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Author Topic: I said yes.
mizchastain
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I decided to talk to the e-pal who says he likes me, and we decided to give a romantic relationship a go. I've talked to him on the phone and we trust each other. We obviously can't have sex what with the distance but neither of us would really want to even if we were near enough, so that's okay. I'm a little weirded out by the whole situation, but I figured it's worth trying. I've denied myself a lot of things over the years because of fear that they might not go well, and I don't think I can do it with this. For all I know one of us might relocate one day. Even if nothing does come of it eventually, we'll both have good memories, and I'm sure we'll remain friends. Fingers crossed.
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Saffron Raymie
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How exciting! I've very happy for you. [Smile]

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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mizchastain
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I don't really know where it's going to go from here. Pretty much all that's changed so far is what words we use to refer to each other. I have no idea how I'm going to tell my parents, since I came out to my mum as asexual a couple of months ago and from her point of view this is going to look like taking it back ... I don't know. I think he's worth it though.
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WesLuck
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Remember, all we know regarding our orientation is how we feel now. I think it's unfair that people get upset when we need to change our labels. There's this myth that when you label yourself with regards to your orientation, you are somehow not meant to ever change it. But labels are only references, and no one has knowledge of their entire future and how everything relates to everything else. Just see how it goes and take it from there. [Smile] If you don't want a label, or you want an accurate label, choose "questioning" or maybe better would be "undecided". (If others don't like it that's their problem. [Smile] )

[ 04-27-2012, 11:25 AM: Message edited by: WesLuck ]

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moonlight bouncing off water
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Hey Wesluck, I get what you're saying (and mizchastain, correct me if I'm wrong), but I believe that mizchastain means that this still fits within asexuality, for her. But that her mother will see it as not fitting within asexuality and may percieve it as taking back her coming out.

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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mizchastain
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Yeah, that's what I meant. Coming out was awkward enough. Is it appropriate to tell her via email? I don't want to confront her face to face and this way I can link her to some websites which explain it better than I can.

Just had a fortune cookie which said "good news will come from far away". Appropriate [Smile]

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moonlight bouncing off water
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Whether it makes sense to tell her via e-mail is really about the dynamic you have with her. Does it seem like it would alleviate any stress bound to the situation, or would it be more likely to create anxiety about discussing it the next time you saw her? (And if you don't mind me asking, do you live with your parents?) I think that if it seems like a good option that there is nothing wrong with it. [Smile]

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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mizchastain
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I live independently most of the time but stay with my parents at weekends. My mum did once say that if there was anything I wanted to tell say that I couldn't say out loud I could email instead, so maybe I should.
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moonlight bouncing off water
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Then yeah, it sounds like your mother would be just as receptive to this news via e-mail as she would in person, and like you'd feel better about it too, so I'd say if that's what you want to do, go ahead.

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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WesLuck
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Oh, as in romantic asexual. Got it.
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mizchastain
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Decided to get it over with and tell my parents face to face. Was a lot easier than I expected, and they're okay with it. Yay! [Smile]
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moonlight bouncing off water
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That's awesome! I'm so glad it went well for you!

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~moonlight

I am ME and that is the only label I need.

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Sans
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Yay for you!! It's great that everything worked out with your parents! [Smile]

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"Sneak away, sneak away / If the fate is too sad / You are not a flower of hell / That kind of place... / Don't become lost, don't become lost... / Or you won't be able to grasp the entangled hand / The cry also has a limit...." - Naraku no Hana

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