posted
I went out with my best guy friend yesterday to celebrate his birthday and there was a lots of alcohol involved and we both drank way too much.
I don't remember everything that happened at the bar and such but I remember that we both ended up at the end of the night having sex. I really like him I think more than a friend but just think that it might be best to just stay friends at least for now, I don't want to jeopardize our friendship and I know were we both not drunk, we wouldn't have done it. It's just how we tend to both be when we're drunk.
We weren't able to think straight obviously and it didn't come to our mind at that time to use a condom or any other birth control method.
I'm now freaking out about becoming pregnant even though I've taken plan B this morning. I'm also really scared that this is going to affect our friendship. We both didn't know what to say this morning and he said that we were going to talk about that later on this weekend because we both had to leave early this morning. I just don't know what to tell him. Sex was just very ackward.
Too, I feel very guilty for letting things go like that, for not being able to say no to sex and resist the impulses.
posted
I personally don't think guilt is of use to anyone: how about, instead, just taking away what learns from this you had?
For instance, you say you two are inclined to be this way when drunk: so, moving forward, you know that getting drunk together is probably not a wise idea, particularly if you are alone or choose to go be alone. So, from here on out, you know not to do that.
You probably already knew, but now have more to know with that, that getting drunk period isn't so wise. Perhaps if there is a next time with drinking, and you get to a point where you know you're feeling tipsy, that's the point where you call a cab and ask a friend who you know will NOT have sex with you for a ride home.
In terms of how to deal with the aftermath, you took Plan B, which you know is all you can do to reduce the risk of pregnancy. You can also be sure to update your STI screenings in a month or two.
And when a few days have passed, you two can talk about this in terms of your friendship, and see where this leaves both of you. In terms of what you say, this is your friend, so in my book, you just speak honestly.
-------------------- Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen About Me • Get our book! Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead Posts: 63418 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000
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posted
There was a point where I felt like I had to get home and end the drinking because I was feeling very dizzy, tired, couldn't walk or see straight and I was starting to do silly things that I would not do otherwise such as hooking up with random people at the bar.
When I asked my friend, he told me that he was not ready to go home, that he was having lots of fun. And he was like buying me shooters and drinks. It's really silly because we even left our drinks at the table without anyone to watch them when we went to the bathroom and such. We were really lucky that nothing happened to us.
I don't know if I would have been able to call a taxi because I wasn't even able to figure out how to get out of the bar, I was loosing balance and was very dizzy, couldn't walk straight. We both were really a mess. My friend said the morning after that I couldn't even talk properly in the end and that therefore had troubles understanding me.
I still feel very guilty for letting myself go like that, really bad things could have happened. A few more drinks and I think I would have ended up at the hospital.
I also don't know what to think of what happened, about us two having sex. I'm a bit mad at him to be honest. I know it's not fair for me to think like that but even though I understand he was drunk too, I would have liked him to turn down the sex, to say no to sex.
posted
I've called him yesterday and we both had a talk about what happened and I told him that what we did was a mistake and that I'd prefer him to just be friends for now.
It didn't feel as ackward as I tought it would be.
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