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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » This guy has me SO confused!

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Author Topic: This guy has me SO confused!
BellaMenina
Neophyte
Member # 102177

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I posted about this guy before but now my heart is all confused.
So I met this guy online about a month ago.
The day I met him he had to leave out of state and is going to stay there for 2 months to visit family.
We're both 20.
We'd been texting everyday since we met and I really like him and I think he likes me too because he told me that when he gets back he'd love to go on dates with me and if it works he'd love to be my boyfriend.
The thing is, throughout the day he rarely texts me.
Actually, since Valentine's day he doesn't text me anymore unless I text him and if I text him he'll reply about 3 times and that's it.
When he does text me he doesn't text me until it's night because I'm assuming he's busy with his family.
I text him "Good morning" and then again at night just saying "Goodnight" and nothing, no reply.
I don't know, I could be acting all weird but what do you guys think?
I don't want to sound clingy.
Should I give him a dose of his own medicine and NOT texting back?
See I sometimes think that he's not interested anymore but the few times we still text during the day we're both very flirty and he'll tell me things like, "OMG I can't wait to meet you already! I can't wait to spend time with you!"
Ugh maybe I'm overreacting.
I say, I shouldn't text him anymore for a few days!
What are your thoughts?
Ugh help?

Posts: 19 | From: London | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Onionpie
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 41699

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Hi BellaMenina! Unfortunately, we don't have the ability to read this guy's mind for you [Smile] So the only way to know what's going on and how he's feeling is to ask him, not us! There are various reasons why he may not be replying to your texts as often as you'd like, so you could speculate all day, but the way to find out how he's feeling around this is to talk to him. Do you think you'll be able to do that? Want some help figuring out how to go about asking him about this?
Posts: 1311 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
BellaMenina
Neophyte
Member # 102177

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Ugh yeah I need some help figuring out what to ask him! :[
Posts: 19 | From: London | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Well *I* hear you saying there are some things you want to know, like:
• That you don't know if he doesn't text you at certain times because he's busy, or because he's not interested.
• That you feel uncertain about his interest in you.
• That you can't tell if the texts you send him are things he wants, or is receptive to.

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BellaMenina
Neophyte
Member # 102177

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Yeah I'm not sure about any of those. I'm just afraid that he's not interested anymore.
Posts: 19 | From: London | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Haleigh H
Volunteer-in-training
Member # 103145

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Hi BellaMenina,

I know it can be so hard to ask tough questions to people we're interested in or care about. It sucks to feel rejected. Sometimes I find it really hard to ask tough questions when I know I may not want to hear the answer. Is that how your feeling? Or am I way off?

Sometimes I find it easier to ask tough questions like these if I tell on myself a little bit and say something like, I feel so awkward asking this question but I have to know... or something like that. Do you think that would help?

The other part of that is preparing yourself for an answer that may hurt. But, on the other hand he may just be busy.

Onionpie is right though, there is no reading minds and it doesn't help to speculate. If its bothering you the best thing to do is communicate with him about it. What do you think?

--------------------
Haleigh

Posts: 176 | From: Kansas City, Missouri | Registered: Feb 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
BellaMenina
Neophyte
Member # 102177

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Yeah I don't want to feel or be rejected since he said he was interested in being my boyfriend.
I think you all are right.
Maybe I should just ask him if he's even interested anymore.

Posts: 19 | From: London | Registered: Jan 2013  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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