T O P I C R E V I E W
Gabc
Member # 46613
posted 04-10-2010 06:08 PM
I'm 17 years old and I'm a girl.I think I'm Bisexual.I always liked guys and had had boyfriends before but lately this past year ever since this girl told me she was a lesbian I started to like her and its not just her I also find myself attracted to other girls. I also fantasizes about them.I really like this girl and i know that because every time i see her I smile or i get excited to see her.When I go out with my friends they are always checking out guys and I do too but then i find myself looking at girls.But I know that I like guys but I think I'm mostly attracted to girls. I have watch some lesbian movies and i really like them i have also look at lesbian pron and it turns me on. I'm not sure that I'm bi but I know that I'm not straight but I also say that I don't believe in labels. I really don't know what to do because I can't tell anyone because I'm scared. My family is really against gays and some of my friends are homophobic.But when I see a lesbian couple i just stare because i say to myself, that must be great being who you are and not caring about what people say.
Ecofem
Member # 13388
posted 04-10-2010 08:54 PM
Hi Gabc, welcome to Scarleteen! It sounds like you may well be bisexual but it's really something for you to decide, and we totally support not choosing labels. We have a lot of links for you to read, so I recommend checking those out first:The Bees and...the Bees: A Homosexuality and Bisexuality Primer Bi the Dozen: A Bisexuality Quiz Living without Labels http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/im_bisexual_so_why_dont_i_feel_exactly_the_same_about_men_and_women http://www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/she_came_out_and_now_im_questioning_myself http://www.scarleteen.com/article/gaydar/misconception_mayhem_separating_bisexuality_and_homosexuality_myths_from_facts I'm sorry your family isn't more supportive: perhaps with time they would be, but perhaps they wouldn't. That's hard but it's really OK in that we and so many people out there do believe and support you. It would help to find friends who are more tolerant/accepting, too, because while you can't choose family, you can choose friends, and you want ones who are accepting and loving! I would argue that those lesbian couples probably do care how others see them in certain ways but are strong in other ways. I think it'd be really good to spend some time in a LGBT-friendly environment. For example, PFLAG is a great organization to check out. Here is a list of PFLAG locations in CA: http://www.pflag.org/map/index.php?state=CA (There are numerous chapters in LA and the surrounding areas.) Do you think you could attend a meeting? Would you be interested in it?
TheTasteOfPurple
Member # 43186
posted 04-10-2010 09:18 PM
It's great that you are so open-minded about gay and bisexual people despite growing up in a homophobic environment. Seems like most of your attitudes about homosexuality are right-on. Remember that identifying as "questioning" is always a choice, and one that's just as valid as identifying as bi or lesbian. And of course, so is not labeling yourself at all! There's a great article on this site called Living Without Labels . If you have friends who you know won't be judgmental about your sexuality or try to convince you that you're somebody you're not (and who won't talk about it without your express permission) I'd suggest talking to them about it. Getting things out there, even if not to everyone, usually helps with getting them figured out. I bet there are oodles of LGBT-friendly groups in LA, and probably some that you can get to from where you are. It can be intimidating to go if you don't know anybody, but it's definitely worth it.
Gabc
Member # 46613
posted 04-10-2010 11:16 PM
Thanks Those articles help I would love to attend a meeting I want to be happy with who I am and i want my parents to accept me no matter what
Ecofem
Member # 13388
posted 04-10-2010 11:21 PM
I'm glad those articles help! I hope you can attend a meeting soon then. I think you will be happy with who you are but sometimes that can take time. I can't guarantee how your parents will feel but I'm certainly hopeful that they'll be understanding and supportive but, as I said before, I can't say for sure. We'll see... is there anything else we can help you with for now, Gabc?
Gabc
Member # 46613
posted 04-10-2010 11:31 PM
Thank you For now that's all Ecofem thank you and if i read right I'll be attending a meeting on April 21