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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » Seeing Ex

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Author Topic: Seeing Ex
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My ex of a little over 2 months has agreed to let me come visit him tomorrow. We're planning on just going to eat and see a movie, but my mom doesn't think this is a good idea. We didn't end on bad terms, and we've been having great conversations since the breakup, and I just think it'd be really nice to be able to catch up in person. He seems excited about seeing me too, which is good. I don't expect us to get back together after this, and he's said that this "isn't a date". I guess I'm just asking for experiences of this sort and whether or not this is a bad idea. I really do want to see him but at the same time, I don't want to be back at square one as far as the breakup goes. I really do feel better about the breakup and don't have any hard feelings toward him, so I think I'll be okay.
Posts: 255 | Registered: Jul 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Hi Roxie,

I think it's hard for any of us to say definitely whether or not it's a bad idea, especially because it sounds like both you and your ex are on the same page about the fact that this isn't a date.

I don't know why your mom feels the way she does, but in the past I've found that it takes me longer than I think to get over an ex. Two months is long enough for some people, but not long enough for others.

My suggestion: have fun, stay safe, and make sure that there's a "way out" if you don't feel comfortable (a way to get home or someone you can call for a ride). However, the situation as you've described it isn't raising any red flags for me.

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Hi Roxie102!

I'm in agreement with Fiveanddime, too. It sounds like you and your ex have a good relationship with him, and it's nice that you want to stay friends or be on a casual basis.

I would be a bit cautious about seeing him and managing your feelings. I think it also depends on the ex and how the break-up occurred, but if you are truly at ease with seeing him, it sounds like this is something you'd like to do and something that can be fun. I have an ex that I've remained on good terms with, and we hang out once in a while; but I'm the kind of person who takes a long time to heal after a break-up, so I would be cautious of your feelings and just tread lightly before, during, and after the outing.

Again, it's great that you and your ex want to hang out, but as Fiveanddime mentioned, make sure you have a way out in case you for any reason want to go home early. Take care of yourself and know that whatever you do feel about this get-together or otherwise- good or bad, regardless - is perfectly okay. [Smile]

"I do the best that I can. I'm just what I am." - Rush (Best I Can)

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Thanks everyone, here's an update...

I ended up going, and we had a fantastic day. It's been a while since we had so much fun together. We spent the whole afternoon together and he wasn't even ready for me to go when it came time for me to go. I was a little concerned about how I would feel when I saw him, but we laughed and joked and genuinely had a great time. I'm more than glad I went to see him. We even agreed to see each other the next time I have a break from college. We're honestly each other's best friends and I'm so happy to still have him in my life.

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