T O P I C R E V I E W
SnowFlower
Member # 95298
posted 03-16-2012 08:02 PM
Hi, I'm new here and I was hoping someone could help me out. My friend and I have decided we want to have sex. We're both virgins so I thought he should try fingering me first. But every time he tries to put a finger in my vagina it hurts a lot. I'm really relaxed so I'm not sure why this is happening. Also, he tried giving me oral but it just felt a bit painful instead of pleasurable. Is there something we're doing wrong?
September
Member # 25425
posted 03-17-2012 10:45 AM
Are you very sexually attracted to your boyfriend? When you get ready to engage in sexual activity, do make sure that you are in the mood and feeling aroused? Do you use lots of lube and go very slowly?
September
Member # 25425
posted 03-17-2012 10:50 AM
Also, how are you doing for reproductive health care? Have you been seen by a gynecologist recently?
SnowFlower
Member # 95298
posted 03-17-2012 11:27 AM
I am pretty attracted to him, and I think I feel sexually aroused. We haven't tried using lube, so I'll mention that next time. I haven't been to a gynecologist before my pediatrician said I can continue going to her until I'm 22 (I'm 20 right now.) I've tried exploring by myself but I can never get my finger beyond the entrance of my vagina without feeling a wall and pain. Thanks so much for helping me out!
Heather
Member # 3
posted 03-17-2012 12:02 PM
When you're trying masturbation on your own, are you also feeling pain with ANY way of touching your vulva, like when rubbing your external clitoris? Or is the pain just with anything with vaginal entry? (You say you're also having pain with oral sex, but I don't know if he's engaging your vaginal opening with that at all.)
SnowFlower
Member # 95298
posted 03-17-2012 12:05 PM
When I'm touching my external clitoris, it sort of tingles but doesn't hurt or feel amazingly good. It's only when I try to put a finger into my vaginal opening that it hurts.
SnowFlower
Member # 95298
posted 03-17-2012 12:14 PM
Sorry for the double post, I didn't see your second question until I had already replied. No, he isn't near my vaginal opening during oral.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 03-17-2012 12:17 PM
Hrm. It's perplexing to me, then, that you're also having pain with oral sex. That's just odd if you're not feeling it with masturbation and your vulva. (Unless the deal is that you're simply not feeling good or feeling pain with ANY kind of genital sex with your partner: that suggests this probably isn't a physical issue, but an interpersonal one.) So, for sure, sounds like this is something to take to whoever you see for sexual healthcare first and see what they say.
SnowFlower
Member # 95298
posted 03-17-2012 12:23 PM
Okay. Thanks for all your help! I'll make an appointment to go see my doctor.