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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Ethics and Politics » Groupies...how do you define that word, anyway?

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Author Topic: Groupies...how do you define that word, anyway?
towel42
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Okay, as far as I'm concerned, the connotation that pops into my head upon hearing the word "groupie" is a girl (or boy, I suppose) that hangs out at concerts and sleeps with the band, just because they're in the band and they want the perks that go along with being close to a band member. I don't know if this is necessarily true in this day and age. So I'm wondering, what is everyone's thoughts on this? And what do you think of groupies? Thank ya's muchly.
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Milke
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That's basically what I'd consider to be a groupie, too. So long as all sex is safe and consensual, I see no problem with this. Actually, if there were any modern groups I found attractive, I might take the Cynthis Plastercaster route, and take home trophies of my idols.
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towel42
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Hee hee, plastercaster...I remember hearing about that...

See, I'm wondering, cause everyone from my mom to some of my aquaintances calls me a groupie. But dammit, I'm not! I admit I go out of my way to go to concerts and hang out with my favorite bands, but its not like I DO anything with any of them. It gets insulting after awhile. I mean, the only reason I bother and care so much about all these bands is cause its what I want to do with my life. I'm fascinated by the music industry. So I don't consider myself a groupie...yet everyone calls me one.

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"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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Gumdrop Girl
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y'know, I've been called a groupie, too, by those who don't know what a groupie is generally considered to be.

to my understanding, a groupie is someone who follows the band around and offers sexual favors. I have to admit, i have a bit of disdain for this behavior because it tends to reflect badly on folks like me who just follow bands around and schmooze a lot. then again, if they're of legal age and totally consenting, then that's their choice, so be it.

back to me. i've met loads of bands thru dfferent tactics. i've done everything from waited in the cold outside a tourbus, tagged along with friends during interviews they were conducting, emailed, and even worked for a record company. I have never had to offer my body to any band.

I take the word "groupie" as an insult for the reason that I don't want to be lumped in with those other people who do offer up special favors. From all the groupies i have talked to (they're not bad people, but I don't prefer their modus operandi), it seems like they do what they do because they like to live vicariously through the band -- the glamour, the fame, the hard-partying. Me, I feel like I don't need to validate myself by who I sleep with. i also don't want to be objectified as a sex toy by the bands I admire -- i want to meet them and talk to them on a level that is intellectual or at least social.

So far, I think i've done a good job. I have amazing rapport with two of my favorite bands. I have guest-pass and backstage priveleges with two high-profile bands. And last week, i was able to get very close to Damon Albarn (blur, Gorillaz) because i had label connections.

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towel42
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quote:
Originally posted by Gumdrop Girl:
y'know, I've been called a groupie, too, by those who don't know what a groupie is generally considered to be.

to my understanding, a groupie is someone who follows the band around and offers sexual favors. I have to admit, i have a bit of disdain for this behavior because it tends to reflect badly on folks like me who just follow bands around and schmooze a lot. then again, if they're of legal age and totally consenting, then that's their choice, so be it.

back to me. i've met loads of bands thru dfferent tactics. i've done everything from waited in the cold outside a tourbus, tagged along with friends during interviews they were conducting, emailed, and even worked for a record company. I have never had to offer my body to any band.

I take the word "groupie" as an insult for the reason that I don't want to be lumped in with those other people who do offer up special favors. From all the groupies i have talked to (they're not bad people, but I don't prefer their modus operandi), it seems like they do what they do because they like to live vicariously through the band -- the glamour, the fame, the hard-partying. Me, I feel like I don't need to validate myself by who I sleep with. i also don't want to be objectified as a sex toy by the bands I admire -- i want to meet them and talk to them on a level that is intellectual or at least social.

So far, I think i've done a good job. I have amazing rapport with two of my favorite bands. I have guest-pass and backstage priveleges with two high-profile bands. And last week, i was able to get very close to Damon Albarn (blur, Gorillaz) because i had label connections.


Exactly, thats exactly how I feel. Hell, you sound a lot like me, LoL, except I've never worked at a label (I'm still a bit young). But one day, I plan to! But yeah, I've never had to get sexual with band members to get them to like me and my friends, just by showing up, waiting around, showing support, telling the bands what they mean to me, etc. I've gotten to know so many bands, they're generally all cool people, to me at least because they have the same interests and lead interesting lives. So I can't help but enjoy spending time with them.

It is awful though, that just cause I'm a girl, if I'm hanging around with a band, people assume I'm sleeping with them or something. I hate being looked at like that, I don't mean to be bitter but its a double standard. If a guy is hanging around a band they tend to be looked at as "cool", but I'm looked at like a groupie.

And I agree that if its all consensual, then let the girls do it, although they'll probably regret living like that at one point or another. Some of those groupie girls (I'm not saying all, I don't like to generalize) have no life of their own, no jobs, nothing, they live off the band members they're sleeping with. When they get old and wrinkley, they'll have to realize they can't get away with that lifestyle anymore, and then where will they be?

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"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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CutiePie4eva
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hmm... this is wierd... the first time i every even HEARD of a groupie was two days ago... there was a shirt in a store that said GROUPIE across the top... and my friend was joking around and sed another one of my friends should get that... and then he had to explain to me what a groupie was cuase i was like... uhhh... okay... i dont get it... wats a groupie... anywat... to me its sounds like a prostitute casue your just getting stuff for sexual favors... but watevers... people should do wat they want... its their life
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Beppie
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quote:
And last week, i was able to get very close to Damon Albarn (blur, Gorillaz) because i had label connections.

[/B]


A bit off topic, but I have a friend who has been in love with him since she was in 8th grade.


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Miss Thang
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hey- are y'all watching real world chicago? you know the girl who slept with the rock star? i know who the rock star is!! it's the singer from freddy jones band (GOOD band, man)
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towel42
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quote:
Originally posted by Miss Thang:
hey- are y'all watching real world chicago? you know the girl who slept with the rock star? i know who the rock star is!! it's the singer from freddy jones band (GOOD band, man)

No, it was like, Big Head Todd and the something-or-others. I live in Chicago, so I just searched through the bands that were at that festival (yeah, I'm a loser, so shoot me) and one band's website, their guestbook thing was just covered in "yeah, real good job covering up the lead singer MTV, you must think people are stupid" etc etc.

------------------
"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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BruinDan
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quote:
Originally posted by towel42:
No, it was like, Big Head Todd and the something-or-others

Aahhh, you are speaking of Big Head Todd and the Monsters, whose 1997 album "Beautiful World" is currently in my CD player.

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towel42
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quote:
Originally posted by BruinDan:
Aahhh, you are speaking of Big Head Todd and the Monsters, whose 1997 album "Beautiful World" is currently in my CD player.


Yes yes, thats the one. The lead singer slept with chick from the Real World, yup yup, I'm sure he's just gotta *love* having that one on his record. Note to all aspiring rock stars: when cameras are around, take a break from the groupies.

------------------
"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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HeatherRocksMyBobbySocks
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Plastercasts, wheee! (read about them in Bust: Guide to a New Girl's Order, a strongly recomended book. STRONGLY. I'll go get it for you, I want you to read it that much).

When I think of groupies I think of girls who sleep with bands. I think that's cool. Safe, sane, and consensual and it's good in my book. And actually, there are a few people that I'd adore being a groupie for. Unfortunatly, I don't think they'd want me as some of them are married or not the groupie-type, in my opinion. (hmmm, Ani Difranco, Bjork, Dexter Holland from the Offspring....)

That's why you guys are band-aids, not groupies (golly, what movie was that from? I don't remember if the 'band-aids' actually slept with the band, but I don't think so).


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towel42
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quote:
Originally posted by HeatherRocksMyBobbySocks:

That's why you guys are band-aids, not groupies (golly, what movie was that from? I don't remember if the 'band-aids' actually slept with the band, but I don't think so).


Hehehehe, Almost Famous, only one of the greatest movies of all time. Band-aids..."no sex, just blowjobs, we respect our bodies!". Hmm, I'm sick, maybe I can get a friend to rent that for me, along with Interview With a Vampire (aaah, love that movie) and make me some chicken soup.

But naw, I'm not a band-aid either, although me and my friends joke about that all the time, just a dedicated fan obsessed with music.

------------------
"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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towel42
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Aaah, I just watched "Almost Famous". I hadn't seen that in awhile...yes yes, there's a movie that gives an accurate picture of the groupie scene in the music industry.

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"We are different kids with the same heartbeat/we got one pulse running through the streets/they are our arteries/I am part of this." -The Distillers-

"I'm alright, I'm gonna make it, even if I gotta fake it..." -Sugarcult-

"If I wanted to drink my own piss, I'd pee in a cup!" -a friend on MGD beer.


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bambislick
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well to me groupies are little, desperate, needy girls who need attention and they think the way to do this is by having sex with guys in a band and bragging to their equally pathetic friends about it. i kind of know what i'm talking about, as i dated a guy in a pretty popular rock band and after every show they play there are girls trying to get in their dressing rooms and waiting for them backstage and pulling all kinds of lovely attention getting stunts, such as throwing panties onstage or flashing the band. now, i dont know about the other band member...i believe there was one who actually had some form of sex with a girl onstage but my exboyfriend's opinion of groupies is quite low....he thought of them as the dirty little girls that they are. they are to be used and thrown away...
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Gumdrop Girl
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Hey now, my opinion of groupies isn't great either, but let's not judge. Yes, many of them are troubled individuals who resort to bragging about their so-called "conquests," but some are real admirers, and many of them are of legal age and are capable of giving consent.

So, R. Kelly's being indicted on child porn charges. Here lieth the seedier side of groupiedom. In this case, allegedly, R. Kelly used his stardom to exploit underage girls for sex. Alledgedly, a tape shows him having sex with a 14-year-old girl.

I can't knock someone for giving consent and willingly participating in sexual activity. But when the matter is a celebrity using his/her stature to coerce admirers or aspiring artists into sex, then it's wrong any way you slice it.

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Cherokee1696
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quote:
Originally posted by HeatherRocksMyBobbySocks:
Plastercasts, wheee! (read about them in Bust: Guide to a New Girl's Order, a strongly recomended book. STRONGLY. I'll go get it for you, I want you to read it that much).

What's it about?


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ConfusedGirl1
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Dude... this whole thing makes me think of one of my favorite movies, "Almost Famous." Only they say (in the movie) that they want to be called "band-aids, not groupies."


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