T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 43246
posted 08-12-2009 08:08 PM
Hey, I was just wondering about something that I hope someone can provide feedback on and help me ease my terribly stressed out mind. I was worried about a possible pregnancy risk, which I was told was not a risk, in the thread "Terrified Yet Again." I know I was needlessly worrying in the first place, but getting some feedback on this would really help me just forget about this whole thing.
My question is if you got into a situation that you thought could cause pregnancy and then get your normal, regular menstrual period two days after that incident, is there any way you could fall pregnant? I know you can't have a period and be pregnant, but I didn't know about this situation because of the closeness of the incident and the day I started menstruating. I didn't know if there was anyway I could still end up pregnant. I just want to relax and stop worrying about this . Thank you so much.
Member # 17924
posted 08-13-2009 09:19 AM
For future reference, please keep all your questions relating to one topic in the same thread. Horizon gave you some excellent advice in your other thread. You cannot be pregnant and have a period, so regardless of the time frame between the risk and your period, if you get it, pregnancy did not and cannot occur. Clarice, after going through your post history, you have over 5 posts relating to possible pregnancy or worries about pregnancy. I understand how scary it can be to think you are pregnant when that's the last thing you want, however, we cannot continue to tell you are not pregnant and have you continue to come back questioning that advice or with more possible scenarios. When you joined the boards, you agreed to follow our guidelines, which included a clause about our 3 strikes rule when it comes to pregnancy worries: Directly from our guidelines: quote: We may no longer answer a given user's questions on a given topic if: * that user has already been answered, in depth by one or more staff and volunteers, but continues to ask the same question, * We know that user to be a fraud or a user is identified as a previously banned user * and/or if a user has had more than THREE pregnancy scares and/or STI scares we have addressed but continues to take risks which present those scenarios after we have advised them at least three times as to how to make safer choices Do you have any diagnosed anxiety disorders? Or are you just finding that you tend to stress about pregnancy more than anything else? We have a good thread here about needlessly worrying about pregnancy that I will link to you. I need you to understand where we are coming from in this regard, and that we've been more than willing to help you with your questions. You are more than welcome to continue to ask questions not relating to pregnancy and to use the boards as you wish. If you have any questions about the guidelines or about what I'm saying here, feel free to ask.
Here is the link to our Support Group's thread on pregnancy worrying: http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/ultimatebb.php?/ubb/get_topic/f/9/t/001131.html [ 08-13-2009, 09:34 AM: Message edited by: JamsessionVT ]
Member # 43246
posted 08-13-2009 11:39 AM
I apologize, JamsessionVT, for not abiding by the guidelines. I certainly did not intend to. I did not see about the three-strike rule, and for that, I apologize. Thank you for answering my question and for being supportive.
To answer your question, I honestly have a very big fear of pregnancy, and I appreciate the link to the thread you gave me. This seems to get worse with time because I keep noticing all of my friends falling pregnant and ending up in bad situations because of that. I really do not want to become someone in that type of situation because I have a great future ahead of me. I am not saying having a baby is a bad thing, but I feel someone in my shoes at the given moment has no business having one. I would hate myself for either 1. not being able to properly take care of a child, or 2. dumping that responsibility on my parents. I feel like even birth control (when I do start taking my sexual activity further) wouldn't eliminate my worries because it is not 100%. I am someone who always needs something that is absolutely definite or guaranteed in order to feel safe. Yet, at the same time, I want to realize the odds are against that happening and just enjoy the intimacy. I really hate to go on and on in this thread, especially after breaking the guidelines, but I just want to mention that I believe I may also have OCD. While I would be worried about pregnancy regardless, I probably would not be to this extent if I was mentally healthy right now. A few summers ago, my parents went through a bad divorce (they are back together again, but they kept divorcing, getting back together, divorcing, getting back together). Off and on. They were constantly fighting, getting me involved in the fighting, ect. My dad took his anger out on me a lot. I actually suffered from panic attacks during that time. I never want to ever go through a panic attack again. I felt like I was dying. Anyway, since then, I noticed my mental health go completely down the drain. I started having disturbing, repetitive thoughts (I really do not wish to discuss the thoughts). I never tell anyone about this out of fear of sounding disturbed. The thoughts always, of course, bother me. I find I don't have compulsions, really. I just have these thoughts. I learned this is called "pure O" (IRONICALLY, I am going to school as a psychology major!). These thoughts seem to increase in intensity and frequency when I am stressed out and decline when I am relaxed, happy, or keeping busy. I then started to obsess over this whole pregnancy thing. I really can't say for sure, as I am obviously not a doctor, but I do suspect. I really do not want anyone worrying about me, so I never tell my parents, my friends, or my boyfriend this. I also am very much against medicine and would like to avoid being put on it at all costs. I know I should probably tell someone, and again, the ironic thing is that I always advise people I love to get help with their problems. I just can't bring myself to listen to my own advice. Anyway, thanks again for all the answers to my questions, and I promise to leave you all alone with this now.
Member # 17924
posted 08-13-2009 12:12 PM
Clarice, I do want you to know that we DO want to be as supportive as you as we can. Obviously that means providing you with as many resources as we are able to. I appreciate you being honest with us; know that we don't make black marks against people for things like this. We enforce these rules in the interest of being fair to all other users, as well as because we have to recognize where limitations are when it comes to helping one particular user. If we see that someone is not being helped by our answers, it tends to be in our best interest (and there's as well, as no one really benefits from being told the same thing over and over if they don't accept that advice) to ask them to seek help elsewhere. We are happy to help you find any resources we can provide you, but we must insist that you do what's right for you, and treat your anxiety at the source, which in this case is not by continually telling you you aren't pregnant. Does that make sense?
I do encourage you to spend some time in the thread I linked you to. I don't want to toot my own horn, as I started that thread, but I think it may be beneficial for you to read others commentary on their situations, which are similar to yours. As an aside, do you think it'd be a good idea for you to take a timeout from sexual activity right now, until you can get your anxiety issues worked out?