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Author Topic: HELP ME...
GraveMattasBoo
Neophyte
Member # 22974

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ok here it is my b.f is a up and commin raper and he really wants to do this but im not comfrotable w/ it b.c hes tlkin bout killin bitched and smoking weed and killn otha niggas....umm and i pissed him off b.c telling him i dont want him doing this and it made me sound like its all bout me how can i show him that its not all about me i jus dont want him getting beef like every one else does...u kno PLS HELP ME ....!!

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*~*~*KiMmIe*~*~*


Posts: 11 | From: clemmons nc usa | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wobblyheadedjane
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 11569

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Before people can help you, it's better if you help them by typing in standardized English, so that your post is easier to understand - just the like Guidelines you agreed to when you signed up say. Thank you.
Posts: 1679 | From: London, ON | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
GraveMattasBoo
Neophyte
Member # 22974

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ok well then here...my boyfriend is a up comming raper and i dont want him to be on becaues he is talkin about killin people and umm i dont want him to have the problems that all the other ones have and he got mad because i said i dont want him to and he said its all about me...and its not how can i show him that its not all about me...there can u unerstand that better?

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*~*~*KiMmIe*~*~*


Posts: 11 | From: clemmons nc usa | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bobolink
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Just barely. Is English your native language? Have you heard of spelling, grammar and punctuation?

If I understand you correctly, this boy is bad news to be avoided at all costs. When he says

quote:
and it made me sound like its all bout me
it sounds like he is trying to shift the blame for his bad behavior. This is a sign of future abusive behavior.

Gumdrop Girl, one of our other moderators has put together a checklist to see if you are in an abusive relationship:

I think is *SO* important that it deserves its own short thread for people to look over and evaluate whether they may be in an abusive relationship.

The following information was given to me by a classmate of mine who works extensively with battered women, but it all applies to both men and women.

Read ths following and if you check two or more on this list, you are in a relationship that is not safe for you.
Checklist
[] My partner is very jealous, gets jealous easily
[] My partner follows me around, checks up on me a lot
[] My partner tries to control how I dress or who I spend time with (friends, family, coworkers)
[] My partner yells, calls me names, puts me down
[] I hide things that I think would upset or anger my partner (phone numbers, letters, photos)
[] I am afraid to say no to sex
[] My partner threatens me, or has threatened me
[]My partner hits, throws or breaks things when angry
[] I am fraid to disagree with my partner
[] My partner has pushed, slapped, punched or otherwise hurt me
[]I feel like my partner's anger is my fault

And some links to check out if you think this applies to you and you need more help:
Break the Cycle - Empowering Youth to End Domestic Violence http://www.break-the-cycle.org/
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence http://www.webmerchant.com/ncadv

And if you are in the Los Angeles Area, Sojourn is an organization that offers services to battered women and their kids. Give them a call at (310)264.6644

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I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

- Galileo

[This message has been edited by Bobolink (edited 04-15-2005).]


Posts: 3442 | From: Stirling, Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wobblyheadedjane
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 11569

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Yes, that is better, thank you again.

Well, you've tried talking it over with him. Is this a deal-breaker for you relationship wise? If he decides to perform anyway in spite of you being uncomfortable, would you find it difficult to be in a relationship with him any longer? These are questions you need to ask him, and yourself. If you have a genuine problem with what he's saying as a rapper, and he chooses to disregard your feelings, you need to decide what you choose to do with that knowledge.


Posts: 1679 | From: London, ON | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
GraveMattasBoo
Neophyte
Member # 22974

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ok but i love him he said the next cd he does will be better but it wasnt....u mean...i dont want to upset him b.c tellin him i dont want him doing that b.c it brings money in u know what i am saying?

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*~*~*KiMmIe*~*~*


Posts: 11 | From: clemmons nc usa | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bobolink
Activist
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Is this the person you are marrying and is the father of your unborn child?
http://www.scarleteen.com/forum/Forum10/HTML/001001.html

Posts: 3442 | From: Stirling, Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
GraveMattasBoo
Neophyte
Member # 22974

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yes he is the same one y?
Posts: 11 | From: clemmons nc usa | Registered: Apr 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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