T O P I C R E V I E W
SmileyGuy1974
Member # 31422
posted 11-10-2006 03:46 PM
I have read both of these books cover to cover and refer back to them quite often. The Joy of Sex is written by Dr. Alex Comfort. The book is easy to follow, though the good doctor does write some passages you have to read twice to understand. All-in-all though, the chapters are grouped together nicely and are really informative. This book was written for those people who want a deeper and more thorough understanding of sexuality and sex. Those who are just starting out in their exploration of the world of sex should read a few introductory works on the basics of sex first. Otherwise, you may experience sensory overload because this book holds nothing back! The Joy of Solo Sex is written by Dr. Harold Litten. This book is an excellent read and is the most straight-forward and down-to-earth book on solo-sex you could buy. The book takes the stigma out of masturbation and shows masturbation as what it really is...an enjoyable, exciting, imaginative and completely safe activity that should be cherished by everyone. It is my belief that both of the "JOY" books should be an integral part of everyone's sexual library.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 11-10-2006 03:54 PM
(Just a note on these? I agree, they have some awesome stuff. But they're not for everyone. Even with some teeny inclusions, the first is really only for heterosexuals. So, for everyone straight, maybe, but the rest of us get pretty left out in the cold. )
SmileyGuy1974
Member # 31422
posted 11-10-2006 07:15 PM
I flipped through my copy of "The Joy of Sex" to see how inclusive it is. I can certainly see how one could think it's geared toward heterosexuality. For instance, all of the sketches are of a woman and a man. However, I think anyone, gay or straight, can utilize the facts and suggestions in this book. For example, any of the sections concerning techniques on how to stimulate a woman could be very insightful to many gay women. And, many of the sections about male stimulation, like good handwork, mouthwork and visualization could be just as insightful to many gay men. I'm a big fan of this book, and I believe it can be useful to anyone of any sexual persuasion. Let me put it this way. A straight man and a gay woman can both read this book and become better lovers for their respective female partners. A gay man and a straight woman can both read this book and become better lovers for their respective male partners. Entire sections are dedicated to topics such as lubrication, pubic hair, kissing, manual stimulation, mouth music, gadgets and gimmicks; just to name a few. There is nothing overtly heterosexual or homosexual about any of these topics. Gaining additional knowledge about these topics will serve the reader well no matter what his or her sexual preference. Educating people in the language of love is the goal of this book, and I think it can be accomplished by everyone, without exception. "The Joy of Sex" gets people thinking about sex as a 7 course meal instead of just an appetizer. And we all need to eat. Heather, your insight and knowledge is so refreshing. I'm new to the site and have quickly come to know you, not only as the founder, but as someone with great things to say. I thank you, and look forward to more discussion in the future.
Heather
Member # 3
posted 11-10-2006 07:20 PM
The thing is? For those of us who are queer, it's really isolating to have no representation of ourselves (per usual) and sometimes, things are more heterosexist from our perspectives than people who aren't queer might notice, especially in some cases, it's not just a matter of switching up what straight folks do. To some degree, books like that for us queers are like a native English speaker reading a book in Spanish: even if we have it as a secondary language, it's not the same as it is in our native language, and not as useful. Again, not in disagreement that those books aren't of value: I think they totally are. But for those of us who aren't het -- even just speaking for myself? Eh. That value is in many ways limited, and we're better served by books we don't have to translate into our own lingo, if you get me. And hey: welcome!
SmileyGuy1974
Member # 31422
posted 11-10-2006 07:48 PM
Yet again, you have opened my mind to a new & different perspective. Thank You. I do have a question now. I'm always looking to increase my sexual knowledge, and I do have friends come to me for advice. The thing is, when they ask me about books and educational sources, I refer them to things that I have utilized in my own quest for sexual understanding. So, my question is this: What literary sources do I suggest if someone came to me for advice who is homosexual? I've looked at Barnes & Noble and find mostly books about people's experiences and journeys as gay men and women. They're autobiographical and biographical works that shed a lot of light and instill a lot of confidence in the reader, but there's nothing in there about "sex" per se. Any suggestions? [ 11-17-2006, 10:44 AM: Message edited by: SmileyGuy1974 ]
Heather
Member # 3
posted 11-10-2006 08:13 PM
The Good Vibrations Guide to Sex is totally inclusive and completely fantastic. Your queer friends will likely also find that finding queer-specific sexuality guides tends to be a lot easier via websites like Babeland and Good Vibrations rather than mainstream bookstores, because homophobia is unfortunately an issue with many distributors. (And I'm not just saying the GV Guide rocks because the two women who wrote it have been incredible mentors for me from day one. It's my personal favorite, regardless, and a big crowd-pleaser.)
SmileyGuy1974
Member # 31422
posted 11-10-2006 08:39 PM
Good Vibrations...how could I have forgotten?! Thanks for the information and websites:)