T O P I C R E V I E W
Member # 653
posted 03-27-2002 04:12 PM
For the moms and dads out there raising small children, what normally happens during a day with your child? Take us through what happens from morning until bedtime, no matter how insignificant you may think the things you do are. Tell us how old your child is, and what other things you have on your plate right now. This will hopefully give others some perspective on just what being a parent is all about.
I'll post mine soon.
Member # 7638
posted 04-09-2002 12:51 PM
well i dot have a typical day. but there are som things that doesnt chang much. i wake up my kids wake up, i mke breakfast they throw it everwhere, the watch tv and play, then i make lunch and they throw that everywhere, then i clean for hours. they play we go to the park on nice days. they see their dad and then i make dinner. and then the play for awhile with me and with each other the take a bath and then they g to bed. but there is more to it than that. lik the messes they mak and the fits they take and the frustration you get of being with them without a break. but then there are the times they kiss you and hug you and tell you that they love you.
Member # 7343
posted 04-09-2002 02:09 PM
Well, I had a nice little list of my day, and well, I think my son ate it! (yes it eats paper, and whatever else will fit inside his mouth!) My son is 8 months old, here is a sample of our day.
Okay this is my yesterday (typical):
8:30-Jason(my boyfriend) rises with Stephen (my son), plays with him, change him gives him his breakfast. 9:30 I get up, take over so Jason can do homework, we play, watch cartoons, Jason leaves for school 10:00- start getting Stephen ready for so we can go out and do some banking, get him dressed, ect... 10:30 catch the bus, do banking some running around 11:30- come home, feed Stephen lunch 12:00- I eat lunch, while he plays quietly in his high chair 12:30-Stephen goes down for a nap, I do laundry, dishes (the only chance I get to do dishes), boil bottles. If I don't do laundry, then I sweep and wash the floors or cleaning the kitchen or bathroom. Send some emails. I also shower during this time. 2:30-wake Stephen up so I can go to class. Get him ready to go to my mom's 3:00- my mom picks him up, I leave for school (while at my moms, Stephen will finish his nap,and play some more) 6:00- Get home from school, call mom to bring him home, start dinner 6:30-Stephen gets home, he plays in his crib or on the floor in the kitchen with me while I finish dinner (my mother feeds him dinner at her place when she has him, otherwise, he would get dinner before I started our dinner) 7:00 Jason gets home, we eat, clean up, the 3 or us relax for a bit 8:00 Jason takes Stephen and I do some school work or catch up on emails, or chat with a friend on the phone 9:00 Bath time for Stephen 9:30 Stephen gets 2 bottles, then we cuddle, and watch some tv until he falls asleep 10:30ish Stephen goes to bed, I finish up my school work 12:30am we got to bed
Most of the time Stephen will sleep right through the night, but there are nights when he wakes up.
Hope this helps to shed some light on schedules, and childcare.
Member # 7343
posted 06-16-2003 07:51 PM
Reading my last post made me realize how much my life has changed since then. My son is nearly 2 now.
He gets up at 7:00ish. Depending on whether I have an early class I either feed him breakfast or get him ready for daycare (the daycare will feed him breakfast if he is there before 8:30. Then it is the struggle to get out the door. In the winter this was particularly nuts. So many parents have said they loved winter until they had kids, and man do I ever agree. Winter was nuts, with all the snowsuits, and boots (and kicking off the boots, so you put them on again about a dozen times). But alas it is summer, and I no longer spend 30 minutes (and I am not exageratting, I timed it once) to get him ready to go out. Now, since I get him dressed when he wakes up, I pop on his shoes and we go out in the stroller. About 45 minutes later, we are walking through the daycare doors. Course that has meant struggling with a stroller on the bus, fighting with ignorant bus drivers, and a screaming kid who wants to touch everything and everybody in sight. I cannot tell you how embarrassing it is to have your child touch other people's butts cause they are right beside them!
Then I go to school and do a long day of school things. At the end of the day, I am totally drained, so I go pick up my son from daycare. Then it is home again on the bus.
Once I am home, we play for a bit and then it is time to start dinner. By the time dinner is made and my son is fed it is nearly 7:00, we play until 7:30 and then it is bath time. He has a bath, we play in the bath, read a few stories then it is bed time. So, it is 9pm now, and my son is finally asleep. Time to send emails and do school work. The partner gets home around 8:30. he has to work 2 jobs to keep us a float. And yet some how no day is the same. When I see this all written out it looks so exhausting. I guess I just go into autopilot. And wake up the next morning and start again, waiting for the weekend.
Life can get crazy with a kid. And I must admit I have lost my cool on more then one occassion, as well as, cried myself to sleep. But you do what you got to do to survive.
Member # 5578
posted 06-16-2003 08:56 PM
Wow, Insane. That was...really interesting. You have a
really busy day. Thanks for sharing! I enjoyed reading that. How old are you guys?
Member # 12477
posted 06-16-2003 10:56 PM
I have 2 children one is 8 and the other is 2 weeks old.
My day. Well the day starts at midnight right. I feed the baby and 12:00 and we go to sleep. The baby wakes up at around 2 I change her diaper feed her and we go back to sleep. The baby wakes up at 4 I feed her change her diaper and we go back to sleep. The baby wakes up at 6 ish and I feed her change her diaper and we get dressed. My 8 year old gets up around 7 and I fix her breakfast. I check out what she is wearing and make sure it is appropriate for school if it is a school day. I make her lunch or give her lunch money and driver her to school at 9. Right after I feed the baby. We get in the car and I double-check we have all the school supplies for the day. I drop her off at school and run a couple of errands. On the way back home I turn the radio up all the way so the babies crying doesn't drive me insane. We get home around 11 and I feed and change the baby. Around this time I realize I haven't eaten anything yet. I go into the kitchen to make breakfast/lunch and realize there is not a clean dish in the house so I do the dishes and clean up the kitchen. While juggling a fussy baby on my hip the whole time. I make a bowl of soup for lunch. When I take it out of the microwave I drop it on the floor and begin to cry. I clean p the spiled soup and eat saltines out of the box. I sit down to "rest just a sec" and wake up 30 mn later when the baby needs to be changed and fed. 3:30 and I have to go pick up my 8 year old. If it is Tuesday or Thursday I drive her to gymnastics. Then the baby and I nap under a tree until 6 when my 8 yr old gets out of gymnastics. Drive home with a screaming baby in the car. Once home I try to start dinner but the baby needs to be fed so I feed her and start dinner except someone put the milk container back in the fridge when it was empty so what I have started I don’t have all the ingreadance for. I use water and some creamer to make do and dinner is ready at 8. But for some reason the baby wants to eat again even though it has only been 1/2 an hour and by the time I eat diner is cold. I make sure my 8 yr old has done any homework she has and try to make her practice dance. Its 9 pm and bed time but the baby needs to be fed and the 8 yr old just remembered she is required to bring 3 toilet roll holders to school tomorrow. So I am sitting on the bathroom floor unrolling toilet paper while trying to feed the baby. By 10 I have the rolls and a sleeping baby so I take a quick bath and go to bed by 11:00. And that is an average day.
Member # 7343
posted 06-18-2003 09:58 PM
AC that sounds so familiar. I have days were I threaten to sell my son to gypsies. And those are usually good days! lol! Hang in there!
Member # 12433
posted 07-11-2003 09:21 PM
My son is almost 6 months. We usually wake up around 9 or 10 and lay in bed, me sleeping and him nursing, for about an hour. (we cosleep, so I never have to get out of bed
) We get up and I change his diaper and get him dressed. He poops once a day, usually in the morning, so this is the stinky one. Every other day I throw a load of diapers in the washer at this time. I throw a onesie on him, and occasionally eat breakfast but not very often. We play for about a half hour and then he wants to nurse again. I go downstairs and say hi to my partner (Julian's dad) and check my email while I'm breastfeeding. Then I call somebody and make plans to hang out, and put Jules in the car and drive to meet them, or put him in the sling and walk if it's not too far. I go out to lunch if I can afford it (theres yummy hummus for $3.50 at the cafe down the street). Julian likes to nurse every hour or two unless he's really busy. He just learned how to sit so when we go out he can sit in high chairs or on the floor, but he is held most of the time. yesterday we went to visit my friend Craig's record store, then out to lunch with my friend Nick, then Nick came over to my house and we hung out and played with the baby. Today we went to a meeting for the local Abortion Fund and to the pool with my friend Katie and had a great time (it was Julian's first pool adventure). We go home usually around 5 or 6, and Julian takes his nap then (sometimes I join him). I do dishes and put diapers in the dryer. I straighten our apartment up a little bit and when Nathan (my partner) gets home we decide what to do that night. Usually we go out to eat or to the local brewery, sometimes we have people over for dinner or go to friend's houses. We are usually home by 11, and I nurse the baby to sleep, take a bath, have sex, eat a late snack, read a book, or none or some of the above. Then I crawl in bed with my son and snuggle up and go to sleep. He wakes up around 4 and 7 but I just stick my boob in his mouth and continue snoozing. I am going back to college in August and Nathan will be watching the baby while I am in classes. Forunately we only live 5 blocks from the University so I won't have a long commute, and Nathan only works 3 days a week and can take Julian to work with him. I'm sure my schedule will be way different then, and I'll finally have to resort to breastpumping (yuck). Also Julian is almost old enough to start solids, so that'll be an extra mess to clean up every day (but an exciting milestone nonetheless). Oh yeah and I change diapers every 2-3 hours throughout the day (but not at night).
Mandy Julian's rockin mama!
Member # 568
posted 05-21-2004 05:00 PM
This is worth a bump with some updating. Mamas out there, can you fill us all in on how your lives are going?
Q ... E ... D ... bee-yatch!
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Member # 653
posted 05-21-2004 07:36 PM
My son will be four in August. Already. Where the hell did the time go? I joined these boards when I was pregnant!
So I feel I should provide a little backstory before I detail my day. Here's what I heard when I got pregnant: "I'll support you." "We'll raise him together." "I'll always be your friend, no matter what." "Just call me if you need help with the baby." Then my relationship with the biological father dissolved -- I haven't gotten a cent of support from him, and he hasn't even called or written to see how his offspring is doing; he doesn't even seem to care whether Evan is alive. All I've heard from him is how evil I am. Whatever.
So I'm living with my fiance, who I started dating soon after I found out I was pregnant -- I think we figured I was about twelve weeks along -- but all parenting costs come out of my own pocket -- he pays rent and utilities, I pay for food and Evan's needs. It works for us.
I work at least 45 hours per week, seven to three on weekdays, and six to two on weekends. I'd prepared myself emotionally and financially for a normal child who'd have a normal childhood, but fate had different plans; Evan is a special-needs child. He has receptive and expressive language impairment, is being screened on and off for autism, and goes to the geneticist once a year because he shows signs of Neurofibromatosis, which showed up out of nowhere, and Marfan Syndrome, which his biological father had. He goes to speech therapy once a week, and did not say much prior to his third birthday. He did not pottytrain until just last month. He cannot handle changes to his schedule or surroundings, and things around here MUST follow a rigid pattern.
So here's the pattern.
WEEKDAYS, except for Wednesday
5 AM, Evan wakes up and climbs into bed with Jeremy and myself. I ask him if he has to use the potty, and have to physically put him there myself, or he'll wet the bed. 6 AM, Jeremy gets out of the shower and puts out Evan's breakfast while I take a super-quick shower. Some mornings, I just have time to wash my hair. Most mornings, I have to skip it and hope I get home from work before Evan gets home from daycare, so I can have five minutes alone in which to bathe. Evan eats and is dressed by 6:30, but this can be as late as seven if we can't find the right shoes, or he can feel the tag on his shirt, or his jeans are too stiff, or a number of other sensory-overload problems he seems to have in the morning. There is no rushing out the door. There is no sleeping in. My shift starts at seven. I drop Evan off at the daycare, and I can hear him screaming from the parking lot as Jeremy and I leave. It might be because the hamster cage in the classroom is out of place. It might be because he has a substitute teacher. It might be because he misses me. I never know, and I can never go back to see why my child is so upset, because I really need my job.
If I get home from work before Evan and Jeremy come home, I vacuum the floor (Evan is TERRIFIED of it) or take a bleedin shower. Or just sit alone and read a book, or play a video game, because I never have time to do these things anymore.
As soon as Evan gets home, he sorts his toys and puts them away. I make dinner at five, we eat at six, he has a bath at seven, and we start his bedtime routine. First, we read two books. Next, we watch his Little People video. We read one more book. We cuddle and count his toes, and he points out the parts of my face. We put in a CD, and he dances on my bed until the clock reads EXACTLY 9. He goes into his bed, I tuck him in with his red quilt and three stuffed animals, and turn his light off and shut the door. After that, I do laundry, dishes, clean house, etcetera until midnight. I'm usually able to pop online while he's in the bath because he doesn't like me to sit with him, only Jeremy's allowed to that, and after he's asleep. And sometimes when he really wants to play alone. If I want to go out with my friends, I have to wait until he's asleep. I have to make sure I have someone watching him. If I'm lucky, I'll be able to go out once a month. Usually, though, it's once every three or four months. It's hard to keep friends you rarely see.
On Wednesdays, Evan crawls into bed with me early in the morning, uses the potty, and we go back to bed and watch childrens cartoons until about eight. We eat breakfast, shower together -- remember, I cannot leave him alone -- and have to be ready to leave the house by ten. He has speech therapy at ten fifteen, which is 45 of the longest minutes of my life every single week. He hates it, he resents it, and it's effing expensive. By the end of his session he's usually so emotionally drained that all he wants to do is lay against my shoulder. I drop him off at school, and do the weekly grocery shopping. He gets home when Jeremy gets home, and our night is the same as it is for the rest of the week.
Weekends are the worst. I have to work at six in the morning. We wake up at four. Remember, I don't get to go to bed until midnight. I haven't had a full night's sleep since this child was born. Imagine going four years with only five hours of sleep on your best nights, zero sleep for three or four days on your worst. He spends the day with Jeremy, and clings to my legs as soon as I get home. We can't go out shopping or to the park or for a walk, because he has issues with strangers and crowds.
It's impossible to sit here and say this is exactly what happens in a typical day, because with a child, especially with a special-needs child, there are no typical days. And it's easy to sit here and say "Oh, it won't be this bad for me", but truth be told, you're not immune. I had a normal pregnancy, followed all the doctor's orders and read all the books and did everything I was supposed to do. He's not a stupid child, he has an exceptionally high IQ. He's just wired a little different from the rest of us. And it's hard. It's the hardest thing I've ever done. I am not ashamed to admit that there have been times where I stop and survey my surroundings, and wonder what the hell happened to get me here. And what happened to the life I'd planned for myself. And what I'd be doing if I hadn't had a baby. These are the absolute worst, most painful feelings I've ever had. I love my son deeply and fiercely, but this wasn't what I'd planned. I didn't think that I'd have to lay awake at night in a panic because I might not have enough money to keep food in the house. Or that being able to bathe or sleep or eat an entire meal on a regular basis would become a fantasy. And the kicker? Things are much easier now than they were when he was a baby. He was a good baby, but I was very poorly equipped to emotionally handle motherhood.
It's rewarding, don't get me wrong. But that doesn't make it simple.
Member # 7638
posted 05-21-2004 07:51 PM
well since i posted that alot has changed. i had another baby who is 3 months old now so my day is crazy. i get up at 5am to get my husband up for work and then make breakfast, at 7 my kids get up, i get the girls ready and my son so i can walk him to school, (transmission is out of hubbys car so he takes mine). i walk to school and have to keep telling my 4 year old to stay by me and stop running off and we eventually drop him off and come home but it is a fight doing it.
when we get back home i have to keep getting my daughter something to drink because she drinks alot, and give the baby a bath, and play with both of them. i do the dishes, do the laundry, clean the house, make lunch, all while taking care of the baby. at 2:30 i get the girls ready and walk back up to the school to pick up my son, telling my daughter to stop running off all the way there and back. we get home i give them a snack, then i start getting dinner ready around 5. after we have dinner and i get the kitchen halfway clean saving the dishes for morning the kids clean their room then i give my son a bath and my daughter a bath, they sit and watch tv for a little while then they go to bed at 9:30. but the baby isnt asleep yet. and while i do everything else i still have to stop to feed her, change her, and play with her. she goes to bed around 11. then my husband takes a shower and then if im not too tired after chasing kids all day i take a shower. then around 1am i am off to bed. some days there are added things in there such as doctors and other things i have to do all while having the kids with me. im stressed out most of the time but i am also very happy at the same time, because i love my kids and love being with them and im glad i dont have to work right now (although i might have to get a job soon). kids are expensive. and it really sucks taking three kids to the store when you go grocery shopping even when my husband goes with me. we dont get any alone time together we dont do anything together, we hardly even talk anymore. i have no typical day just certain things i do everyday but there are twists to everything daily. its not all fun and games but there is not much i would change about my life.
well there is my update, i hope all of you that are thinking about having kids when you are 14 and 15 (i was 14 when i got pregnant the first time) reconsider it after reading this whole section. there is alot of things that happen that you will never think of. (like once when i was at work a few years ago the babysitter was in the bathroom for like 2 minutes and my son climbed up on a 6 foot high shelf and got a sharp object and cut my daughters finger off all the way through the bone).
Member # 18520
posted 06-13-2004 05:14 PM
Hey, my boyfriend and I got pregnant in December. I'm 17 and had to do the whole, breakin' it to the parents. I'm due in about two months - August 18th.
I'm moving to Germany in September (dad got orders), and my boyfriend is staying in Florida for basic training for the Navy (which he leaves for in one month)... Our timing sucks doubly bad... I'm basicly going to be a single mom while I finish school, with the help of my parents... Any words of good faith? I'm a generally responsible person (minus one obvious "mistake"), everything will be okay. Right? You kinda scared me with your account.
Member # 7638
posted 06-13-2004 07:35 PM
everything will be ok. you have the support of your parents so thats a good thing. once you get into the routine it will be really weird and hard to change it. you will have to get used to doing things on your own and with your child but im sure you are like the rest of us and wouldnt have it any other way. it will be alright im sure.