posted
My best friend who is a gay guy, he normally likes to have a relationship before sex but sometimes he'll have random hook ups. A long time ago, (Idk how long) one of his guy friends who has asperges syndrome and "obsesses over things", he asked my friend to have sex with him and he said no. The guy with asperges kind of begged him. He was begging him a lot of times like "oh please do it! please please please!" like every time they saw each other (and they were just friends!). Eventually my friend gave in and had sex with him just to shut him up. If he gave in, is that rape or consensual but just peer pressure?
-------------------- I am homo! Hear me roar! Elizabeth Lee! Elizabeth Me! Posts: 14 | From: NY | Registered: Sep 2011
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That is coercion you are describing, which in most states is classified as sexual assault or abuse.
Consensual sex is sex which occurs when everyone involved is freely consenting, which means not only that they have the capacity to consent, but also that when they say no, it's accepted and respected, not pushed until someone is worn down.
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63421 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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posted
Do u think I should suggest him to call the police?
-------------------- I am homo! Hear me roar! Elizabeth Lee! Elizabeth Me! Posts: 14 | From: NY | Registered: Sep 2011
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Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
Member # 90293
posted
Is this something you're just learning about now, or something you've known about for a while? I'm curious about whether this question is something you and your friend discussed, or something you wondered after hearing his story.
I'd start by talking to your friend about how he feels about the situation and what he thinks he might want to do. Going to the police is a good course of action if he wants to report. You can be most supportive to him by affirming that this was coercive sex and that he has options should he choose to take them.
-------------------- Robin Posts: 4402 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011
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