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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » antichoice women who abort

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Author Topic: antichoice women who abort
Heather
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quote:
Many anti-choice women are convinced that their need for abortion is unique -- not like those "other" women -- even though they have abortions for the same sorts of reasons. Anti-choice women often expect special treatment from clinic staff. Some demand an abortion immediately, wanting to skip important preliminaries such as taking a history or waiting for blood test results. Frequently, anti-abortion women will refuse counseling (such women are generally turned away or referred to an outside counselor because counseling at clinics is mandatory). Some women insist on sneaking in the back door and hiding in a room away from other patients. Others refuse to sit in the waiting room with women they call "sluts" and "trash." Or if they do, they get angry when other patients in the waiting room talk or laugh, because it proves to them that women get abortions casually, for "convenience".
quote:
When a patient comes in with my 'favorite' sentiment: 'The only moral abortion is my abortion,' I try to expand her understanding that a few more of us have had and deserve a 'moral' abortion. When a woman expands her need for care beyond herself, you no longer have an 'anti'." (Clinic Administrator, Louisiana)
quote:
"A 21 year old woman and her mother drove three hours to come to their appointment for an abortion. They were surprised to find the clinic a 'nice' place with friendly, personable staff. While going over contraceptive options, they shared that they were Pro-Life and disagreed with abortion, but that the patient could not afford to raise a child right now. Also, she wouldn't need contraception since she wasn't going to have sex until she got married, because of her religious beliefs. Rather than argue with them, I saw this as an opportunity for dialogue, and in the end, my hope was that I had planted a 'healing seed' to help resolve the conflict between their beliefs and their realities." (Physician, Washington State)
These are just three quotes from this piece -- http://mypage.direct.ca/w/writer/anti-tales.html -- which is a collection of quotes from doctors, nurses and clinicians who work in abortion on this topic.

It's a pretty eye-opening read.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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kitka
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A Planned Parenthood handbook on abortion notes that nearly half of all abortions are for women who describe themselves as born-again Christian, Evangelical Christian, or Catholic.

These are some of the same women who support curtailing or destroying Roe v Wade. What can they possibly be thinking? That somehow they'll be able to get an abortion in another state when their own state laws become too restrictive?
According to the article, a fair amount of women have multiple abortions... yet the anti-choice women are also some of the same who are trying to restrict access to BC.

... just doesn't make any sense!

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Heather
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I wish I had time to go into that today, because it is SO complex.

But as briefly as I can put it -- and I am close to more than a handful of previously evangelical women -- most of what they're thinking is that they do not know how to deal with the disparity between their beliefs and their actual lives, including things like being able to say no to sex when they want it, using birth control when they want it. Including things like the fact that for many, their faith -- which many have truly deep, earnest feelings for and investment in -- often echoes their own feelings of self-loathing; their own beliefs that by being women, they are not truly entitled to wonership of themselves, to human rights, etc. In some cases, it even feeds them feeling like the sinners they're told to be.

I even bungled that a little, but it's because it really is SO complex, and I always have a hard time addressing it personally because I feel very, very deeply for a lot of these women, but at the same time, some try very hard to essentially forcibly imprison myself and other women with the things they are *willingly* imprisoned by.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me • Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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dailicious
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The entire article is incredibly eye opening. It also reaffirms my position on personal abortion, that like most things in life, especially the most difficult, you CANNOT make a judgement or a decision on something until you have experienced it yourself.

I was raised very liberally, very pro-women, pro-equality and I followed suit when I learned about abortion and the issues surrounding it that I would take a pro-choice stance, and one of the things that bothered me EVERY time I heard it uttered was, "Well, I'd personally never get an abortion MYSELF" whether or not it was followed by pro-choice or anti-choice sentiment.

When I became sexually active I knew, logically, that for what I wanted to do in my life and what my plans for myself were, if I ever become pregnant abortion is probably a sound option for me. That said, because I have never BEEN pregnant, I have no way of knowing if at that time I could choose an abortion for myself or not. In that same yilk, I don't believe any woman can pre-determine that abortion will NEVER be something she needs to consider.

I think the closing of the article, as well, was a wonderful way to wrap it up. I think by demonstrating that women are sometimes able to really place abortion into a realistic viewpoint once they have had to place themselves directly into the situation they can view it as a much more human act, they can see it as something more sensible than murder.

It is only a shame that more women cannot turn it around and see it that way, and make excuses and blame others for the need of their own abortions.

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Jean
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September
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I have been pro-choice for as far back as I can think, because it always seemed like the only logical option to me. Personally, I know that I do not want children. However, having never been in the position, I have no idea what I would do should I end up pregnant. But that's just the thing - I do not presume to know how I will feel should I end up in the situation of an unplanned pregnancy. And that is exactly the thing that bothers me about pro-lifers - not only do they presume to know how they would feel, but they also have the audacity to proclaim that this choice is also the only one that is right for everyone else AND they endavour to make sure that their option is the only one that's possible for everyone else.

Sometimes it strikes as though some pro-lifers are actually afraid of having the option of abortion because they know very well that they'd rather abort an unwanted pregnancy, but also know that this would make them outcasts among their friends and family. Ergo: Let's eliminate that option so I don't get tempted and so that topic's off the table once and for all.

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Johanna
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"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

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Ecofem
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This reminds me of a classmate at college. She came from a very conservative family who was anti-choice until she got unexpectedly pregnant at 18 from her boyfriend. They suddenly changed gears and told her she had to have an abortion if she wanted their continued financial support. She ended up dropping out of the college, having the baby and eventually getting married to her boyfriend. I understand that they wanted her to finish her education, but suddenly handing out the other ultimatium didn't seem like the best answer either.

In any case, the article and statistics are very interesting although hardly surprising. I'm impressed that the clinic staff can have so much patience with people who are being so mean in a hypocritical way.

Back in the day, I remember some girls on the bus who were pressuing everyone to be "pro-life" in elementary school. I hadn't really understood the meaning in 4th grade, but my parents certainly were angry and explained why they were pro-choice. (I think at least one of those people got pregnant in high school.) I wonder if any of the other people had abortions...

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bluefreak44
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Sadly, that doesn't surprise me. Just to get it out in the open (not to start a riot), I am pro-life. However, it's much easier to say that abortion is wrong when it's not a choice you personally have to make. Honestly, if my husband and I had had sex before we got married and I had ended up pregnant, I very much doubt I would have gotten an abortion, but I can't say that it wouldn't cross my mind. I'm from a VERY conservative small town. It would seem easier to go out of town and get an abortion before any one knew I was pregnant than to carry and be an embarrassment. Here, abortion is considered wrong but sometimes unwed mothers are condemned. Condemning unwed mothers just seems to fuel the fire in my opinion.
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