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Message: HTML is not enabled. UBB Code™ is enabled.	[QUOTE]Originally posted by Aemilie: [QB] Kiiinda long story ahead: ¡Hola, Scarleteen! Will you accept a 27-year old? I love the discussions on gender that are happening here. As for me, I was assigned female at birth. I'm asexual and have been out to most people for about 6 years. I also identify as genderqueer, have been considering the identity for years, but haven't really told anyone. Probably because I'm constantly questioning it myself. Like, so constantly that it's probably moved into the intrusive-thought category. I'm always wondering if I'm "making it all up", feeling guilty or shameful about my gender identification, like a fraud, like I "should know this by now", like it's pointless to even think about, etc. Maybe these kind of repetitive thoughts come from my depression and anxiety. I'm trying to accept it as that, and just marinate with my confusion for awhile without letting it freak me out. It isn't easy, though. I'd like to find a therapist who's conversant in these issues, but I haven't had luck with it in the past. I want to be able to talk to people about this stuff, but I don't have any other genderqueer people in my life (at least, not knowingly). I can talk pretty openly with most friends and family about my sexuality, but I don't feel comfortable talking with them about my gender yet. I also worry that other genderqueer or non-binary people wouldn't accept me, since I don't think I "look" genderqueer, whatever that means. (Yeah, I'm aware on an intellectual level that there's no way to "look genderqueer", but I worry about other people's judgments.) I'm always read as female, no matter what I do to my appearance, and I've never been harassed specifically about my gender (although failure to conform to gender roles may have been a factor in some bullying incidents of the past). It's hard for me to describe my gender identity exactly. I've never had much of an inherent sense of gender and I don't understand what makes something "masculine" or "feminine". I don't like that people put me into a gender box when I want them to see me as a person first. In an ideal world, I'd be able to switch back and forth between being male and female. So I'm more of an androgyne than genderless. My inner vision of myself doesn't match my outer self, which is frustrating at times. Although it's hard to know if it's really my inner self, or just one persona. Over the years I've done so much reading about gender, but expanding my conception of gender has just confused me more. Maybe that's not such a bad thing, and I feel like it'll work out in time...but I'd still like to talk to some like-minded people who can relate to this stuff. [/QB][/QUOTE]

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