T O P I C R E V I E W
blush
Member # 69019
posted 07-10-2011 02:44 AM
I wanted to know something? Let me make this as small as possible: I've been wanting to cross dress for years. At first I thought it was just a silly phase I had because I wanted to be different and "unique" but as I grew older and matured more I began to realize that this urge to cross dress wasn't going away and wasn't connected to anything outside (media, friends, etc) and it wasn't sexual. I really wanted to and still do for myself. I'm not exactly sure why it makes me feel better but I really do want to. The only problems I have is: How do I tell my family I feel like doing this? Is it even really possible for a female to crossdress (I've been told it really isn't because women can wear any types of clothing) so would it just be looked at as "normal"? And most importantly WHERE can I get male clothes that fit me? I'm pretty small (as in 5'2, 115 pounds) and I know most guys are over 5'8 and weigh more. Their clothing has also gotten really loose because of the trend...what should I do? Search in the boys section instead of the teens or something? I'm a bit confused ^^;
Jill2000Plus
Member # 41657
posted 07-10-2011 07:13 AM
While in some countries (and possibly more in the west than elsewhere from what I have seen, but I am no expert so if anyone knows different then please correct me), it's more accepted for women to wear "men's" clothes than for men to wear "women's" clothes, there is still a pretty big taboo against women having a noticeable moustache or beard in many of those countries (sideburns are also often somewhat frowned upon, I think), I tend to dress in clothes that are stereotypically more associated with men (trousers - mostly jeans, t-shirts that are cut in a unisex style that does not emphasize curves and are plain or have pictures/designs that are not of something that would be considered "girly", jumpers, flat soled shoes that are often from the men's department), though I do have long hair, and I sometimes think it would be fun to wear a moustache and beard, the thing is I've been partly dressing this way because I consider myself to be agender for years and people probably don't even notice, and if I wore a beard and/or moustache they'd probably either think I was doing it for a laugh or that I was a trans man, the point I'm making is that I see how frustrating it is to not be able to show your gender identity or lack thereof in your clothing in a way that won't be misinterpreted, but all I really can think of is "masculine" facial hair, which isn't the same as clothes so may or may not be what you're looking for? I think the important thing to remember is that regardless of society's view on it, if you feel that what you're doing is crossdressing and that is something that feels right to you that's what's important, even if other people don't realise that's what you're doing, gender expression should be about how you feel most comfortable, not about conforming to someone else's idea of what makes someone a man/woman/butch/femme/masculine/feminine/boy/girl/dude/dudette/broad (I put that one in there for you Heather!)/ladyboy/bro/dyke/genderqueer/agender/macho macho man/lumberjack/chump/chumpette/daffodil... ok and now I have run out of words for gender identities, that was not meant to be an exhaustive list, that's just what I could think of at the time.
blush
Member # 69019
posted 07-13-2011 12:17 PM
quote: Originally posted by Jill2000Plus: While in some countries (and possibly more in the west than elsewhere from what I have seen, but I am no expert so if anyone knows different then please correct me), it's more accepted for women to wear "men's" clothes than for men to wear "women's" clothes, there is still a pretty big taboo against women having a noticeable moustache or beard in many of those countries (sideburns are also often somewhat frowned upon, I think), I tend to dress in clothes that are stereotypically more associated with men (trousers - mostly jeans, t-shirts that are cut in a unisex style that does not emphasize curves and are plain or have pictures/designs that are not of something that would be considered "girly", jumpers, flat soled shoes that are often from the men's department), though I do have long hair, and I sometimes think it would be fun to wear a moustache and beard, the thing is I've been partly dressing this way because I consider myself to be agender for years and people probably don't even notice, and if I wore a beard and/or moustache they'd probably either think I was doing it for a laugh or that I was a trans man, the point I'm making is that I see how frustrating it is to not be able to show your gender identity or lack thereof in your clothing in a way that won't be misinterpreted, but all I really can think of is "masculine" facial hair, which isn't the same as clothes so may or may not be what you're looking for? I think the important thing to remember is that regardless of society's view on it, if you feel that what you're doing is crossdressing and that is something that feels right to you that's what's important, even if other people don't realise that's what you're doing, gender expression should be about how you feel most comfortable, not about conforming to someone else's idea of what makes someone a man/woman/butch/femme/masculine/feminine/boy/girl/dude/dudette/broad (I put that one in there for you Heather!)/ladyboy/bro/dyke/genderqueer/agender/macho macho man/lumberjack/chump/chumpette/daffodil... ok and now I have run out of words for gender identities, that was not meant to be an exhaustive list, that's just what I could think of at the time. This helped, thanks.
patrickvienna
Member # 29269
posted 07-14-2011 10:30 AM
Hi blush! When you say you're wondering how to tell your family this is something you want to do, how accepting do you think they're likely to be of your choices with your gender presentation? Too, how important for you is telling them - for example, do you live with your family, or is it possible for you to dress like this without them knowing, if you feel that's what you want? It occurred to me that one way in which you can present as more masculine is in styling your hair, by the way, or by making choices you feel are more masculine with regard to body hair. Men of 5'2" and shorter certainly exist, but I'm afraid I don't have any experience of trying to find men's clothing at those sizes. I found this link that might be useful:http://www.ftmguide.org/shortmensclothes.html Too, if you're handy with a sewing machine, tailoring clothes to fit the way you want them to can be a great idea.