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Author Topic: alone and afraid
sweetbubblez
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Member # 44333

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So I've been through a lot and I'm working on getting past that. The better I get the more I feel lonely. I have serious trust issues but at the same time I want to be open enough to create friendships. I really want a relationship but I seem to seek out the wrong type of guys (they only want sex) and I've been told it's not a good idea to be in a relationship at this time but I want that presence of closeness and security with someone. What should I do???

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{*sweetbubblelipz*}

Posts: 71 | From: cincy, US | Registered: Oct 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
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What about with your friends and family. If it's not a good idea to be romantically close with someone right now there's still a LOT of other ways to be close to people. My group of friends is VERY close and very supportive, whether just curling up in a group to watch movies or being there to talk someone through a tough time. Family can be the same way, or even if allowed a pet?

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3415 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
sweetbubblez
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I really don't have any good friends, that's something I'm trying to work on... making some. As for family, well that's a different story. On the other hand what I really want is that friendliness you mentioned of "just curling up in a group to watch movies or being there to talk someone through a tough time. I don't have that and although I never really had that, I feel like that's what I'm missing in life.

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{*sweetbubblelipz*}

Posts: 71 | From: cincy, US | Registered: Oct 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
CJT
Assistant Director
Member # 40442

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I think that one of the most challenging parts of getting that in your life can be that it does take time. Developing those friendships and relationships where you feel like you can count on those people, open up to them and with them is something that can make you feel pretty vulnerable at times and can take some time to happen. It's definitely worth if if you ask me, but it's a process that can sometimes feel a little uncomfortable if you're not used to having that in your life. A good place to start might just be recognizing that what you're looking for isn't going to be something that you'll find instantly or automatically with another person or people. It'll take some time, getting to know them, hanging out, sharing things about yourself and learning about them, and getting that familiarity and comfort around each other.

Do you have any particular interests? Sometimes a good place to start meeting potential friends is through groups of people who share a similar interest or passion, whether it's a sport, arts, crafts, books, movies, a hobby, or whatever.

Posts: 384 | From: Philadelphia, PA | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
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{CJ Got it}

[ 06-20-2010, 10:16 PM: Message edited by: Stephanie_1 ]

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3415 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Harper85
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Member # 48968

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bubblez i feel like you did right now! i know this is an old post and will probably never get read but i am so alone and i finally find some one that doesn't pressure me into sex and being the first guy that i trust so i give him my v card and now after having him use me and seeing him moving on and on and on (he sleeps around) i just feel more insecure and i dont trust easy and all the friends i have live in one building the same one i do and i dont know how to go out and met new people im shy and quite i dont know what to do.
Posts: 9 | From: montana | Registered: Sep 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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