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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Relationships » phone billlll aaaaaa!!!

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Author Topic: phone billlll aaaaaa!!!
Member # 44883

Icon 13 posted      Profile for liz999     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
so my stepdad had some problems with kidney
failure, he was hospitalized for around 3 weeks,
and now is going through dialisis 3 times a week.
isnt able to drive or work anymore.the 3 weeks
he was there, my mom stood with him at the
hospital and so she left me her cell phone since
mine wasnt working.they have the most ridiculous
phone plan ever.[1,000 anytime minutes, free
nights and weekends.] i thought NIGHTS started at
7pm so, every day for the entire 3 weeks me and
my boyfriend would start talking at around that
time.i recieved the phone bill 2 weeks ago.



=\.dear do i tell my mom.

(my stepdad and mom's phones are in 1 plan,
which is the 1,000 minute one.TOGETHER.which
means each one should spend 500 min.stepdad
went over a lil too.which makes me have to
pay around $580.00,which me and my boyfriend
are dividing up and paying.still, how do i tell
my mom the cost is $818.98 and her not going
phsyco.) =S


Posts: 8 | From: houston,tx | Registered: Dec 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 33665

Icon 1 posted      Profile for orca     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I think it's important to be honest with her, but when you tell her, don't come at it by blaming their phone plan or saying you didn't know, etc. It's their phone plan, not yours, so you don't have a right to say that you think it's ridiculous; unless you pay a share into it monthly, then you can't say what its faults are. As well, not knowing is no excuse. It's your responsibility to find out the specifics of the plan prior to making phone calls. So when you tell her, don't shift blame or claim ignorance or any of that. Just say that you know you messed up and you're sorry, and here's what you will do to fix it. Then tell her how you and your boyfriend will pay for your part of the phone bill.

If she blows a fuse, she blows a fuse, but talking calmly and owning up to your mistake while working to fix it may help prevent her from becoming too upset. It sounds like she has a lot on her plate right now (a partner in the hospital with liver failure is pretty heavy, both in terms of emotions and finances), so probably the last thing she wants is an argument over the phone bill.

I gather that your stepdad is out of work at the moment due to illness, is that right? Hospital bills are crazy expensive (and actually, most bankruptcies occur because of medical expenses, even when someone has insurance), so it might be good to do all you can to help lessen the financial expenses around the house, including with future phone bills. Also, you said in this thread that every time you and your boyfriend talk on the phone, he belittles you and there's an argument. It might be a good idea to talk less on the phone (maybe skip a few nights, because honestly, talking to a partner every single night is kind of a lot, financial costs aside) for both financial reasons and your own emotional well-being.

How are you doing with all of this, in terms of your stepdad's illness? Do you need some support or want to talk about it?

Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.--Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Posts: 2726 | From: North America | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 44883

Icon 1 posted      Profile for liz999     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
well,my stepdad's back from the hospital.
and my mom is under alot of stress because
he constantly needs someone there, which is
her.things dont bother me right now that much
i mean i understand that my mom has to be there
for him through these difficult times, even if
i get a little less attention as a result.i
havent really talked to him, [we have never
really talked alot.] ever since he's back, im
not the one to bring up a conversation because
i just dont know what to say.blahhh.

as to me and my boyfriend's issues.they seem
to be settled for now.i comfronted him about
everything that was bothering me yesterday,
and he finally understood my point.such a hard
headed man! ugh.i let him know that i had been
thinking about loosing weight even before he
brought it up, but once he did and acted like
such an *** i simply felt discouraged instead
of upbeat and determined to do it because of the
way he came about things.he apologized and let
me know some things that made me understand his
point a little more clearly, at the end he
agreed to support me fully in what ever decision
i decided to take, which IS loosing weight.and
am feeling great about it knowing that now i have
his total support.


Posts: 8 | From: houston,tx | Registered: Dec 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 37835

Icon 1 posted      Profile for atm1     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, then, why don't you make an appointment with your doctor like Heather suggested in your other thread. The diet discussed there is NOT healthy and will likely do more harm than good, so it would be sound to check in with a doctor now (maybe a nutritionist if your insurance will cover that) so that you don't hurt your body in an effort to loose weight.

You're right that it might be wise for you to wait another day or two before talking to your mom, but you can start a conversation with "There's something I really need to talk to you about" and go from there.

Posts: 2262 | From: in transition | Registered: Apr 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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