of that shows that having vaginal intercourse, either for the first time ever or for the first time after a long period of not having it, will impact the menstrual cycle in any way (assuming of course that it doesn't lead to pregnancy, which affects the menstrual cycle by stopping it). If someone experiences a lot of stress and worry around that sexual experience, whether it's about the experience itself, fear of pregnancy, or something else entirely, that could affect one's cycle, but that's true of any sort of stress, and isn't limited to a first experience with intercourse.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 09-23-2012 10:54 PM
Ah okay, that's what I figured. Thanks a bunch!
Robin Lee
Member # 90293
posted 09-24-2012 05:54 AM
You're most welcome.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 01:21 PM
I don't mean to bring this post back up but... I still haven't gotten my period, and it has been about 40 days since my last. I took a pregnancy test on the September 28th, which was more than two weeks after the supposed incident I am worried about. It came out negative. I have been researching ovulation and being able to tell through discharge. Based on that, I think I ovulated maybe a week ago, but I'm not sure. Does the stress I experienced of a pregnancy prevent the actual ovulation from happening, or just the uterine lining coming off? I don't really know what to do.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 01:23 PM
Correction: 44 days.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 01:27 PM
In order to be able to figure out when you're ovulating, a person will usually need to be charting for at least a few months. The way we do or don't manage stress can have an impact on either ovulation or menstruation: on any part of our fertility or menstrual cycles, really. It's been 40 days since your last period: how long are your cycles normally? It really sounds like right now there's nothing to do or that you need to do: you've taken a pregnancy test, you know you're not pregnant. Sometimes we'll get later periods, shifts to our cycles, even skipped periods.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 02:08 PM
Normally, my periods generally come at the end/beginning of everymonth however last time it came a little earlier than expected. I found that my period at times comes when I don't expect it. And I stopped using Nuvaring in February/March and there was a time I skipped a period altogether. At least from what I can recall, I don't think I have just skipped a period. And as for the pregnancy test, I took one though it wasn't in the first urination of the day. I took it around noon.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 02:55 PM
Okay. Well, first up, for someone with regular periods? They're actually NOT going to come around the same date for very many months, mostly because the number of days in each month varies. When someone with pretty regular periods charts them for a year or two, most often what they'll see is a few months where it's around the same date, then a jump sometimes, sometimes radically. I wish I knew how many days each of your cycles was, rather than when in a month you've noticed them happening: then we could have some idea of if you're even late at all right now. HPTs aren't only effective with first urine. You can take them any time of day.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 02:56 PM
If any of that was WTF? for you, this link might help: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/my_period_is_late_or_is_it
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 03:07 PM
I read that article that you linked, and based off the example you gave, I would say 28-30 day cycle would be it for me. My last period began on August 20th.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 03:30 PM
Well, if it was, then probably only for the last few months has it happened on the dates you listed, and didn't happen on those dates the last time. I also hear you saying in your post before this one that you've often had your period come at times you're not expecting it. So, in a word: maybe it is late this time around, or you've been shifting to a longer cycle without really noticing. or maybe it's not. But you've tested recently, with negative results. You can certainly test again in another week if you want to make sure, but otherwise, unless you've got other funky stuff going on -- any kind of abdominal pain, general ill-health symptoms -- one late or missed period isn't usually cause to see a healthcare provider. A couple or a few? Yeah. But not one. So I'd just do what you can to chill out, take care of yourself and try and relax about this. And obviously, too, if you're feeling like condoms and withdrawal aren't methods that leave you feeling okay enough about preventing pregnancy, maybe now is the time to look into a method to back up your condoms with that's more effective than withdrawal, like an IUD or hormonal method. Okay?
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 05:00 PM
I have gotten hormonal birth control, Beyaz, a couple weeks ago. My doctor wanted me to wait until I started my period, then Sunday start. As of now, I think I have contracted a bit of a cold a few days that I am trying to fight off. But I had no signs of illness when I took the pregnancy test.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 05:01 PM
Did your doctor say why they wanted you to wait?
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 05:06 PM
She didn't say specifically why I should. I assumed that perhaps I was supposed to be starting soon, she wanted me to go ahead and wait for my period. Other than that, I don't know why.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 05:13 PM
So, sounds like it wasn't about a health issue. Just so you know, then, in general, starting the pill that way usually does two things: 1) It's fully effective sooner, and 2) A user usually experiences less spotting and less disruption to the menstrual cycles they already have in terms of timing. But a person can start the pill at any time, they just will need to use a backup method (if they don't already, or aren't planning to, period) for longer, and might have more spotting or less predictable withdrawal bleeds for the first pack or two.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 05:15 PM
So should I go ahead and start taking the pill tomorrow or should I go ahead and wait? She told me also to continue with back up method for a month after I begin the pill, to be safe.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 05:22 PM
It's really up to you. I mean, with the backup, given how worried you are about pregnancy, I'd stick with using condoms with your pill no matter what (plus, the pill doesn't do anything to help prevent STIs and other infections). So, that's that bit. I'd say the only other consideration here is that since you're worried now about waiting on your period, starting the pill now might just extend how long you're bothered by this. But really, either way is fine, so it's just up to you.
Anieke5656
Member # 97424
posted 10-03-2012 05:27 PM
Okay! Thanks a lot. I really appreciate it! I think I would be nuts without this amazing site and community!
Heather
Member # 3
posted 10-03-2012 05:31 PM
Glad to help.